To not pick up the peas?

[inpixiehollow]

We were invited out yesterday for sunday lunch with my MIL and her 94 year old mother. We went to a local pub, me and my partner, MIL, partners grandma and our 11 month old daughter.
I hadn't been to the pub before but wasn't impressed with it, the food wasn't great and the pub needed a good clean everywhere but we made the best of it wanting to be polite. We all had a carvery and I shared some of mine onto my daughters plate including peas. When we were done there was some mess left under the highchair (honestly not much at all, some very small bits of meat and peas) MIL's mum remarked that our daughter had made such a mess. I replied that it would only take a few minutes for them to sweep/hoover it up but she seemed horrified I wasn't going to get on my hands and knees on a pretty dirty carpet, in 29 degree heat and diligently pick up each scrap of food. I should add that the pub was almost empty too so no reason why the staff wouldn't have time to quickly tidy up. Having worked in hospitality I wouldn't have expected parents to bother about this small amount of food on the floor? I wiped down the highchair and the table where she had left gravy/mashed potato but left the, at the most 10 peas on the floor.. WIBU?

Wow! From my experience, NO-ONE clears up after their kids. I have actually never seen anyone do this. Not in pubs, John Lewis, or restaurants!

I didn’t think I was particularly noble!

@Jaxhog

Wow! From my experience, NO-ONE clears up after their kids. I have actually never seen anyone do this. Not in pubs, John Lewis, or restaurants!

Seriously never?

That just goes to show how simple it is to quickly bend down and do (again, just as if you'd dropped your phone or something).

The fact you've never ever noticed it just proves that point.

I pick up my children's spilt food, I used to have to do it in a childhood waitressing job and it was grim. My children's spit isn't toooo offensive to me, so it's a small task to prevent someone else having to do it.

I ran a pub and would never have expected a mum to get down on her hands and knees and pick up food. We had proper brooms and dustpans for that. Also would expect you to clean the high chair. We had proper sprays and cloths. YANBU.

*wouldn't

@Greyhare

I would say that you may have worked in 'hospitality' but you have never waitressed if you think someone is happy to clear up after your kids.

I wasn't "happy" about it, but it was part of my job as a server. Wasn't thrilled about any aspects of the job, but still did it as that's what I was paid for. Takes too minutes when you have the proper gear. Would never have wanted someone down on their hands and knees on the floor picking up food.

@moynomore

I ran a pub and would never have expected a mum to get down on her hands and knees and pick up food. We had proper brooms and dustpans for that. Also would expect you to clean the high chair. We had proper sprays and cloths. YANBU.

Your customers didn't bend in the middle, so would therefore have to get down on their hands and knees?

How strange.

I am a waitress and getting on the floor to sweep up food is one of the worst parts of my job. I’m fine with sweeping a few crumbs but but if a child has left bits of meat on the floor I’d be disgusted and quite resentful that the parent hasn’t picked it up

I ran a pub and would never have expected a mum to get down on her hands and knees and pick up food

I think at most the OP would have had to bend down.

Do you pick up your hair clippings after you've had it cut at the hairdressers?

This has to be the most ridiculous statement I've heard today.

I have a mental image of all these parents rolling around the floor in the dropped food, like a dog rolling in fox shit 😂😂

Sorry, it's all this ridiculous talk of 'hands and knees'

What's ridiculous is expecting restaurant patrons to pick dropped food up off the floor.

@bookworm20

Do you pick up your hair clippings after you've had it cut at the hairdressers?

This has to be the most ridiculous statement I've heard today.

Yes, I think a better equivalent would've been...

If the hairdresser has swept the hair into a pile in the corner, would you allow your child to throw it all over the rest of the floor and then walk out?

Or would you apologise and sweep it back into the corner - thus leaving the salon as you found it?

Former waitress. Hated the mess parents left behind when they had kids. Disgusting sometimes. I even had one woman who's kid was sick and then she had the gall to come up to the cash desk, say she was leaving and oh my kid was sick it need a cleaning up. People suck that's why I left hospitality! I dread to think what the OPs house looks like. Probably a shit hole!

I always clean up after DS. Putting a muslin under the high chair makes it easier.

I usually would but I went to a pub when my DD was little, the floor was horrendous already, I didn't then because I wasn't picking up what looked like it 10 people's worth of food. Always have since though.

Obviously people clean up sick and what not after their children at home where they have the proper equipment and sprays.

YABU - I agree you should have cleaned it up. I always have

Looking at this from a different perspective, while I certainly would not leave a huge mess under the table, neither would I be cleaning the floor to the standard that I would expect the next customer to find it in. That would be impossible without equipment anyway. It must be part of the staff’s job to check the floor before the table is made available again- adults drop crumbs too, and worse, and they might not even think to check on the floor before they leave.

Another vote for picking up the worst of the mess on the floor and cleaning the high chair. As I did when my kids were that age. I think it's grim how some parents leave tables and high chairs in restaurants.

I always picked up the mess! It's very disrespectful not too, IMO.
These people are not skivvies.
YABVVVU.

@HaveringWavering

Looking at this from a different perspective, while I certainly would not leave a huge mess under the table, neither would I be cleaning the floor to the standard that I would expect the next customer to find it in. That would be impossible without equipment anyway. It must be part of the staff’s job to check the floor before the table is made available again- adults drop crumbs too, and worse, and they might not even think to check on the floor before they leave.

Yes, I don't think anyone's saying it should be left in a high standard.

Just that it's basic manners to pick up dropped food after yourself or your kids, instead of expecting waiting staff to clear it up for you.

I do wonder if some of the kids who are being dragged up with this sort of lazy attitude, might hopefully end up the opposite to their parents when they're old enough to realise how shitty they are to treat staff like that.

I always pick up the big bits of food dropped by my DC. Just used a wipe. I would pick up peas.

You decided not to pick up the peas based on your perception of the pub, but actually it reflects badly on you. Poor manners.

I think a more apt analogy than the hairdresser one is, if you had a cleaner would you leave your skid marks on the toilet.

I mean the cleaners there anyway - right ?

But no unless you have some sort of physical disability which means you can't clean them and which cleaner is aware of, there's clearly limits to what you should expect other people to do for you .