Little girl in beautiful dress scolded for jumping up and down.

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They were at the bus stop. She was about 5 It was a beautiful white dress with embroidery, and matching shoes She had a carton of juice, and was told off for a little skip of pleasure at the sight of their bus coming, in case the juice splashed on her dress or her shoes. Brother that looked the same age, maybe twins, or just very small age gap, in dark clothes and trainers, also drinking a carton of juice with a straw, leaping up and down like a show jumper, without attracting comment.

WIBU to say something?

It's pretty normal for anybody wearing light coloured clothing to be more conscious of dirty seats, or leaving marks.

For children, maybe not so much, which is why a parent will explain it to them, or in some cases, yes admonish them if they aren't taking heed.

If two children are playing in a park, a boy wearing an expensive watch, and a girl wearing a cheap plastic one, you might reasonably expect a parent to tell off the boy, and warn him to be careful for similar reasons.
It's pretty instinctive isn't it?

@zoemum2006

This is just one example of the way girls are physically restricted by their clothing. I’ve always put my girls in trousers and comfy shoes/ trainers so they can be as free as boys are to exist in the world.

Do you allow your children any choice in their clothing?

I did. I believed Dd was able to make such choices within reason. So she did spend a couple of years or so pretty much only wearing dresses and skirts . I have photographs of her climbing trees, at the park, rubbing around manically with friends etc, all in dresses - often pumps or trainers rather than smart shoes though, mind they wouldn't have gone down well on MN these days as they were usually her choosing of pink and glitter. As a teen she spends most of her live in jeans and t shirts, only wearing a dress for going out really. Again her choice.

I do know that wearing a dress, even a pink or a light coloured one, didn't hamper her tendencies to climb everything and anything!

From the fact she was dressed up and he wasn't I would say it was probably more likely she was going somewhere.

It's more believable she was heading to a party that she needed to stay clean for than her Mother was enforcing a 1960's gender stereotype.

People still say 'scolded' ?

Evidently

It is still a fairly good term for a strong rebuke.

You would have been unreasonable to say something as you have no idea about the context.

Might have been her communion dress. They cost €€€. Yabvu

You have no idea where they are going or anything about them!! Jeez hope I don’t run into you at a bus stop with my kids that don’t sit still

You would have been hideously unreasonable to say anything!!

@Jerima

Not another fucking hero!

We end up undoing the damage blah blah. Leave people alone, mind your business, get over yourself and stop demonising parents.

Yep, spot on.

Of course YWBVU. It’s not your child, not your business.

The parents were idiots for
a) dressing her like that to travel on a bus rather than taking the dress with them for her to change into, if it was so important for her to stay clean.
b) giving her a drink in the street, in said dress, for the same reason. The OP is just making an observation about life as she saw it, and this is my comment on how I see it!

What would you even had said to the parent?

Unless the children had chosen their own clothes there was sexism going on here- just like there is in schools with specific uniform requirements up and down the country.

But you know nothing of why the children were dressed as they were and would have been very unreasonable to comment on someone else's parenting, which for all you know could have been very reasonable.

Maybe the girl had begged to wear the dress and had been warned if she did she needed to be very careful not to get it grubby. Why should a random have to explain that to you?

What a shame fir the wee girl.

My God

There is nothing idiotic about making a child aware of the consequences of messing about whilst having a drink. It would be the same at a bus stop, or at a party. Children messing about whilst eating food or drinking is likely to end up in spillage... and on nice clothing, it's all the more important to avoid it.

Only an idiot would fail to recognise that!

The weather's been incredibly hot. It's not ridiculous to give a child a drink, regardless of that they are wearing. Asking for them to drink it sensibly is the valid thing to do, and she did.

Maybe it was a one off and they were on their way to a wedding!

Why is this not everyone’s business?
Because you dint know the full story. Maybe the girl was persistently jumping around and brother started to copy?🤷‍♀️it may only been the girl that was going to a party or something so it didn't matter do much if the lad got a bit messy.

Of course it's all speculation. I know as much as you
Dirty clothes always meant my daughter had a fun time.
Plus, that's what washing machines are for.
That's fantastic but if I was on my way to an event which meant best clothes I would be telling my kid off for the same thing. It would be different on the way home when it it didn't matter as much.

We end up trying to u do the damage with these girls sitting in front of us in the classroom, eventually, but by secondary school it can be very deeply ingrained

Careful you don’t hurt yourself with that massive stretch.

Casual sexism, misogyny comes from so many places. A wee girl being told not to get her dress dirty is not it. She could have been on her way to a party or something and getting in a mess was not an option. Judging someone on a small snapshot is ridiculous.

a) dressing her like that to travel on a bus rather than taking the dress with them for her to change into, if it was so important for her to stay clean.

You would take your child to a party and have them get changed there?

My god, keep your beak out!

What if she'd begged to wear that dress and her mum said "ok but you can't spill on it".

Really would not give this a second thought

I would say ‘what a lovely dress!’ that’s all. Sometimes I just try to diffuse a situation with a stressed parent and small child.

I can imagine a child desperate to wear a totally impractical dress for an outing and the parent regretting it (maybe it had been bought for an event or was a present and they were keep to make it last more than one wear).

I remember mum making me and my sister wear some ruffly flouncey dresses (which we called ‘victorian maid’ dresses - as was they fashion of the day) to a church doo. We ran off to play - I ripped mine climbing a tree and my sister caught hers jumping over a fence. We came back filthy, hair like we’d fallen out of a tree (well, duh) with the helms of the dresses hanging off.

Why is this not everyone’s business?

Don't be absurd.

Of course you shouldn't have said anything. Fair enough if she had hit the kid or something but for telling her off? Mind your own business!

@BoredZelda

We end up trying to u do the damage with these girls sitting in front of us in the classroom, eventually, but by secondary school it can be very deeply ingrained

Careful you don’t hurt yourself with that massive stretch.

Casual sexism, misogyny comes from so many places. A wee girl being told not to get her dress dirty is not it. She could have been on her way to a party or something and getting in a mess was not an option. Judging someone on a small snapshot is ridiculous.

And not to mention the sexist description from op about the girl skipping with pleasure whilst brother leaps about like a show jumper.