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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to stop the online grocery orders and delivery?

146 replies

BouncyDaisy · 03/07/2021 17:58

I live at home with my mother. I have an account with one of the online groceries home delivery shops. Every week since last winter I was did online groceries for a home delivery.

We have a problem now at home. The yard is neglected and the grass is getting too long. This problem wasn't bad in the winter because the grass died from the cold over the winter. Back in April of this year I knew this was going to be an issue. I suggested to my mother that I could get a battery operated strimmer online because they are easier on the back and she dismissed the idea because I am female and she said not to be ridiculous because we already have a grass strimmer. It's a petrol one by the way. It was bought a few years ago where my brother used it to cut the grass. He still lives at home but he has some issues with drugs and he's a stoner. My mother had faith in him back in April/May of this year that he was going to cut the grass. He hasn't cut the grass and he won't do it either. My mother doesn't want to get a gardener to cut the grass or even some of the grass because I suppose she can't afford it because she's too busy allowing my brother to live free at home. She likes to pity him for being male and she subsides his share of all of the household bills. It's only recently I put in this boundary where all the bills are to go 3 ways and if she wants him to go free, she can pay for him. Before that the bills were 50/50 between me and her. My mother has narcissistic tendencies and I was paying up to maintain the peace.

The grass situation is getting ridiculous now. Its too long. I will put up a picture with a lot of the area cropped. This isn't even half of it. It's as high as the windows now. To get into the door, you need to climb through the grass where there is a small path. It's not too bad on a dry day. It's manageable but on a wet day, it's awful because the legs and shoes get wet. I'm experiencing problems now too with ticks. I went out to the bins the other evening and the next day I found a tick stuck to me. I suspect it was from climbing through the grass. I'm experiencing regular problems now with ticks. My brother is a drug addict and he spends a lot of time in his room and he doesn't have the problem of ticks because he's not battling through the grass.

I think the grass is so bad now. I don't think it's very fair for a delivery driver to battle through this grass to deliver groceries. There's also massive weeds within inches of the front door.

AIBU to stop the online grocery orders and delivery?
OP posts:
BouncyDaisy · 03/07/2021 18:15

Nobody showed me how to use the strimmer before. I don't know how to operate the strimmer. I know there is a fuel tank to the back of the strimmer and a line feed to the front of the strimmer but I don't know how to operate it. I asked to be showed so many times but he won't show me.

I wanted to buy my own strimmer but a battery operated one so that I can learn from the instructions and also it would be lighter on the back. My mother dismissed that idea and placed faith that my brother will cut the grass.

OP posts:
Groundtoahalt · 03/07/2021 18:15

Look on YouTube, there will be a video showing you how to do it.

Better yet, move out.

Longestfewdaysupcoming · 03/07/2021 18:15

Google how to use the strummer and just go and cut the grass?

Howshouldibehave · 03/07/2021 18:15

@Cattitudes

Cancelling the online shopping would definitely be the most logical solution here Hmm
Grin.

Just cut the bloody grass, @BouncyDaisy!!

LordEmsworth · 03/07/2021 18:16

Use the strimmer yourself - YouTube will have any number of "how-to" videos.

Or pay a gardener yourself.

Or buy the battery one.

Or move out and leave them to it.

Cancel the deliveries and go to Aldi regardless.

If you want to complain about your family relationships that's fine, but you don't need to worry about the delivery driver's feelings... you're allowed to just moan on your own behalf!

DonLewis · 03/07/2021 18:16

This isn't about the grass, not really, is it?

How come you're living at home with your mum and brother?

tonyunclejohnny · 03/07/2021 18:17

@BouncyDaisy

Nobody showed me how to use the strimmer before. I don't know how to operate the strimmer. I know there is a fuel tank to the back of the strimmer and a line feed to the front of the strimmer but I don't know how to operate it. I asked to be showed so many times but he won't show me.

I wanted to buy my own strimmer but a battery operated one so that I can learn from the instructions and also it would be lighter on the back. My mother dismissed that idea and placed faith that my brother will cut the grass.

So go buy one and do it yourself or move out! Why are you dismissing what has been suggested several times. Unless you under 16 why are you doing what your mummy tells you to. Grow a back bone and take control of the situation one way or another.

Ffs

mrsm43s · 03/07/2021 18:17

@BouncyDaisy

Nobody showed me how to use the strimmer before. I don't know how to operate the strimmer. I know there is a fuel tank to the back of the strimmer and a line feed to the front of the strimmer but I don't know how to operate it. I asked to be showed so many times but he won't show me.

I wanted to buy my own strimmer but a battery operated one so that I can learn from the instructions and also it would be lighter on the back. My mother dismissed that idea and placed faith that my brother will cut the grass.

Oh come on, don't be ridiculous, you're an adult.

You don't need to be shown how to use a strimmer, and you don't need your mum's permission to spend your own money.

Vanishun · 03/07/2021 18:18

What exactly do you want from Mumsnet? Permission to cancel a delivery?

tommmanndjjerrry · 03/07/2021 18:18

This is actually insane.

Cut the bloody grass yourself either with the petrol one or buy the one you want.

Why would you need to cancel grocery deliveries?! Just cut the grass?!

Or move out. 4927383830000 miles away.

MattHancocksSexTape · 03/07/2021 18:18

So what was the reaction to your mother misplacing her faith in your brother?

spaceghett0 · 03/07/2021 18:19

That's a lot of drama over some grass that needs cutting! Can't you just cut it? It's not difficult

polkadotpjs · 03/07/2021 18:20

Can you move out?

tommmanndjjerrry · 03/07/2021 18:20

And although it's messy and ugly. It's not exactly a forest of nettles and hogweed.

Polly99 · 03/07/2021 18:21

Op, are you an adult with your own money? If so, and if you want the grass cut, why on earth are you letting your mother dictate whether you can buy the equipment you need to do it? This is a very strange dynamic. Buy the strimmer if you want to. This shouldn't be a big deal.

Aposterhasnoname · 03/07/2021 18:21

You’ve still not explained why you can’t just buy the strimmer you want. You clearly have your own income so your mother “dismissing” you is irrelevant.

Funnylittlefloozie · 03/07/2021 18:22

Using a petrol strimmer is not rocket science. Go on YouTube and find a video of someone using a strimmer that looks like yours, and follow their instructions. Or, take yourself to town and buy an electric one.

This is your home too, and you don't have to be pushed about by your mother and brother. If you want to have short grass, go and cut it.

Alternista · 03/07/2021 18:23

You need to leave home.

pissface · 03/07/2021 18:25

I've never been shown how to operate a strimmer. It's a strimmer. Not a plane.

girlmom21 · 03/07/2021 18:25

You don't need permission to buy a strimmer. You don't need permission to cut the grass. You don't need permission to move out.

MattHancocksSexTape · 03/07/2021 18:25

I’ve found that if you put a sausage or small carrot in your front jeans pocket, it fools the machinery into thinking you have a penis and alas you can use it as if you were a man. Hope that helps.

Midnightballerina · 03/07/2021 18:27

Are you on any local faceache sites?. Put up a post asking If any teens want to earn a few quid cutting the grass. Or just go & get a mower. You've been given lots of good ideas here.

Gazelda · 03/07/2021 18:29

Why not grab this opportunity to demonstrate to them both that you are a capable woman who is proactive about solving a problem?

But honestly, I'd save any money you were planning to spend on a battery strimmer into your 'moving out' fund. I presume you are saving to move out, aren't you?

jonny9487 · 03/07/2021 18:29

Put up a post asking If any teens want to earn a few quid cutting the grass.

Or you could ask some of your friends at school to help.

BrutusMcDogface · 03/07/2021 18:30

@MattHancocksSexTape

I’ve found that if you put a sausage or small carrot in your front jeans pocket, it fools the machinery into thinking you have a penis and alas you can use it as if you were a man. Hope that helps.
🤣🤣🤣

Op. How old are you? If you’re an adult, buy a strimmer but first of all, MOVE OUT.

If you’re a kid, commiserations and start saving to move out now.

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