AIBU to ask neighbours to keep kids off trampoline in working hours?

[PineappleMojito]

Not really for me, for my DP who is WFH. I don’t WFH so this doesn’t impact but he is very bothered by it.

Next door recently bought a trampoline for their two kids. When they go on it, they’re really noisy - they scream and shout a lot, I’ve heard them on the weekends when I’m home and it is loud. DP is hearing impaired, he’s on work Zoom calls during the day and the noise is making it difficult to do his calls. One is a pre schooler and the other we think might be home at the moment because school bubble has burst. Obviously he is used to general neighbour noise during day, but he finds the screaming and shouting difficult as it’s right next to our fence. He’s using noise cancelling headphones for calls, but even with those it’s getting through and making it hard for him to concentrate and hear what’s being said.

Would he BU to ask them if they could keep the kids off the trampoline during his work hours or confine it to lunch time during the week? He has an hour break where he’d be fine with them using it, he normally goes out to walk the dog. They’re very nice neighbours and we’ve never had any issues, but he’s afraid to rock the boat.

@Gentleness

I think it is normal to ask your children to not shriek a lot. There's children noise and there's shrieking. If someone mentioned to me that my kids were shrieking a lot, I would take some action - not to spoil their fun, but I would ask them to be considerate of other people. My DH works from home and we homeschool, so they understand what he experiences when someone decides to play loud music or there's a lot of machine noise going on. It's not about anyone having the right to ask you to stop. It's about being considerate within your community.

Oh the other hand, my grumpy neighbour threatens my children with drowning because he reckons they throw buckets of water through the privet hedge and it soaks him. In reality they play with the tiniest water pistols possible, make sure they don't aim them over the 6+ foot hedge or into the 2 foot wide hedge that he has cut right back to the boundary on his side (his hedge) leaving us to maintain it at any thickness by sacrificing part our garden, and they know not to irritate grumpy neighbour because it upsets them when he yells at them. He sits outside right next to the hedge whenever the weather allows it and eats every meal outside. I have told my kids they can have as much as they like in the garden and as long as they are reasonably considerate, I have their back. Rant over.

Threatens them with drowning? I hope that's a joke. If anyone said that to any of mine, they certainly wouldn't be doing it again.

My DD wears hearing aids as does my ex husband so I'm very sympathetic to your husbands issues. I also full time from home with or without the pandemic and live opposite a busy pub and park. It can be pretty noisy and I have to shut the windows sometimes. If it gets very noisy in my office at the front my laptop and I decamp to the back of the house. The joy of a laptop and a headset is the portability.
I think you'd be very unreasonable to ask neighbours kids not to use the trampoline during the day. Here the summer holidays start next week so I'm expecting a ramp up in the noise over the road but nothing I can do about it.
Try heavy curtains to reduce noise, look into a better headset and get your husband to change rooms now and then.

Ahh Op committed the cardinal sin of smoking weed. FFS. It's nothing to do with the question.

OP - it's unfortunate that for your DP his hearing is making this much more difficult. I don't think you'd be out of order to ask if they can try and keep the screaming to a minimum, but you can't ask them not to use it or dictate when they can. I WFH full time and that's just part of the situation you have to take into account when you do, that neighbour noise may be an issue.

Whilst I sympathise, I think you ABU I'm afraid. Is this a temporary WFH arrangement? I think if it's only for another couple of weeks you could maybe have a polite word and explain, but if it's a permanent arrangement I think the headphone suggestion is the way forward, they should be able to use their garden as they wish really.

Ahh Op committed the cardinal sin of smoking weed. FFS. It's nothing to do with the question.

It absolutely does when she is bitching about antisocial behaviour from her neighbours when she herself is participating is antisocial and ILLEGAL behaviour.

@theemmadilemma

Ahh Op committed the cardinal sin of smoking weed. FFS. It's nothing to do with the question.

OP - it's unfortunate that for your DP his hearing is making this much more difficult. I don't think you'd be out of order to ask if they can try and keep the screaming to a minimum, but you can't ask them not to use it or dictate when they can. I WFH full time and that's just part of the situation you have to take into account when you do, that neighbour noise may be an issue.

Nope, the weed smoking is entirely relevant in a discussion about reasonable expectations of behaviour from neignbours. It actually couldn't be more pertinent.

You are crazy you can’t tell people what to do in their own gardens during the day geez

It’s the summer holidays - FFS.

Look, if this was all day every day then yes difficult. But you’ve said he could work in the bedroom so he should do that for the summer.

It is his issue so he should put himself out.

Move to the bedroom - it is just temporary over the holidays.

Given he's had noise issues at both the front and back of the house he needs to get a proper headset that will help.

I work from home and have lots of noise interruptions from neighbours cutting down trees, constantly slamming doors and mowing the lawn. I'm across the road from a school and the kids' noise doesn't bother me anywhere near as much as the adult neighbours. I wouldn't dream of asking them to keep the noise down. They're living their lives in the houses they've paid for. Have you considered noise deadening panels?

Yes you would be unreasonable, Jesus Christ

Unfortunately you are being unreasonable but I have full sympathy. I have neighbours on either side with shrieking kids on trampolines and while it is super irritating there’s nothing I can do because I know it would be unfair. I do however wish there was a cutoff time. I was still listening to them screaming at 930pm last night. I use white noise in the house to block the sound. Would that work for your husband if he’s finding the noise cancelling headphones aren’t helping?

Plus it’s too much of an inconvenience for your husband to work from your bedroom. But you expect your neighbours to keep the kids in all day like caged animals and allow them the use of their garden for an hour your husband gets to decide. Said yourself you think the kids bubble has burst so no doubt they can’t even leave the house. Honestly cheeky fuckery .

My kids have a trampoline and they can get a bit too excited and noisy on it so I do have to go out occasionally and get them to be a bit more quiet.
Go and talk to them, I think it's very unreasonable to ask them not to play on it during work hours but there is no harm in asking them if they can limit the screaming. I certainly wouldn't mind.

Sorry, but you can't dictate how people play in their own gardens. It's only going to get worse with the summer holidays coming up.

What time does it start normally? Can your partner start super early and work flexibility so he can work in peace?

He should go and rent some office space somewhere if he doesn't have a suitable base at home. People don't have to pussy around your family. Its summer; kids should be outside playing.

YABU.

Of course YABU. Homes and gardens are for living, not for working - though I know of course plenty of people have had to make do over the pandemic. Can he not move to another room in the house? I refuse to believe that there is no solution to this.

@theemmadilemma

Ahh Op committed the cardinal sin of smoking weed. FFS. It's nothing to do with the question.

OP - it's unfortunate that for your DP his hearing is making this much more difficult. I don't think you'd be out of order to ask if they can try and keep the screaming to a minimum, but you can't ask them not to use it or dictate when they can. I WFH full time and that's just part of the situation you have to take into account when you do, that neighbour noise may be an issue.

Haha of course it does, it's antisocial as well. Not everyone likes the smell of weed so therefore it becomes antisocial. Not everyone likes kids screaming, again antisocial. Both completely relevant to this discussion when OP is acting like the neighbours are antisocial but doesn't seem to want to acknowledge their antisocial behaviour.

Forgive me if this has been suggested before but is his headset one with noise cancelling earphones? The difference they made to me in my shared office is astonishing.

Employers are going to need to address these matters. It is not suitable for everyone to work from home full time. This is his employers issue - they are not providing a suitable workspace for him. They need to let him back into the office in an exception basis.

Surely there’s a difference between normal children playing noise and shrieking. We have neighbours that shriek. It’s ear splitting and goes right through you. We haven’t said anything as the parents are quite intimidating but the shrieking is driving us mad.

Work in the bedroom. Loads of people have to. I do, and when I am on calls I see lots of other people doing the same.

If he can’t go back and work in his office is there a friend or family member you could ‘rent’ a room from during office hours for the next 6 weeks? If you know of someone who is out at work all day maybe he could negotiate something? It’s not ideal and really you’d think his place of work would be more understanding if he can’t work successfully from home 🤷‍♀️

I absolutely agree with other posters though, it’s not your Neighbours problem that your husband is working from home.

This is an issue for your husband’s employer to deal with before your neighbour. If they are not opening the office despite current guidance, then he should absolutely ask to be able to expense a we work / desk hire fee. It is not his responsibility to provide his employers with appropriate working space at home; everyone has muddled through as well as possible with some goodwill in each side but at this stage, the employer has the ability and discretion to provide a work environment. The “place of work” clause in an employment agreement works both ways.