Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to stop the online grocery orders and delivery?

146 replies

BouncyDaisy · 03/07/2021 17:58

I live at home with my mother. I have an account with one of the online groceries home delivery shops. Every week since last winter I was did online groceries for a home delivery.

We have a problem now at home. The yard is neglected and the grass is getting too long. This problem wasn't bad in the winter because the grass died from the cold over the winter. Back in April of this year I knew this was going to be an issue. I suggested to my mother that I could get a battery operated strimmer online because they are easier on the back and she dismissed the idea because I am female and she said not to be ridiculous because we already have a grass strimmer. It's a petrol one by the way. It was bought a few years ago where my brother used it to cut the grass. He still lives at home but he has some issues with drugs and he's a stoner. My mother had faith in him back in April/May of this year that he was going to cut the grass. He hasn't cut the grass and he won't do it either. My mother doesn't want to get a gardener to cut the grass or even some of the grass because I suppose she can't afford it because she's too busy allowing my brother to live free at home. She likes to pity him for being male and she subsides his share of all of the household bills. It's only recently I put in this boundary where all the bills are to go 3 ways and if she wants him to go free, she can pay for him. Before that the bills were 50/50 between me and her. My mother has narcissistic tendencies and I was paying up to maintain the peace.

The grass situation is getting ridiculous now. Its too long. I will put up a picture with a lot of the area cropped. This isn't even half of it. It's as high as the windows now. To get into the door, you need to climb through the grass where there is a small path. It's not too bad on a dry day. It's manageable but on a wet day, it's awful because the legs and shoes get wet. I'm experiencing problems now too with ticks. I went out to the bins the other evening and the next day I found a tick stuck to me. I suspect it was from climbing through the grass. I'm experiencing regular problems now with ticks. My brother is a drug addict and he spends a lot of time in his room and he doesn't have the problem of ticks because he's not battling through the grass.

I think the grass is so bad now. I don't think it's very fair for a delivery driver to battle through this grass to deliver groceries. There's also massive weeds within inches of the front door.

AIBU to stop the online grocery orders and delivery?
OP posts:
Grellbunt · 03/07/2021 19:25

Not much sympathy being shown for someone clearly struggling with a very difficult family here.

Thelnebriati · 03/07/2021 19:26

If you google, you'll probably be able to find the strimmer manual online. They're pretty easy to use.

I was a single parent and supplemented our food by keeping two allotments and growing food in the garden as well.

Moonwhite · 03/07/2021 19:34

I guess a battery strimmer, or a basic plug one and a long extension cable. They're very simple. The main thing is replacing the strimming "blade" when it's run out.

I'm sorry your family is so useless. Do what you can do to make life easier for yourself, and plan to leave when you can.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 03/07/2021 19:38

@Grellbunt

Not much sympathy being shown for someone clearly struggling with a very difficult family here.
I think that may be because if I am not mistaken this has been posted on for a long time. Unless that is a different OP with mother who didn't want son to pay rent etc.
HalzTangz · 03/07/2021 19:39

I have both a petrol and battery strimmer, both are the same to use (one isn't easier than the other)
Just get out and cut it done, or tell your lazy brother to do it

Whitchurch · 03/07/2021 19:40

You live there. Just do what you need to do. Either use the strimmer yourself (instructions will be on-line) or enquire locally to find a handy person who will come and do it for you.

Grellbunt · 03/07/2021 19:40

Ah right, didn't know that

Marmite27 · 03/07/2021 19:41

-Cancel the cheque?- Cut the grass? Confused

AlwaysLatte · 03/07/2021 19:42

Well done for getting your brother to pay his way at least. If you don't know how to use a petrol strimmer get your local lawnmower repair shop to service it and show you how to use it at the same time. Once your brother sees you going out and doing it he will probably start stepping up - sounds like a bit of a power thing, and weird. Do you still want to live with them? Not sure I would!

spotcheck · 03/07/2021 19:42

OP
you can do it.

The first rule of strumming is to wear long trousers, and closed shoes.
The cut grass will stain, so wear gardening shoes/ boots If you have them.

Ensure there is string/ twine poking out the bottom

Make sure the whippy end is no where near your feet/ legs/ hands.

Petrol strimmers are heavy, but I used one as a teenager and was fine. You'll be ok.

Just look at videos on YouTube, and then just have a go.
Like most things, it may take a few tries to get it right.

Good luck
🎉

PanamaPattie · 03/07/2021 19:43

Put up the fence!

spotcheck · 03/07/2021 19:43

*strimming

Strumming had wildly different rules, which involve putting your fingers on the strings.

saraclara · 03/07/2021 19:45

To be fair, a battery one is going to struggle against that sort of grass. And I bet you anything the pteron one won't start after being neglected for so long.

I'd move out, OP. This family set up sounds painful. Free yourself from it.

saraclara · 03/07/2021 19:45

pteron? Weird. petrol obv

HalzTangz · 03/07/2021 19:46

@Aposterhasnoname

You’ve still not explained why you can’t just buy the strimmer you want. You clearly have your own income so your mother “dismissing” you is irrelevant.
I think she eats it included in the bills so shes only paying a 3rd towards it
Doghead · 03/07/2021 19:46

Jeez. Just buy the bloody strimmer yourself and cut the grass.

DentonsFringeArnottsWaistcoat · 03/07/2021 19:46

They think you can’t use the strimmer because you’re female? (Though tbh you are proving them right atm, just google it ffs). Gawd knows what they’d think of me then - so far today I’ve used my very heavy petrol Stihl strimmer, my petrol lawnmower, my petrol hedge trimmer and various other manual gardening tools.

gurglebelly · 03/07/2021 19:50

@BouncyDaisy

Nobody showed me how to use the strimmer before. I don't know how to operate the strimmer. I know there is a fuel tank to the back of the strimmer and a line feed to the front of the strimmer but I don't know how to operate it. I asked to be showed so many times but he won't show me.

I wanted to buy my own strimmer but a battery operated one so that I can learn from the instructions and also it would be lighter on the back. My mother dismissed that idea and placed faith that my brother will cut the grass.

Just ignore your mother
Biblionerd · 03/07/2021 19:51

There are so many options for you here.

Get on Google and watch a you tube on how to use the strimmer, then cut the grass yourself.

Decide you're a grown up and treat yourself to a strimmer.

Employ a gardener who can cut it back for you.

Continue moaning on MN whilst watching the grass getting longer and decide there is a correlation between grass and groceries.

IncyWincy21 · 03/07/2021 19:51

Just cut the grass.

boireannach · 03/07/2021 19:52

Baggie up the grass let the stoner smoke it 🤤

grapewine · 03/07/2021 19:54

Unless that is a different OP with mother who didn't want son to pay rent etc.

I know it sounded familiar. OP, you'll be so much happier away from there (and them). Really, you will.

Fitforforty · 03/07/2021 20:00

OP you’ve posted about the same issue before. I believe people told you to read the instructions, look on YouTube or pay someone to sort it out. I’m not sure why you are posting about it again.

Tumbleweed101 · 03/07/2021 20:06

Consider getting a little rotary lawnmower. I wasn't very good at getting petrol lawnmowers or strimmers started but my little electric rotary mower is amazing and fights through long grass, nettles and brambles. Even if you only do the path edges it will allow easier access to the house.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 03/07/2021 20:08

@BouncyDaisy - if you don’t want to rile your mum by buying a battery strimmer, why not hire a gardener for an hour and get him to teach you how to use the petrol strimmer?