Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Rigid school uniforms

688 replies

Waitrosedisaster · 09/07/2021 15:44

I've just had the usual letter from my child's secondary school, where it outlines all the dos and don'ts surrounding school uniform for the next academic year.

Is anyone just absolutely sick of the outdated concept of strict uniforms? The nitty gritty details of 'only black or brown hair bobbles', 'no bows on socks', 'all clothes including p.e kit must have the school logo'. Why? Just why? My personal favourite this year is the following 'any piercing other than single lobe piercings will be removed immediately, regardless of when piercing was obtained'. Also, nail varnish and shellac will also be removed immediately? Wtf?

School uniforms (other than being used as a money making scheme) were originally used for purposes not to dissimilar from uniforms for prisons, or mental health units. They were used to strip away a person's individuality and make them more likely to conform and obey as they are effectively 'uniform'. It's such an outdated concept and I find it bizarre that schools are able to even dictate which (overpriced) shops the uniform must come from.

I hear arguments from teacher friends about how uniforms are better for low income families, but are they really? Unless the parents do not work, are they even able to claim money off uniforms?

Anyone else agree?

OP posts:
warmfluffytowels · 10/07/2021 18:28

Expecting shorts until year 6 doesn’t seem like a huge deal at all to me

So would you be happy to wear short, cheap, flimsy polyester shorts in minus temperatures in December? Besides, if girls are allowed to wear woollen tights or trousers in winter, boys should be allowed the choice of trousers too.

It was common practice only a few decades ago, and is clearly a tradition that this particular school has chosen to keep. I suspect it is also no coincidence that many of the most prestigious prep schools still have this expectation in place.

One of the best schools in this country doesn't even have a uniform (St Pauls School for Girls). The only restriction is "no stilettos".

Why would boys wearing shorts aged 7 make any difference to anyone's educational attainment?

Aria999 · 10/07/2021 18:30

In some countries boys must have their hair shaved to a crew cut for school. Do you think that helps them learn?

I'm in the anti uniform camp but I would guess this particular one is to help them not get fleas?

zyd32 · 10/07/2021 19:56

Different things matter to different parents. My kids have had to wear shorts, have very strict uniform rules, limited set of haircuts and comply with numerous other school rules. In the wider scheme of things, uniform doesn't exercise me at all, like it obviously does to other parents.

Buy the uniform (second hand if needed), wear it, job done. I wouldn't encourage my kids to push the boundaries of what's deemed a school trouser or leggings because it's unnecessary and not fair on staff. Complying with school rules is part of kids learning to be respectful.

Dishwashersaurous · 10/07/2021 19:58

Of course school children shouldn't be wearing nail varnish

MyDcAreMarvel · 10/07/2021 19:59

Of course school children shouldn't be wearing nail varnish because??

Dishwashersaurous · 10/07/2021 20:01

They are children.

dementedpixie · 10/07/2021 20:03

I don't see an issue with nail polish

MyDcAreMarvel · 10/07/2021 20:14

@Dishwashersaurous They are children. nope still lost me. Did you maybe mix up nail varnish and tattoos?

Dishwashersaurous · 10/07/2021 20:20

OK we will have to disagree

00100001 · 10/07/2021 20:24

@Dishwashersaurous

They are children.
Your kids will never wear nail polish until they're 18?? Confused
warmfluffytowels · 10/07/2021 20:24

@Dishwashersaurous

Of course school children shouldn't be wearing nail varnish
Why? Will it make their fingers fall off?
00100001 · 10/07/2021 20:26

Boys and girls wearing polish occasionally is the same thing as them having a mad hair day, or wearing face paint or dressing up in fancy dress, presumably you have no qualms with those activities?? Confused

Dishwashersaurous · 10/07/2021 20:46

Not at school. It's just a distraction

dementedpixie · 10/07/2021 20:50

Distracts from what?
My dd wears nail polish and still managed to pass her exams and is heading off to Uni after the summer

warmfluffytowels · 10/07/2021 20:57

@Dishwashersaurous

Not at school. It's just a distraction
lol, what are you talking about?

How is nail polish distracting?

SmokeyDevil · 10/07/2021 21:08

I think school uniform is pointless.

Kids will always compare stuff. If you don't have them comparing clothes (which they will anyway regardless if they are wearing them at the time or not, they will mention their new trainers or bag etc), then they will compare phones, laptops, tablets etc. They will do it regardless, and a kid that comes from a low income house still struggles with that, might do more if they end up in secondhand uniform.

Also, if a kid is a brat and has been taught no manners from their parents, a uniform isn't going to magically transform them into a decent human being. They will still be a brat, they will still bully, they will be one of the ones bullying the poor kids on not having the latest iPhone or trainers. They will still be assholes, just in black and white.

Not every job has a uniform, and you go into that job knowing that's a requirement if you choose that line of work. You aren't forced. It's your choice. The kids don't have a choice in this, you are forcing them and they have to go to school. Why not at least let them be comfortable? Probably find they are a bit happier then to go to school, I know dress down days at mine people tended to be happier.

Brefugee · 10/07/2021 21:10

Bloody Norah are you still doing the shorts thing?ridiculous

Don't be ridiculous OP. Teenagers would be wearing no end of outrageous outfits for school, because it's what teens do. They push boundaries so if you remove boundaries (uniforms) classes would

Don't be daft. Schools in Germany don't have uniforms but they do have a dress code. For eg no strappy tops - tops had to have sleeves. (so regular t-shirts were ok). Skirts had to be within a few cms (can't remember) of the knee. etc etc.

The reality? they wore jeans and t-shirts and hoodies and in the summer they exchanged the jeans for shorts (short-shorts not allowed). And the sun still rose every day, and the earth kept on turning.

SmileEachDay · 10/07/2021 21:13

I don't see an issue with nail polish

Ok, so lets look at that. What about these:

Rigid school uniforms
dementedpixie · 10/07/2021 21:13

That's not nail polish
That's false nails

SmileEachDay · 10/07/2021 21:29

That's not nail polish
That's false nails

Ok. So then the rule is “No false nails”?

What about these?

Rigid school uniforms
dementedpixie · 10/07/2021 21:31

I didn't say there was a no false nails rule. I just disputed that the picture you showed was nail polish. I dont really care what's on their nails tbh

StrangeToSee · 10/07/2021 21:53

My kids have had to wear shorts, have very strict uniform rules, limited set of haircuts

Buy the uniform (second hand if needed), wear it, job done. I wouldn't encourage my kids to push the boundaries of what's deemed a school trouser or leggings because it's unnecessary and not fair on staff. Complying with school rules is part of kids learning to be respectful.

I’d rather my children were warm and comfortable than shivering with cold because the rule states shorts must be worn in winter! Why teach kids to passively and obediently follow an outdated rule set?

I openly tell my infant DC I disagree with the rule about button up shirts, ties and formal trousers (when they moan about them) but I add it’s a school rule so we have to try and comply whilst adapting it as best we can. Adapting for us means trying to make their uniform as comfortable and weather appropriate as we can get away with. It means buying my daughter black leather shoes with the ‘wrong’ colour sole because these are the best fit. And backing her up when the teacher complains. Why is that unfair on staff? Do yellow soles impede learning or cause staff distress?

My priority is not what the staff think, but that my children are warm, comfortable and focused on learning. If that means buying thermal fleece-lined jeggings for mid winter so be it. If it means letting them keep their top button undone and their tie loose who is it hurting? They comply with normal schools rules and are both respectful and academic.

If I forced them to have bare legs in winter, badly fitting shoes, a tight top button and tie, or trousers that failed to keep them warm I’m sure they’d be less focused on studying and more fidgety, and may lose interest in learning at school. Why make kids uncomfortable or cold for the sake of an old tradition?

Hair styles: fair enough, as long hair increases the risk of lice and getting caught playing, so both mine have it short or plaited.

StrangeToSee · 10/07/2021 21:57

As for nails, I don’t see the issue with clear nail polish in high school. As long as nails are short and clean what’s the issue?

Long false nails or gel/acrylic extensions are obviously a safety hazard so I agree with banning those.

tsmainsqueeze · 10/07/2021 21:58

I can see the point of a basic affordable for all uniform , but i absolutely loathe the ridiculous attitudes and rigid rules some schools adhere too.
My daughters school are obsessed with trouser fabric and tightness something i can not possibly consider getting worked up about .
I see the point of sensible shoes and short nails but what the hell does it matter if the shoes have a discreet label or the nails have a colour ?
There are so many more important issues in a school to be concerned about main one i imagine is getting a kid to engage with education , schools should choose their battles.
Growing up is all about finding your style , your tribe etc schools might be better off embracing that.
And as for equalising we all know that kids , sadly ,easily work out who has less .

00100001 · 10/07/2021 22:07

@Dishwashersaurous

Not at school. It's just a distraction
So, your kids obviously only go to school in uniform, and never partake in home clothes days/charity dress up days etc?

Because obviously if green nails are a distraction, then kids in spotty clothes is just as distracting...?