I left an note…

[Whiskytangofoxtrot12345]

Basically, I feel like a petty “Karen”.

Our local supermarket has a limited amount of toddler parking. They are always full, normally parked in with people that don’t have kids, have teenagers with them, etc.

I have 2 children under 2. I really struggle if I can’t get parked in those spaces (have to leave trolley behind car with child in while I get the other one out and it’s a busy car park, i leave and go back later).

Went today and there was one space left. Saw numerous people coming and going, childless. So I left a note on one of the cars explaining why these spaces are important to me and if they could please respect that.

You’re supposed to be fined for parking in them unwarranted but it’s not policed.

AIBU…I feel awful now and regret doing it.

I just don’t see why I should struggle because people are lazy and want to park as closely as possible to the entrance.

It is frustrating. You left a note, hopefully the person will be more considerate next time. Worse case they ignore it. Don't feel awful about it.

YABU for using the shitty sexist term 'Karen'.

And also YABU to think the driver will give a shit that you can't park without using a P&C space.

Don’t feel bad about it.

Boils my blood people using these spaces that don’t have kids. I have said on numerous occasions to people in a very worried tone….’excuse me..you seem to have left your child in the supermarket’. Then they look confused. Or dutifully embarrassed. If confused I go on to point out that perhaps they weren’t aware they were parked in a child and parent parking or did they knowingly deprive an actual parent with a child of the space?

But then. I’m an arsehole

YANBU. I have 2 toddlers too, one autistic who loves to bolt. I actually had an argument with a lady recently about this. Went to pull into a parent&child park with my 2 toddlers in the car, she cut in front of me. I waited, rolled down window and asked politely did she realise it was for parents&children, she told me to fuck off that she had a sore leg. So I said unless she birthed that sore leg from her vagina it was irrelevant. Not my finest moment but she really annoyed me and I had to wait another 15 mins or so before another suitable space came up.
So, don't worry about leaving a note. You were much more polite than I was.

@WorraLiberty

YABU for using the shitty sexist term 'Karen'.

And also YABU to think the driver will give a shit that you can't park without using a P&C space.

Agree on both counts. 'Karen' is dreadful expression.

@WorraLiberty
Sorry, I did realise that as I posted it. It isn’t a nice term to use.

I’m not expecting people to care about parking but to be more considerate.

@Whatelsecouldibecalled
I did politely say something to someone last week and he just blew up at me so I’ve resorted to passive aggressive notes (it wasn’t actually aggressive but just pointing out the facts).

Not sure how to edit to erase the Karen terminology, sorry.

I’ll try to be considerate of others in future

Is it one of the big brand supermarkets? This happened to me at our local Tesco. I waited patiently for a p&c space and just as one came free a cf woman in a huge 4x4 shot into it and marched into the store smirking at me. At the time I had a 4yr old with Learning difficulties and no impulse control and a 3 yr old. After I had managed to park and wrangle them into the trolley and reported the driver to the cctv/security man who said he couldn't enforce it but then put her reg out on the tannoy and asked her to move her car meanwhile I was hiding in the wine aisle!

They are not legally enforced and I don't think you can be fined.
Surely if you have to park further away you leave babies in car strapped in while you get the trolley, put all in trolley walk across car park.
It's a minor inconvenience and wouldn't stop me shopping.
I would get a lot more worked up about people parking in essential disabled spaces.

The kind of person who parks in the space won’t give a shit about it. There’s no point in feeling bad now - they’ll forget it sooner than you will 🤷🏻‍♀️

I don’t see P&C spaces as an entitlement, just nice to have. I’d just park further away, the issue is getting them in and out of the car safely, and you can do that further from the door.

I agree with you op. It's hard when you've got the little ones to think of but there will always be inconsiderate people. Don't feel awful about leaving the note. You've done it now and I really don't think it was the end of the world. There are plenty of worse ways to handle it.

Could the people parking in these spaces be disabled (incl invisible disabilities) or have blue badges?

They are not legally enforced and I don't think you can be fined.

You can be fined by the supermarket's private parking firm but legally you don't have to pay it.

I'm pretty sure they wouldn't give a shit about your little note 🤣

I really really really don't get why people would park there when they don't have kids in pushchairs. The only group that can be forgiven are the disabled where there are no disabled space.

I see people with kids over 8 park there. Why? Are they really so lazy that it is worth it to avoid walking a few extra yards?

Karen is a fucking awful term, please don’t use it.

I have said on numerous occasions to people in a very worried tone….’excuse me..you seem to have left your child in the supermarket’.

I do this too. On one occasion when I wasn’t in a hurry ans it was the second time I’d seen the same (distinctive) childless car park in one, with every indication that they were an asshole rather than disabled/pregnant/confused/whatever other possibility might exist to excuse it, I parked across the back of their car and went into the shop cafe for a coffee and a good view out the window.

@WorraLiberty

YABU for using the shitty sexist term 'Karen'.

And also YABU to think the driver will give a shit that you can't park without using a P&C space.

I agree with the Karen part but the rest of your message is unnecessarily mean, it's pretty difficult to get babies/toddlers out of cars in a normal space, it doesn't mean OP can't park

"Basically, I feel like a petty “Karen”."

Basically you lost me when you outed yourself as a misogynist.

@Jakadaal
Love it 😂 I know a lot of mums in the area have mentioned it to the supermarket but it’s not their car park. It’s meant to be managed by a firm but no one polices it. It’s a £100 fine.

@1starwars2
It’s more that I’d have to leave the trolley at the back of the car with cars going past while I squeeze the other one out to get in the trolley. It’s a tight and windy car park that it supposed to be one way but people ignore it. It’s that bit that I worry about.

@CuriousOrangee
I do have a look on my way past and they rarely have blue badges (and disabled spaces are often empty). I’d have no problem with someone with a disability using them as “overflow”.

@walkoflifewoohoo

"Basically, I feel like a petty “Karen”."

Basically you lost me when you outed yourself as a misogynist.

OP has apologised

Yeh agree with others up thread. YOu were inconvenienced and you left a note to express that. Nothing wrong with that.
I am afraid I also find the use of Karen as a misogynist label to silence women.

HEAVEN FORBID women every object to anything....................

Go ahead and complain if you have cause to and you want to. Men wouldn't hold back in the same circs.

If it was Sainsbury’s their rules are that you park with a child under 12 so the teenagers you saw may have with 11 year old sibling and been parked legitimately.

I am really sorry for the Karen comment.

I can’t edit the post to retract it but I will be a lot more mindful of my terminology in future.

Honestly just don't worry about it (apart from the Karen thing ). You did it, it's done, it'll never be traced back to you, someone might actually stop parking there. Don't waste any more time thinking about it.