THE singular most embarrassing moment of your life?

[OlympicProcrastinator]

You know, the one that pops in to your head at 3am 15 years later and you can still feel the burning shame?

I’ll start. Met a client at work and introduced myself, asked their name. It was a fairly unusual name so began making small talk about it / origins, someone I used to know with same name etc etc. Then….for some reason I just completely forgot what we were talking about and followed it up with, “So anyway, you haven’t told me your name”. Que a look of bemusement then disdain from him as he shook his head and said, “I think you’d better go away now”. It was just so awful. I shuffled off.
I saw him a few weeks later with a friend and he was pointing and laughing at me. That was 20 years ago. I Still cringe.

There was a cracking one on here a few years ago where a woman had gone to a wedding she didn’t like and was slagging it off by text to her husband. Except it wasn’t her husband. She’d accidentally text the bride!! Who promptly told her she was blocked forever.

Anyone care to share theirs?

@Whyemseeaye

When the lovely lady who sat opposite me in work announced she was having a birthday party that weekend, as it was a special one…

And I said oh lovely, yes 60 is a big one! That will be nice blah blah blah.

I then realised I was surrounded by stunned silence.

With a steely gaze she informed me that she was turning 40.

There was no way back for me other than to smile and nod…and die inside

Why would you take a potshot at her age when you clearly hadn't a clue?

@GreyhoundG1rl she definitely looked older than 40, but nowhere near 60

I don’t actually know what happened. It was like my brain completely disengaged and these words just popped out.

I’m nearly 40 now…so am waiting for the day someone makes the same mistake with me. Karma!!

OH, there are three, actually, and given my ages at the various incidents, they are equally embarassing.

When I was 15 years old, we lived in a beach tourist town. I routinely wore shorts and a halter top daily during the summer. I was in a crowded store when my halter's strap broke, and my top fell to my waist. I was mortified.

When I was about 17, I was at an outdoor concert. Someone flipped a cigarette butt (not sure what you guys call that), and it went down the front of my jeans. I shimmied out of my clothes in a crowd of about 2000.

When I was 21, I went to a massive party at my Uni. Realize that this was in 1971, still the tail-end of the 60's, and the party involved precisely what you think it would for that era. I woke up around 5:30 AM, on my dormatory roof, stark naked and covered in purple body paint. That was FIFTY YEARS AGO, and the friends I went to Uni with STILL WILL NOT TELL ME WHAT I DID! About forty years in, I decided that I really do not want to know.

Actually a week ago when the nurse asked how long have you waited for your op and I said since 7-30 this morning. What she meant was how long since diagnosis. Oops 😬

A relative of mine had a similar issue but back to front. A colleague asked if she was excited to turn 21. She was turning 40.

@Mamanyt I want to be friends with you

@NatSab

Ok so mine isn't actually funny... but very embarrassing and a lesson to us all! A few years ago I commented on a celebrity's instagram... The singer who sings the songs 'Smile' and 'The Fear'... Ok it's L*y Aen... I am scared to actually write her name out of fear she will see this lol!!! ( I know.. highly unlikely!!!)

She had put a post about something I thought was trivial and attention seeking and so I wrote something like 'Get over yourself'. I forgot i'd even done it and then was getting 1,000's and I mean 1,000's of friends requests because she had found a pic of mine on instagram, edited it so I looked less attractive and told the world I was a troll in an instagram post to her millions of followers! I couldn't quite believe what I was seeing and I was worried my face would be all over the papers for being a horrible person! I nearly had a heart attack and after hours of reporting it to instagram and freaking out.. the post eventually disappeared the next day.

Note to us all.... BE KIND! Although to be fair, her reaction was equally as mean as she knew I was going to get trolled in return! Needless to say.. i've never said anything remotely negative to anyone ever again!!!

Lol I had JUST read this when I got a facebook notification saying I had a memory for this day.

Apparently 6 years ago I called Lily Allen a dick for something attention seeking she had just done (I dont even like of follow her so it must have been something trending in the news, My comment said something about vandalism and free speech)... wonder if we where commenting on the same thing.

[quote SmellThat]@Mamanyt I want to be friends with you [/quote]
LOL, why THANK YOU! I'm honored. And mostly stay covered these days!

My husbands cousin went to a funeral in the wrong crematorium and was texting other family to find out where they were 😂😂😂 she told us the story at the start of another funeral and I found myself trying to stifle n giggles all the way through it (I laugh when I'm under pressure ) it was not good 🙈🙈

@shortpeopleproblems

Not mine, but one from a previous thread that makes me cackle without fail is the poster who somehow sucked her dentist's finger 🤣🤣

My worst cringe moment was as a teenager when I phoned my friend at home. Her sister answered and said she wasn't in, only, she sounded EXACTLY like my friend on the phone. I was like "riiiiiight, ok, she's 'not in', are you suuuure?" thinking it was my friend joking around, proceeded to chat random crap about school for a good 5 minutes before realising that of course it wasn't my friend because who would do that?!

I was mortified and now in my 30s still get cold sweats at the prospect of making phone calls.

😆 I also hate making phone calls. Your story reminds me of when I’d just graduated (in mid90s), I’d written to various companies that I was interested in gaining work experience in/working for. I thought I prob wouldn’t get any leads but one day the phone rang, my mum answered and said it’s X company for you. I must’ve told some friends at the time what I was doing and when I answered the phone, the guy sounded exactly like a good male friend of mine - I said ‘Oh, very funny B!’, but it wasn’t B, it actually was the bloke from the company 😂 think I managed to fudge it enough as I got the gig and gained some good experience. The guy still sounded like my friend tho (very softly spoken - quite unusual for a bloke).

My ex-friend persuaded me to take part in a flash mob where people would suddenly start running around a shopping mall pretending to shoot each other. I had my 5 year old with me FFS! I told her I didn’t want to do it but she wouldn’t stop banging on about it

Also when I was working with a woman who had recently been very badly injured and was now completely blind in both eyes. She’d changed from an Android to an iPhone and I uttered the immortal words ‘I see you’ve gone over to the dark side’ I literally wanted to die and apologised about 10 times.

Name changed for this as I did tell a few people!
Arrived on holiday at a kid friendly all inclusive hotel. Needed to get up early to get sunbeds and for whatever reason dh and I had had words. Probably just tired and grumpy. Anyway I marched round to the splash park area which was pretty quiet except for a bloke laid on his stomach on a sun bed facing the wrong way round. He was looking out towards the path I was walking on. I had just passed him when I realised I'd left my phone back at the room. I turned on my heel, adjusted the stack of towels under my arm and my bright pink vibrator fell out and landed directly in the mans eyeline. I scooped it up, said 'well that's just fucking perfect' and stormed back to the room where my husband laughed so hard he had to sit down for a minute. Not my finest hour. I now check all towels before setting off

My husband passed the phone to me and said "It's Dan." I took it from him and screeched "Thank fuck it's you, I thought it was my fucking dad being a pain in the arse again!"

Yep, I misheard DH saying 'yer dad'.

On a video call with my female manager and i went to say "we can touch base with each other" and what came out of my mouth was "we can touch each other". Anything for a bonus eh 😀

@ShrikeAttack your story about the straw had me howling. I like your honesty in resisting embarrassment and it's evil cousin, shame.

@MyFartWillGoOn
I'm crying. My DD is crying. My DP is crying.

Around the age of 18 after a night on the town. Always used the same taxi. Sat in the back wearing my coat and a halter neck Miss Selfridge dress, bra less. Sat talking to the driver all the way home.

Got in the house, took coat off and realised dress had completely fallen down and boobs were on show.

Mortified.

@blissfulllife

One memory that doesn't just embarrass me but also make me angry is the time we were at in-laws. All dh siblings there too for a meal. It was our child birthday that day. Mil birthday the week before. No one acknowledged our child's birthday (they had sent gifts beforehand). Then after dinner sil leaves the room and comes back with a birthday cake lit up with candles. Our child's face lights up and I think oh how lovely!!!. We all sing happy birthday except at the end everyone went "happy birthday toooo mom, happy birthday to youuuuu". Birthday cake was actually for mil not child who's birthday it was. Child looked so upset, I was mortified as id sang our child's name instead of mil, and dh just tried to act like nothing happened.

Oh your poor dc

I'm glad you sang your child's name. Maybe it'll have been a bit of a wake up call that they were being bloody ridiculous, insensitive, thoughtless idiots.

@Kindleandacuppa

I once had a blocked ear following a heavy cold and my boyfriends mum advised me at a family dinner (including sisters in law/brother in laws/nieces etc) to hold my nose and blow to unblock it, so I held my nose & blew and in the process let out the loudest fart I've possibly ever done with everyone watching, the whole table gave me a round of applause - I'm going bright red even thinking about it

OMG this has killed me

Geography exam at school. I was about 15 years old. Dead silence, heads down, intense concentration. I needed a another sheet of paper so tried to catch the teacher's eye, but he was buried in his papers. Put my hand up, waved it about, coughed a couple of times - all to no avail.

Finally, I called out: "Daddy".

Many moons ago I had the landlord from hell
He refused to do anything to the property and it was in a bad state of repair-very happy to take £1,000 a month in rent tho
Anyway one Sunday he dropped down dead of a heart attack
His son messaged to tell me that the funeral would be on x day and x time
I figured I’d go to show my respects to the family (and to make sure he’d actually died-knowing my luck he’d just been playing some shitty joke on me)
With my dads sage words of wisdom ringing in my ears (‘when the music starts at the end,do NOT stand up and start a round of applause’) I was a bit distracted and worried about getting back in time to pick the kids up from school,I joined everyone in the waiting room
All of a sudden,a door opens and I follow everyone in
10 minutes later the penny drops-I’d gone into the wrong funeral!
I had no choice but to style it out,sing along to this poor ladies chosen tunes and pray when asked to etc all the while trying to become invisible

I thought I’d got away with it until his son messaged to ask why I’d shown up at the crematorium but not joined the service

I just hope and pray that none of the family of the ladies funeral I did attend noticed me-I still turn myself inside out with embarrassment thinking about it

I thought I’d got away with it until his son messaged to ask why I’d shown up at the crematorium but not joined the service
Your landord?

At a group get together with lovely neighbours (who we did know) and their friends from church (who we didn’t), about 30 of us in all. Someone suggested the “if you had £10k to spend just on yourself what would you spend it on” sharing game. After various holidays and diamonds had been mooted, one lady said she’d like to get a tummy tuck but go abroad for it. Someone then said ok so what about £20k and tummy tuck lady said “ooh that would be lovely because then my husband could come with me” and before I could stop myself I loudly said “Then you could both get one!”
Prayed for ground to open up and swallow me.

@Mamanyt

OH, there are three, actually, and given my ages at the various incidents, they are equally embarassing.

When I was 15 years old, we lived in a beach tourist town. I routinely wore shorts and a halter top daily during the summer. I was in a crowded store when my halter's strap broke, and my top fell to my waist. I was mortified.

When I was about 17, I was at an outdoor concert. Someone flipped a cigarette butt (not sure what you guys call that), and it went down the front of my jeans. I shimmied out of my clothes in a crowd of about 2000.

When I was 21, I went to a massive party at my Uni. Realize that this was in 1971, still the tail-end of the 60's, and the party involved precisely what you think it would for that era. I woke up around 5:30 AM, on my dormatory roof, stark naked and covered in purple body paint. That was FIFTY YEARS AGO, and the friends I went to Uni with STILL WILL NOT TELL ME WHAT I DID! About forty years in, I decided that I really do not want to know.

@Mamanyt you sound like an absolute legend!

Just love these! Too embarrassed to share mine😀