AIBU to ask neighbours to keep kids off trampoline in working hours?

[PineappleMojito]

Not really for me, for my DP who is WFH. I don’t WFH so this doesn’t impact but he is very bothered by it.

Next door recently bought a trampoline for their two kids. When they go on it, they’re really noisy - they scream and shout a lot, I’ve heard them on the weekends when I’m home and it is loud. DP is hearing impaired, he’s on work Zoom calls during the day and the noise is making it difficult to do his calls. One is a pre schooler and the other we think might be home at the moment because school bubble has burst. Obviously he is used to general neighbour noise during day, but he finds the screaming and shouting difficult as it’s right next to our fence. He’s using noise cancelling headphones for calls, but even with those it’s getting through and making it hard for him to concentrate and hear what’s being said.

Would he BU to ask them if they could keep the kids off the trampoline during his work hours or confine it to lunch time during the week? He has an hour break where he’d be fine with them using it, he normally goes out to walk the dog. They’re very nice neighbours and we’ve never had any issues, but he’s afraid to rock the boat.

@PineappleMojito

We all know that if she goes through council channels she won’t get anywhere. Children playing in the daytime is normal, expected residential noise

Nobody is going to the council. Nor has it ever been suggested that we would.

Well yes, it would be a total waste of your time as absolutely no grounds for a complaint

@Billandben444

It's got nothing to do with the trampoline. It's got nothing to do with wfh. It's got everything to do with the screaming and the shouting. Presumably sitting in your garden is a nightmare because of it and perhaps for other neighbours as well. Hopefully the craft beer do the trick and he comes back a happy bunny!

We mind less when it’s the weekend/evening. Or I do anyway. I work until 8pm Mon-Weds so I rarely deal with it in the week. On weekends we go out if the volume ramps up, as definitely feels unreasonable on weekends to restrict in any way. No idea if neighbours on other side feel differently though. They sit out more than we do.

But yes, you’re right - it’s the screaming and shouting - and the time it’s going on for.

I am not trying to offend anyone by asking the question (as mentioned earlier my mum is profoundly deaf so I understand how life affecting it can be) surely there is some technology that allows his hearing aids to connect to his phone through Bluetooth so that the microphone that takes in background noise is switched off for the period of the call?

Like if it is in fact his hearing aids that is causing the screaming noise to be played directly into his hear making it completely unbearable..could he remove the hearing aid and have an in ear noise cancelling headphone so all he would hear was the call rather than any background noise? I believe the ship has sailed and he is talking to the parents but if his hearing aids are so sensitive he cannot stand the noise of you making coffee do they need to be adjusted at the audiology clinic?

You would normally be in your place of work. The children are playing in their garden . YABU. This is why workplaces need to get back to some sort of normality

OP - anything your NDN do for you about this would not be a COMPROMISE - it would be a FAVOUR.

You would do well to remember that in any dealing with them. They would be doing you a favour. And before you ask them you should do all you can to address the issues on your side - such as get your DP out of WFH and into the office. Or work from them bedroom.

Your DP is not entitled to the perfect office set-up facilitated by your neighbours, disability or not.

I'm sorry but I agree Yabu.
It's their home too and it's the school holidays. We have had kids locked down all over winter and it's the right thing for kids to be outside playing.
Could he potentially move his office to somewhere further away from the fence, or even move back to the office?
I get it must be annoying and frustrating for him but there are downsides to home working.

@wordsareveryunnecessary

You would normally be in your place of work. The children are playing in their garden . YABU. This is why workplaces need to get back to some sort of normality

Agreed. Many places though, like his workplace, have sold off buildings and now won’t go back to full office capacity at all. It’s a pain. I’m glad I’m not in his position tbh. But hopefully he’ll be back maybe 3 days by January next year.

Rather than asking them to keep the kids off the trampoline, just ask if they can possibly not scream and shout so much?

Could triple glazing the windows help plus curtains to damp the sound? or work providing funding for doing work to allow some calls in the bedroom? Everyone is different. I work from the bedroom most days, but someone with a bad back may find it hard. I think it is the company’s responsibility to give people a safe working environment.

Most reasonable people won’t mind asking their kids to tone it down, but I think stopping them playing on trampoline during work hours is a bit excessive.

We went past a group of half a dozen kids having a screech today, and I commented that they were fortunate they weren't mine, because personally, I can suffer that for about five minutes, and then they'll be told to keep the bloody noise down. Kids being kids, doesn't need to mean anti-social levels of noise, they do need to learn to consider others, and keep the noise down in built up areas.

Yes YABVU. Don't ask.

The chat has gone ok. The dad was receptive to being mindful of noise levels in work hours and he’s said to DP to just WhatsApp him if he’s on an important call and he’ll make sure they don’t start screaming outside. In return DP will keep him supplied with home brew to maintain good relations, as yes, he does recognise they could have said no and given him the finger, as many on here no doubt would have done. Good result I’d say.

DP does still need to talk to work though, as relying on neighbour goodwill is not a long term solution. I recognise that DP’s reaction to this is a sign of him being a bit frayed and I think it would help him a lot even if he could return to the office 1-2 days a week. I think his hearing issues may be getting worse as well as he’s complaining of tinnitus and it may be that his hearing aid is no longer fit for purpose and he needs a more sophisticated one that does more than just amplify. So he does need to take responsibility there too, he hadn’t wanted to push it with the lack of regular appointments during Covid as he knows how stretched the NHS are - I do contract/locum work and waiting lists are beyond the pale. But assertiveness is warranted here if his symptoms aren’t under control, he needs to be more on top of it.

Thanks to all those who have provided useful and balanced input here as I think it helped to know his original idea for a solution was too much of an imposition and it’s helped him think about other things. I think he got quite hyper fixated on it and just wanted it to stop, but he does see now that it’s not possible or reasonable to totally eliminate it.

Wow. Just wow.

That's a great outcome!

You would sound like a total fruit loop to ask this. I would laugh very loudly at such an entitled request. Ridiculous!

The children are in their own garden playing. The fact that your dh is working from home and is trying to replicate an office / work environment is not their problem. It would be very unreasonable to ask them to stop playing during the day. Maybe your dh needs to go back to the office or get better glazing. It is the summer months and the school holidays.

OP, I’m glad the chat went well. I think you and your DH have been reasonable. I hope the screeching calms down.

I think yabu. I would move to work in a room at the front of the house and keeps windows, doors shut and use a fan instead if he can manage. You can't expect not to have to deal with normal noise during daylight hours, kids screaming, dogs barking can all be very annoying but as long as its not at unsociable hours I don't think you can really do anything.

I'm glad your DH went and had a chat and that it went so well.

As a solution has now been reached, I’m now leaving this thread alone. Some people have been helpful, I’m thankful for those responses and as I said above yes, DP does realise now his original idea was unreasonable. However I no longer wish to read comments calling us “fruit loops” and “mental” as that’s just toxic. Both of us have had MH issues in the past so that’s not what I need to be reading now we’ve figured out a sensible way forward.

“I don't know why people allow their brats to shriek all day it's bloody selfish.
When I was bringing up mine they had to keep the noise reasonable i.e no shrieking as we lived in a built up area in a terraced house.
If they needed to let off steam and run and shout I'd take them down to the park for a few hours to get it out of their system.
Otherwise they never learn to respect other peoples space and grow up to be considerate human beings.
A lot of people are too lazy to take their children to the park or teach them to behave considerately, they think they and their children can behave like savages all day and to hell with anyone else”

Did read OP? They can’t go to the park if they’re isolating (or the eldest child is). They’d usually be in school or childcare anyway and the fact that they’re not is probably why they are shrieking and being loud. Did you also have a pandemic when you were bringing yours up?

OP if you live in South Manchester and the noise started last Tuesday I can only apologise

@Blossomtoes if you read my post you’ll see I actually said there is nothing wrong with children playing in their own garden.

BUT there is a difference between playing, laughing, chatting etc and very loud shouting and shrieking. Can you really not see the difference?

Children should be taught that their actions affect others.

@StorminaBcup no child needs to shriek to have fun. They’re doing it because they get away with it and parents don’t bat an eyelid.

It’s 10pm and I’m currently listening to my neighbours kids aged 10 and 11, so old enough to know better. High pitch screaming and yelling. Iv had to shut my window and it’s boiling. The parents are just rude if they think that’s acceptable. During the day yes, no probs but this time it’s a big no

@Pinkandpink

It’s 10pm and I’m currently listening to my neighbours kids aged 10 and 11, so old enough to know better. High pitch screaming and yelling. Iv had to shut my window and it’s boiling. The parents are just rude if they think that’s acceptable. During the day yes, no probs but this time it’s a big no

But OP wants outside office hours!