AIBU to think that when offering seconds at dinner...

[ElevenBenevolentElephants]

and the host has plated it up and served it, and then at the end, they shouldn't word it: there's more xxx, if anyone can manage any more?"

but more like: "there's more xxx, would anyone like some?"

reason why i think it is U? because the first one is implying that "how could anyone possibly manage any more dinner after this plate of food? only fat bastards that's who "

It wouldn't bother me at all.

Does it matter? You either want seconds or you don’t.

You are being weird.

Unless there's a back story here, I wouldn't think anything of it. They've cooked, they're offering more. Presumably all friends/family so wouldn't occur to me to read anything more into the wording used

I think if you have a problem with your weight you'll read into things like this when they're not meant... she says, as a person who does exactly what!

Eh. Total non issue

If anything, I would interpret this a giving guests a ready made excuse not to want any more, namely being full. But more likely I wouldn’t think anything of it at all

Oh dear god not another weird thread. Something in the water today.

I think you’re reading waaaaaay too much into a throwaway comment TBH.

Wouldn’t bother me in the slightest - I think you are very much overthinking this.

I’d mean this as a recognition that I’d dished out quite large portions and wasn’t expecting anyone to feel obliged to ask for more or would be disappointed if they didn’t ask! But I’d serve up seconds with pleasure (it’s a compliment after all).

You’re defo over thinking this op.

It's what's always been said in my family, from my great gran down, but no one has any issues about how much anyone else eats. A "healthy" appetite is seen as a good thing, in fact not being able to manage any more would be seen as a flaw more than managing more would be.

Actually, that raises an interesting point, because food, mealtimes and eating together are a hugely important part of life in my family, but no one is over weight and no one is ever on a diet. Eating is encouraged, but not, it seems, overdone. Or maybe we just have lucky genes

I think overthinking it. If someone has a weight problem I can slightly understand why they'd feel like that though

Are you the same person as the dirty bum one and the entirely inoffensive colleague leaving?

I can’t say I’ve ever given a thought to how an offer of more dinner is worded.
If it was ‘if any fat bastard wants to shovel some more food into their mouths their is more available’ then I’d maybe see your point.
Generally, if a host has fed me, served me food and offered me seconds, my only response would be ‘thank you very much’.

Did you want more but felt offended by the host's phrasing of the offer? The way they worded it was fine. Taking offence seems like a deflection from other issues closer to home.

And yes, easier to say no thanks to could you manage more - no you've fed me adequately thanks, than would you like more - no I didn't like it.

I'd be paranoid having you over for dinner to be honest if you over analyse everything like that

As my 12yo dd would say: "this sounds like a you problem'

I don't think this is a problem at all.

Don't over think it.

oh.. It's me then LOL hands up, I'm unreasonable :D :D :D

What a weird thing to overthink and then start a thread about.

There's nothing implying what you think. It's just "if you're not full, have another helping".

It's kind of them to cook for you. It's extra kind of them to offer a second helping. Ask for a tiny bit as it's so delicious.

Nope. It allows people to say “oh I’m too full thanks” rather than feeling bad for saying “no I don’t want any”.