To be offended by people asking if I’m ‘still breastfeeding’

[firstbabyworries]

Just that. I’m so fed up and to be quite honest pretty offended that people think it’s acceptable to ask such a personal question.
Last month I overheard my mum asking my husband, which I found pretty rude, condsidering she could have asked me herself(although I would have said it’s non of her business) then tonight MIL asked DH if I was still breastfeeding. What business is it of anyone’s?!
I’ve now told him to tell people to mind there own business.

Did you really just compare breastfeeding to sex?
Is this because the topic ‘breastfeeding’ alludes to your breasts and your breasts are a private body part? I’ve never known anyone think of it this way. Breastfeeding is about feeding your child, people aren’t actually thinking about and picturing your breasts when they talk to to you about it

Maybe they're asking because there aren't really that many things you can ask about a 5 month old other than how they are eating and sleeping.

Your analogy with an old couple having sex is totally ridiculous.

Its a bit odd to be offended by someone asking whether you're still breastfeeding, given its not exactly a secret is it? I see my friends feed their babies all the time.

I also ask questions like this as a way of feigning interest in the whole thing.

It seems like a normal question. It’s something I have and would ask friends/my sisters etc - to see how it’s going/how bottle feeding is going if not, because it also impacts what they can/can’t do (friends who stop breastfeeding find it easier to leave baby with someone else to go out - so relevant if making social plans).

I would guess though it’s maybe a touchy subject because the people that are asking have previously expressed an opinion on it and it’s a loaded question?

How is breastfeeding remotely comparable to sex?

I've asked this question before, but never meant in a judgemental way. It's more just a standard talk about the mundane weather/sleeping/weaning/crawling/walking stuff. I'll stop asking that question!

My baby is 8 month. We went to mixed feeding at 7 months because I went back to work. She takes a bottle during weekdays and I bf early mornings, evenings and weekends.

Every time I’ve been asked if I’m still bf it has been followed up with admiration and support.

It’s impossible to know whether YABU without tone and context.

I really don’t understand how this is in any way to “old people having sex”. You’re feeding your baby.... bizarre.

How does breastfeeding equate to sex? When the breastfeeding question was first asked, l was puzzled. Now, l’m totally confused! 🤔

A friend of the family asks my mother if I am still BFing, every time they see each other. I am sure she is hoping that DM will say 'oh no she's stopped' so that she can brag that her DIL is still. I find it infuriating.

I would guess though it’s maybe a touchy subject because the people that are asking have previously expressed an opinion on it and it’s a loaded question?

I don’t think it is from what’s been said. OP sounds very prudish. I get the impression that for OP people asking about breastfeeding first and foremost equates asking about her body and breasts, not her child’s eating habits.

I've asked this question before, but never meant in a judgemental way. It's more just a standard talk about the mundane weather/sleeping/weaning/crawling/walking stuff. I'll stop asking that question!

I dont think theirs any need to stop asking the question. It's just social chit chat about babies and I've yet to meet someone who hasn't given a fully comprehensive answer as people usually love talking about their babies and everything about them. Anyway most people dont really care if you are or not, it's just small talk.
The OP seems super sensitive and strange about it especially as it was her mum asking.

Her reaction to her mum,s question was well over the top.
Whether you breast feed or not is hardly classified information by anyone's
standard. ( with the exception of the op)

What difference does it make?

Sorry there is a quote fail here - was trying to ask the pp what difference it meant whether baby was 6m or 3yrs.

I'm not sure how it's offensive but having said that you can absolutely refuse to answer.

You clearly find it a very offensive question, but in and of itself, it’s not an offensive question.

It’s not offensive in and of itself, it’s just that it’s so rarely a neutral question.

I’ve had it from people implying that I should have stopped by now because it’s unnecessary. I’ve had it from Uber competitive mothers who are only asking so they can compare it to themselves. I’ve had it from people who want to use it to launch into an explanation of why they couldn’t breastfeed.

If you genuinely care how someone is feeding their baby (or are feigning interest…) just say ‘how is the feeding going?’. That’s a neutral, unloaded question which doesn’t have any awkward implications.

It would be weird from a stranger. From your mother and MIL I don't see the problem?