AIBU to think that when offering seconds at dinner...

[ElevenBenevolentElephants]

and the host has plated it up and served it, and then at the end, they shouldn't word it: there's more xxx, if anyone can manage any more?"

but more like: "there's more xxx, would anyone like some?"

reason why i think it is U? because the first one is implying that "how could anyone possibly manage any more dinner after this plate of food? only fat bastards that's who "

The hint is in “ if anyone can manage it”. They are saving it for tomorrow

It's just a phrase in common use. If someone hasn't said 'hey fatty, can you cram a bit more in? I made extra as I knew you were coming' then stop taking it personally.

When I read your OP I thought you were going to come to the opposite conclusion: that "can anyone manage any more?" would be pushing people to accept and over-eat out of politeness if they can possibly "manage" more, rather than genuinely wanting more.^^ Your interpretation of the question didn't occur to me at all until you explained it. And if somebody simply phrased it in this way - without me analysing a thread about it - I wouldn't even have noticed the wording difference between the two phrases because what is being communicated seems identical: "does anybody want seconds?".

Why do you think you've read some kind of slight into something so trivial?

The wording wouldn’t bother me.
I hate anyone ‘plating up’ for me, though. Guests should be able to help themselves, at least to veg, potatoes, rice, etc.. (Greedy buggers who are always going to take more than their fair share are obviously excluded.)

You may not be being unreasonable, but you are being very nit-picky, and probably overthinking the intent of the comment...unless, as one poster said, there is a backstory here that we don't know about. I wouldn't give it a second thought.

MN is just one big food issue

I think ‘if anyone can manage any more’ is implying they are stuffed and can’t and are assuming no one else is.

But I wonder if you are totally over thinking this and neither one is U… U would be ‘would anyone like any more?’

YABU, it’s just a turn of phrase.

YABVU and clearly have weird food issues. Just be grateful someone took the trouble to invite you to dinner at all.