To think people go way OTT with buying newborns presents?

[Peaplant20]

I’m pretty sure I’m going to be in the minority here but wondered if I’m not totally alone in this opinion? Had a beautiful newborn baby this year and have been completely overwhelmed with presents, many of which have been sent from people we barely know (friends of parents and grandparents). The thought is absolutely lovely and so sweet, but I find it totally overwhelming. However I feel like I’m so ungrateful! I really would rather people saved their money and just sent a card if we don’t know them, rather than ending up with a wardrobe fit to burst and each outfit is going to be barely worn it feels so wasteful and I really really hate waste. Two things have made it feel more overwhelming to me - 1. Baby came very early so we weren’t prepared ourselves and so when we got home I ended up spending literally 2 weeks sorting presents and washing clothes (and I’d already bought enough basic clothes so we probably didn’t need any at all), 2. I never had a baby shower because of COVID. I know baby showers are controversial on here but now knowing what I would do I would 100% have a baby shower in future because having not had one we have still received the same amount of gifts, but if I’d had a baby shower I’d have been able to sort/wash/put away gifts well before baby arrived rather than trying to do it when settling in after baby was born and feeling totally overwhelmed by it. I know some people might say I could have waited a while to do that but honestly we received an unbelievable amount of stuff so it couldn’t have just sat in the nursery or something as we wouldn’t have been able to get in there! I sort of wish people would ask if there was anything we needed rather than just send gifts as like I said we have ended up with so much stuff it feels really wasteful (and bad for the environment) and I’d rather people didn’t spend their money when we have so much stuff already! Am I just a horrible ungrateful person? Finding it hard to appreciate each new gift now (they’re still coming one month on), when I’ve nowhere to put these things and I’ve never even heard of some of the people who’ve sent them let alone met them. Oh and also lots of friends who’d had babies recently sent us clothes etc so we really didn’t need anything new at all. Anything that’s come recently I’ve just put all in one big bag as I can’t face looking at any more gifts (I’m horrible aren’t I??). I’m tempted to return them and use the money to buy things suitable for when baby is a bit older or give them away to someone who really needs them. I’ll stop rambling now!

@RoseAddict that’s interesting! I often go on other posts and can’t believe what people write. I was on one earlier about someone who had been overwhelmed with second hand clothes for her baby and someone told her she was a b*tch and an ungrateful cow! I also used to go on the pregnancy board a lot and people would ask things like is this food safe to eat? And the number of people who’s say things like ‘are you serious?’ And ‘are you always this anxious if so go to the GP’ and ‘wow it’s going to be a long 9 months for you.’ Not sure if they’re always meant to come across so rude but IMO a simple ‘yes it’s safe to eat’ will suffice! Anyway that’s a whole other conversation. Thanks for your replies on this thread anyway.

I was shocked at the amount of gifts we got. We had bought 30 thank you cards as preparation... we got over 100 gifts! Including my mum and in laws spending thousands (baby’s pram, cot, bedroom furniture, and even a massive amount of gifts for me....). We were completely overwhelmed

Everyone just needs to try their best and trying not to buy as many plastic toys is one way to do it

Many parents start off with good intentions. Sites like Babipur offer a huge range of beautiful wooden toys, some of which resemble works of art. Much nicer in your lounge/nursery than a heap of plastic. And for some a status symbol as they’re so expensive.

Then your child starts going to toddler groups or nursery or parties and suddenly you realise they love plastic toys! That beautiful Grimms rainbow gets abandoned in favour of the plastic contents of a party bag. Wooden nins become ‘babyish’ and they want to play with the plastic figurines a friend gave them as a birthday gift.

Once they get to 2 or 3 you can’t really control presents, unless you snatch the plastic toys away as soon as they rip the paper off.