How many women would choose the men’s facilities or the mixed facilities if there was a choice ?

[Thecatonthemat]

Given there seems to be some support for the notion that we can disregard safety issues , i would be interested to know how many of us would choose the option of men’s or mixed sex facilities if there are single sex available, and if so why?
YANBU = this is a really good idea,
YABU = I won’t support such a potentially dangerous idea

Prisons, where the people are locked in, should absolutely always be single sex.

@Watchingyou2sleezes

Mixed toilets- blokes kissing here there and everywhere...

No chance

It's the shit on the walls I'd object to TBH. Men's toilets are disgusting because the fairies who clean the toilet after themselves are not men.

@Backhills

I quite often nip in the gents when there's a long queue for the ladies. I am also aware that it's not OK if a man did the same in reverse.

Please explain?

I would imagine that some men might not like a woman in their spaces due to a) cultural/religious reasons, b) they may have individual/particular issues which mean they are uncomfortable around women, c) they may be concerned they could be accused of assault. But because it seems relatively unlikely that an average man would feel physically threatened by you, so you think it's ok to go in their facilities while reserving the right to be offended at men in the ladies'?

If the women's near me change to mixed sex by self ID then logically, the men's would be safer and quieter so I'd use them and loudly say why.

At work, the toilets nearest to my office are mixed. I have absolutely no problems with them (individual cubicles with their own sink) and choose to use these when on my period as much easier to rinse menstrual cup when there is a sink in the cubicle with you.

I would rather leave the building and find other facilities than use a mixed or male bathroom.
I feel very vulnerable, especially around the time of my period. I like the sisterhood of female bathrooms. Offering everything from tampons and compliments to even a quick smile. It can feel like a safe space away from the world.

It depends on layout. A nearby pool has a mixed area with individual cubicles and also an open men's changing and open women's changing roomie no cubicles in those areas. I think this is perfect for everyone but always use the mixed cubicles. I much prefer mixed cubicles to open single sex rooms.

I would never go in the men’s toilets unless I was about to shit myself.

Obviously not men’s toilets unless absolute no other option emergency. Mixed are fine if they are appropriately well managed and not in a socially or economically challenging locality where facilities may be criminally used for drugs and sexual activities (if according to crime statistics and occasional news coverage).

I quite often nip in the gents when there's a long queue for the ladies.

Same here when I have been about to wet myself. I’ve always asked if it was ok, and thanked them profusely. In and out of the stall in less than two minutes and at the sink washing my hands. I thank them again as I leave. I just want to get in, pee, and get out.

Absolutely Single sex every time. I would never choose mixed if I had a choice.

The women claiming they would happily use the mens's toilets are making me laugh as the smell alone would put them off! They're possibly the same people who tell other women they are disgusting for wearing the same bra twice.

It would be interesting to see if men would have the automatic judgement of feeling unsafe if women were using their facilities. Yes there’s potentially a risk of using mixed sex facilities but surely there’s also a risk of using single sex, for example using the women’s? What automatically makes the women’s safer?

I've had to use a "mixed" toilet recently when out with the family, it was horrendous. The mess, the stink, the urinals, guys coming into pee while I was stuck in the cubicle waiting to leave!

I did give feedback to the company who owned the toilets

I would and have gone to the men’s, I prefer mixed anyway because based on my experience the women’s bathroom usually tend to have the absolute worst waiting and my waiting time tends to be greatly reduced when using mixed or male facilities so I always go for what’s quicker if allowed.

I have never felt unsafe going to the men’s nor would I if they came to women’s. I have been to many kinky/fetish parties (one a few days ago actually) where you aren’t wearing much and I have NEVER been touched without my consent in those places either. Ever.

How many sexual assaults happen in public bathrooms when people can walk in at any time vs any other setting? What’s the data?

I have been assaulted in my life (not in a public restroom but in my own house by people I trusted) so while I am aware I could technically be raped in a public bathroom by a stranger, my extensive experience of using the men’s restroom and going to parties where they happen to be around and neither of us are wearing much, has shown me that men aren’t the issue. Rapists are. Men don’t make me feel unsafe, rapists do. And a rapist can be anyone from a woman, to your dad to our respective (and respected) GPs.

And I have personally found out that peeing next to men’s don’t actually and interestingly enough them into rapists and that if someone wanted to rape someone a separated bathroom wouldn’t be a protection to that. (Again how many women have been raped? And of that percentage how many were raped in public bathrooms?) you will find that a predatory rapist will rape you anywhere. He won’t need to enter the bathroom to get to you and a smart rapist probably wouldn’t do it in a spot where he can easily be spotted and interrupted.

It’s important to bring up safety issues and discuss them soundly but acting as if all men are out there to rape you and that you will absolutely be raped if you enter a men’s or mixed bathroom is not the best way to do that, especially if you haven’t been to a men’s bathroom yourself are just going off prejudices and your own biases.

Definitely wouldn't use mixed or mens if I had the choice.

As long as they’re kept clean I have no problems using men’s or mixed toilets. The queues for women’s toilets are ridiculous.

The women claiming they would happily use the mens's toilets are making me laugh as the smell alone would put them off! They're possibly the same people who tell other women they are disgusting for wearing the same bra twice.

Oh yes, because women’s toilets are always pristine and nice-smelling. 🙄

I am in the minority with my vote. I don't feel threatened or in danger in a male environment. The threat of danger can come in many forms, in many places and from many people, male or female.
I have worked in some male dominated areas for most of my working life so this has probably had a a positive effect on how I view some situations that are being described in this post. These environments have also left me vulnerable to danger from females, youths and adults in a variety of different situations showing that threats of danger can come in all forms, so this may explain why some like me might be in the minority.

As long as they’re kept clean I have no problems using men’s or mixed toilets. The queues for women’s toilets are ridiculous.

This! That’s my main issue with public loos. I have a map in my head of the usually clean public loos in my head if I ever need to go.

*Ugh.. was trying to press preview

@dworky

The women claiming they would happily use the mens's toilets are making me laugh as the smell alone would put them off! They're possibly the same people who tell other women they are disgusting for wearing the same bra twice.

You realize not all men’s bathroom are the same, right? I have been to men’s restrooms who were in a much better states than women’s by far!

So no, I am not picky when it comes to bathrooms and have never had an issue going to men’s/mixed ones. I also wouldn’t be judging a woman for how often she wears her bras (do people really have time to ponder and care about that?)

You are out there calling women who have no issues going to another bathroom’s funny and likely judgmental of other women and their hygiene (even though no comments have referenced women and their bras) clearly judging and making unfounded assumption about them/other women. Can’t you see the irony?

I have been flashed in a local park though, in the middle of the day. And on a uni campus, again, middle of the day.

Me too, I wonder what the OP suggests to stop that?

Unfortunately sex offenders will offend wherever they see fit. Allowing everyone to use the same toilet space (with separate cubicles) is not going to encourage or discourage them in any way.

I’ve always worked in places with mixed facilities. Has never been an issue. In my experience women are far more nasty and dangerous than men.

Just to add - mixed facilities included mixed changing rooms. Never been an issue. The only time i’ve ever been intimidated was in a women-only changing room in a gym… by a group of women.