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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU - Saturday Night England Match??

463 replies

CityMumma78 · 30/06/2021 23:50

Hey everyone, please help me…
This Saturday we are due to go out with my parents to celebrate their special wedding anniversary. We are going out to a low key basic chain restaurant with our kids and my brother and his kids and we have two tables booked for 7pm. This arrangement has been in place for 1 week and we all live local so no special guests travelling from miles around to attend. Last week when we were arranging the evening we didn’t even consider the Euro fixtures but because England won last night and are playing on Saturday night we REALLY want to watch the game! I asked my parents if they could change the booking by half an hour which would allow us enough time for a leisurely dinner and taking into account the drive home this would enable us to watch the 2nd half. I have checked at the restaurant and there is plenty of availability to make a slightly earlier booking but when I spoke to my parents last night they have refused, point blank refused to change the booking by half an hour from 7pm to 6.30!! There is no reason other than they don’t want to. I haven’t asked them to rearrange the date I just want to bring it forward by 30 minutes but I have been made to feel guilty for even asking and I’m so angry they they can’t be more flexible to allow us to watch just part of the England game in the quarter finals. My husband doesn’t even want to go now.
Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
ElizabethTudor · 01/07/2021 16:12

Yeah - that doesn’t really wash tbh.
If your husband is a massive footy fan to the degree that he’s now refusing to go, he’d have known a week ago that the quarters were this Friday and Saturday, and that if England got through we’d be playing on one of those days, and you said the meal was only booked 1 week ago. So you could’ve suggested an alternative at that point, eg, Sunday lunch.
As I said, I’m a big footy fan, and I still think if you’ve agreed to go, you’ve agreed to go. So just deal with it. You’re defo not going to help the relationship situation by trying to get out of it now.

skybluee · 01/07/2021 16:17

I didn't watch it or even know it was on, but I realised what was happening and that England had won from hearing the noises from outside... so to all the people saying it's possible to avoid it, it isn't depending on where you live.

JustLyra · 01/07/2021 16:27

So you want your parents, your brother and his kids to change their plans to suit you?

That's really unreasonable and I'm football daft. Anyone who valued the football more than a special family occasion would have checked the fixtures before booking.

Just record the game and watch it as live when you get home.

SmallPrawnEnergy · 01/07/2021 17:59

The meal on Saturday is the first thing they have ever arranged. Without going into details it’s very much a one sided relationship!
So the one time they try to make an effort and arrange something you make it obvious that it’s an inconvenience because of a football match (you didn’t care enough about a week ago to remember).

My parents are quite self absorbed, stubborn and difficult
What’s the saying, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree?

Honestly I’d just stop posting because you’re making yourself look worse with each post.

Yaykyay · 01/07/2021 18:05

Yabu to be angry

It's just football ffs

musicalfrog · 01/07/2021 20:00

[quote CoffeeAndDryShampoo]@musicalfrog if its been shown on bbc1 then it'll be on i player. I checked because I wanted to watch England/Germany again![/quote]
Thank you @CoffeeAndDryShampoo just need to try and avoid accidentally hearing the result! 😅

FlaminEckVera · 01/07/2021 20:03
Biscuit
Mayaspecialist · 01/07/2021 20:20

I am quite shocked you are so angry about this.

You agreed to the to celebrate their anniversary, now you are mad that they won't change these plans because you want them to? And you want them to so you can see part of a football game?

Everyone knows, you will be clocks watching and people can't take their time and relax and chat. Because you want to be off.

Besides which by the time it gets to extra time, then penalties you will be home for us missing that penalty. So you won't miss anything Wink

Mayaspecialist · 01/07/2021 20:21

To be fair, your husband and yourself sound quite selfish and stubborn.

And yes, mn can be brutal. It's why the people here like it.

Rosebel · 01/07/2021 20:49

I'm not surprised your parents don't bother if when they try to arrange something you moan about it and try to change things.
I wouldn't bother either.

Nutrafin · 01/07/2021 21:04

Everyone knows, you will be clocks watching and people can't take their time and relax and chat. Because you want to be off.
But the table/booking has a time limit anyway, so it doesnt make much difference.

Nutrafin · 01/07/2021 21:07

Honestly I don't get the mentality of some. If a family member wanted to move a booking by 30 minutes I'd happily accommodate. I certainly wouldn't be affronted, or cutting them out of will or whatever other overreactions people are suggesting.

Mayaspecialist · 01/07/2021 21:14

@Nutrafin

Everyone knows, you will be clocks watching and people can't take their time and relax and chat. Because you want to be off. But the table/booking has a time limit anyway, so it doesnt make much difference.
I disagree. They say they want to catch the 2nd half. They will be trying edge out as quick as they can.

Its weird that op was happy to go out with her selfish & stubborn parents, until there was a football match on. The fact that the op is now trying to justify it by saying how awful they are suggests, she knows it's a bit shitty.

But each to their own. I would never ask someone to move a booking, that was for their celebration because I wanted to see something on TV. To me that's rude.

Obviously, some people would do it.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 01/07/2021 21:27

I really don’t believe that massive drip feed. Thanks

Quaggars · 01/07/2021 21:53

YABVU.
Yes, I get people who like football are sometimes fanatical about watching, blah, blah, but surely when you said "Aye, that's grand" last week and let them go ahead and book it you must have realised there'd be a chance England could be playing on that day?!
It seems like you'd be pissing them about and for that YABU.

Cowbells · 01/07/2021 22:34

@MachiaNelly

I'd be really pissed off if I'd arranged a special dinner, was looking forward to it, then be told the evening was going to be rushed through, under pressure, because of the bloody football. Record it.
I agree. It's just a game. Record it. Focus on your parents. Watch it later. DH does this all the time so he doesn't miss out on family life.
Userg1234 · 01/07/2021 22:40

Remember what Bill Shakley said...is football a matter of life and death...no it's more important than that.

Your parents are trying to be controlling....fuck them

altiara · 01/07/2021 23:22

@CityMumma78
You should’ve just gone with the kids need to eat early. See if your brother can suggest that 😂

FunTimes2020 · 01/07/2021 23:51

@mrsbeeton999

Just say you’ve had a track and trace notification so can’t go
From Royal Mail?.Wink
FaceyRomford · 01/07/2021 23:56

If my DC's asked I'd agree but that would be the last time they were ever invited anywhere by me. It's just the Euros FFS not the World Cup. YABU and a CF to boot.

SlipperyDippery · 02/07/2021 00:02

It's just the Euros FFS not the World Cup

“Just the Euros” LOL
Out of interest would it be ok with you if it were a World Cup quarter final then?

Quaggars · 02/07/2021 00:10

..is football a matter of life and death...no it's more important than that.

Your parents are trying to be controlling....fuck them

actual lol Grin

As if

Monsterjuice · 02/07/2021 02:19

"The meal on Saturday is the first thing they have ever arranged"

Possibly because they know you and have decided it's much easier to let you organise as you'll always change plans ?

Monsterjuice · 02/07/2021 02:24

@ChloeCrocodile

How sad that family relationships play second fiddle to a football game.

In my family we care enough about each other to be flexible and make minor changes to accommodate things which are important to others. A 30 minute change to a dinner reservation to allow your child to do something which makes them happy is an absolute no brainer for me.

As someone who's been a child I think I could stand delaying watching a football match by a hour or two to accommodate something which would make my parents happy.

I mean come on, they've put up with my shit for decades, I bet they missed more because of me as a child than I ever will because of them as adults

SillyLittleBiscuit · 02/07/2021 04:37

It’s literally moving the start time by 30 minutes. That’s it. I can’t imagine anyone I know being offended by that. Rigid much.