AIBU to ask neighbours to keep kids off trampoline in working hours?

[PineappleMojito]

Not really for me, for my DP who is WFH. I don’t WFH so this doesn’t impact but he is very bothered by it.

Next door recently bought a trampoline for their two kids. When they go on it, they’re really noisy - they scream and shout a lot, I’ve heard them on the weekends when I’m home and it is loud. DP is hearing impaired, he’s on work Zoom calls during the day and the noise is making it difficult to do his calls. One is a pre schooler and the other we think might be home at the moment because school bubble has burst. Obviously he is used to general neighbour noise during day, but he finds the screaming and shouting difficult as it’s right next to our fence. He’s using noise cancelling headphones for calls, but even with those it’s getting through and making it hard for him to concentrate and hear what’s being said.

Would he BU to ask them if they could keep the kids off the trampoline during his work hours or confine it to lunch time during the week? He has an hour break where he’d be fine with them using it, he normally goes out to walk the dog. They’re very nice neighbours and we’ve never had any issues, but he’s afraid to rock the boat.

Yabu and cant ask children not to play in their own garden. You sign up for some noise op when you live next to others.

Can your dh work in a different part of your house?

@RandomHomoSapien you sound delightful

[quote Popcornbetty]@RandomHomoSapien you sound delightful [/quote]
I actually thought @RandomHomoSapien was the first person to speak some sense on this forum.

@Letthefunandgamesstart well then having a normal conversation at normal talking volume wouldn't be a reason to complain? And whoever was complaining would be unreasonable. By unsociable hours I mean the council noise complaint times of 11pm-7am. I do work nights, I can't ask my neighbours not to do their extremley loud DIY work during the day though and that makes my flat vibrate, and I have noise sensitivities. I have to put up with that unfortunately, as does the OP.

I actually don't think people are being 'as ridiculous as possible' or that sterotyping women as 'bored housewives' is constructive in the slightist; maybe leave that archaic view in the 1920's! I actually think telling children they can't play in their own garden between the next door neighbours working hours is what is ansolutely bonkers. A polite word over screaming (if they are doing this continulously 5 days a week which i find hard to believe) is another thing entirely!

b*

Apologies is I've missed it, but are your windows open? I only ask because I live on a busy road and have to keep the windows shut when I'm on calls...

If they are, YBVVU, if they're not you just need to move elsewhere in this house however not ideal that might be. We're working from home in a pandemic, very little of life is currently ideal!

I recently had all dc isolating at home and I was really conscious of how many neighbours were being impacted trying to work from home with my lot playing all day every day in the garden (as well as dh and I ).

However, once we were a few days in and all going slightly mad, I encouraged them to exercise on the trampoline and play in the garden because they were not doing enough during the day to feel tired in the eve, they weren't sleeping well and we were all going a bit mad being cooped up.

If they have a child isolating and are restricted from going to their usual places and doing their usual activities, then you may just have to grin and bear it. The negative impacts of isolation on young children are hard to witness first hand and really upset me. At the point I could see how it was affecting my DC, my concerns about the neighbours trying to work became secondary. Your neighbour may be well aware of the conflict but feeling quite trapped.

Life is hard for everyone at the moment. We're all trying to juggle things we didn't used to have to, in less than ideal circumstances.

I bet the poor couple next door are struggling too with their little kids during a pandemic.

90% of voters think you are being unreasonable. And even bored housewives can have a valid opinion.
OP - your approach that you can do anything until somebody complains and only then will you think about changing your behaviour is pretty grim. Most people's idea of being a good neighbour is to avoid pissing people off in the first place.

He needs to invest in noise cancelling headphones or move rooms. You cannot prevent your neighbours kids from using their garden.

@PineappleMojito

Your neighbours annoy you, but for all you know, your weed smoking bothers them (it would bother me and I'd be too nervous to ever say anything)

Well you don’t ask, you don’t get in this life. I’m one of life’s fairly direct people, (probably comes from being neurodiverse I guess). If they never say it bothers them, then nothing gets done about it. And we would do things differently if someone said anything. We try to be considerate now, and it sure isn’t all day every day, but if it really did upset someone I’d really try my best to accommodate their needs.

If it bothers you and you won’t say and just seethe quietly, IMO that’s unhealthy and breeds resentment and further issues (unless of course your neighbours are known to be aggressive or something, but we are definitely far from it as are our NDNs!) That’s why I wanted to help my DP navigate this and tackle it in a timely and reasonable way (including adaptation on his side too which might be needed) rather than just seething at home and getting more and more mad about it, that’s just not productive. And if he decides to do nothing about it, then he’ll have to STFU about it in that case!

Just out of curiosity

If someone said I’m sorry. It REALLY bothers us

What would you do to help the matter? What would your compromise be for that? Would you stop it altogether?

@Thevoiceofreason2021

He needs to invest in noise cancelling headphones or move rooms. You cannot prevent your neighbours kids from using their garden.

It says in the opening post "He’s using noise cancelling headphones for calls, but even with those it’s getting through and making it hard for him to concentrate and hear what’s being said."

@RandomHomoSapien

Obviously you’re not going to get any sensible, intelligent or helpful responses on AIBU, it’s a forum for the bored housewife to let off some steam by being as contrary and ridiculous as possible, but of course screaming isn’t on any ANY time of the day. My children know that screeching and screaming are not allowed and don’t do it.

Have a word with the neighbours and ask them politely if their delightful brats can tone down the feral behaviour. Obviously put it a bit nicer than that. Good luck

Absolutely agree with this 100%. Of course you can ask for a bit of quiet during working hours as we are in a bloomin pandemic and a lot of people have absolutely no choice to work from home. Everyone needs to work together and be considerate of each other through this.

From a legal standpoint

If your neighbour refuses. And it’s not on the convenance. Or in the leasehold. There isn’t much you can do. It’s their own property. In daylight hours.

If it was happening over a period of 3 months. You might have a noise complaint. But we all know how well they go down.

think we should all realise too that lot of us are not being given a choice whether we want to go back in to the office or not yet, so our houses are offices whether we like it or not! If we could just all be a little more understanding about the shit covid has left us ALL in for whatever reason we might all be a bit less unhappy.

@longwayoff

Send hubbikins to the library, school holidays from Friday. 6 weeks of joy for you and Mr CF.

Nice

From the sounds of things he needs to upgrade the noise cancelling headphones. I have Sony XM4s and I can't really hear anything if I'm sat at my desk. You can adjust the settings so that as he walks around they let some filter noise through (for example if going for a walk) or conplete noise cancellation when still.

Another good option I've seen recommended are Bose 700s.

I appreciate they are expensive (around £225) but they are a fantastic investment.

he needs to buy a good quality noise cancelling headset
he should also move rooms if possible.
NO WAY in this world should he go ask the neighbours to keep the kids off the trampoline.

Also he could actually go into work. I have gone back to hybrid working as I prefer it.

Very unreasonable. You can't ask them that. If anything that maybe the kids could keep the noise down but again they are kids they tend to be quit noisy sometimes 🙈

You can't ask them to stop bouncing but it's perfectly reasonable to ask them to stop screaming. He's working. He needs to concentrate. They need to learn a bit of self control and empathy.

He's working. He needs to concentrate

He can work from his bedroom like thousands of other people.