To feel like looking 'average' these days is bloody hard work?

[JustGiveMeGin]

Disclaimer: I had a similar thread in style and beauty when I wasn't feeling my best. I have definitely made peace with how I look and this is NOT a woe is me thread 🤣
To even look average I have to dye the greys out of my hair, have my eyelashes and eyebrows tinted (did I mention greys?) Remove hair from underarms, legs, bikini area. Spray tan couple of times a week, moisturise after every shower (daily). Wash, conditon and blow dry hair daily. Anti wrinkle face cream twice daily after cleansing. That's just the basics....I can and do go out without makeup bit I feel better with: cc cream, face powder, bronzer, blusher, eyebrow pencil, mascara and lipstick.
To me I feel like I should look like a fucking goddess after all that effort but sadly I still sit in the firmly average camp!
Does anyone get what I mean or have I finally gone off my rocker for good?

I put a bit of product in my hair after its washed and do some basic make up if I get time in the morning. It does make me feel better as I can see the difference when I look in a mirror later in the day as long as I don't rub my eyes and get the panda/mascara look

I shaved my armpits a few weeks ago so I could wear a sleeveless top. Sadly this has resulted in a few awful spots which I'm treating with savalon as they look infected and sore - so no sleeveless tops for me anyway! Will leave the fluff alone next time.

I also catch my reflection in shop windows and think...who? Oh hello it's me! I try to be friendly to my middle aged self, who is no longer the willowy young thing she once was.

If I am a goddess, I'm more Venus of Willendorf these days than Artemis.

I dye my hair and brows but that's it. I'm milk white but fine with that. I look like a boy without mascara which use to bother me but now I couldn't careless. I shave when I need to. I really would stress at having to do what you do!

It's as much work as you make it. I generally don't look at people in the playground (when I'm collecting DS) and think this one looks great, that one doesn't. We're all just getting by the best we can in life.

A genuine smile and friendly demeanor are more beautiful to me than all the lipsticks in the world.

Well this all took a turn! From me having no personality or no character, conforming to a patriarchal society, ignoring diversity issues......etc etc etc.
Bloody hell, it was meant to be lighthearted
Why shouldn't people discuss and challenge the idea that endless beauty regimes are considered essential to look average?
The idea that all of this is required to look passable in life (as opposed to something people do because they enjoy the creativity of beauty styles) has to have come from somewhere.

Personally, the more women challenge the idea that a whole load of treatments and makeup etc is required to look average (aka beauty stuff is required to meet some basic threshold of acceptable attractiveness as decided by the beauty industry), the better.

I used to fall out of bed gorgeous, not anymore. It takes hours to just not scare the children.

I totally understand OP. I have my nails done, eyebrow wax and eyelash extensions (without these I look like a blind mole rat) With all these I tend not to wear makeup unless going out. I shave my legs and armpits regularly. I mostly do this for me, but I’ll never be beautiful. Just about average.

Gosh by your standards OP I probably look a fright! I’m white as a sheet. Have a shower, wash, condition and blow dry my hair. Then cleanse and moisturize my face. Also will apply some make-up if I’m going out somewhere which is a 5-10 mins job, if I’m staying at home then no make-up or sudocrem face! . I’m almost 40 and I’ve probably let myself go somewhat but I’d say I was still average!

I'm 50
I've let my hair go grey and love it it's so easy and I get loads of compliments
I use a Tinted BB cream and a bit of mascara for the day and that's it
Don't put ok much pressure on yourself
I bet you look just fine

Has someone already come along to tell you low-carb/keto will solve all your problems?

@JustGiveMeGin

Well this all took a turn! From me having no personality or no character, conforming to a patriarchal society, ignoring diversity issues......etc etc etc. Bloody hell, it was meant to be lighthearted

But what's light hearted about having to spend money, use up your time and energy and cover your body in chemicals to "look average"? And of course you won't look average. You'll look made up!

Whilst working on your self esteem is good to a degree I like to look in the mirror and feel pleased with what I see. I have no interest in getting anyone’s attention anymore. Grey hair no makeup, hair arm puts and a my blond eyelashes look rubbish and most people would ask if I were ill if they saw me. So I totally agree, it’s a huge effort but one I’ll continue with whilst also having pretty good self esteem.

Wait 'till you're 70! It doesn't get any easier, but I do try.

@osbertthesyrianhamster no not yet....please feel free to be the first!

I think it’s really odd to do all that if you don’t enjoy it and really unusual to be so obsessed with how you and others look.

I never do any of that, no make up, dye my lashes though, no hairdresser (curly hair) much better now grey grown in, feels softer. I even go out swimming first thing without brushing my teeth, short walk to baths. Pre breakfast. I never do my nails. Can't be arsed with any of that. Did it in the 70s when young and had enough by mid 80s, think art college had a lot to do with it aswell, work with hands so always in a state.

Just for @osbertthesyrianhamster.....

Keto/Low Carb will solve ALL your problems!

Literally all off them. Even whose turn it is to put the bins out.

You will want to put them out as it will have turned you into a goddess of the highest order.

Well I agree, I'm watching that Love Island (Ep 2 on catchup right now) everyone is so beatiful - lads and women.... why don't they have more normal people on it.

Or make a similar show, with normal people on it (oh they did, it was Big Brother!)

I agree OP. I dye my grey roots every month, lots of moisturising, epilation etc. I don't need fake tan as I am mixed race and don't wear make up due to allergies, but I have strong features so I don't think I look too bad. My main bugbear is my figure - I diet, run and do various other exercise A LOT and think I should therefore look like Liz Hurley ( similar age). But guess what? yeah - I don't!

I’m not sure anyone on big brother was “normal”. Surely you’ve got to be a bit unusual to want to go on that type of show. Most quiz show contestants just look like typical members of the public though.

Blimey if that’s what you do to look average I must look like Waynetta Slob daily 😂, although I’ve just treated myself to SPMU eyebrows recently and now quite happily throw a bit of tinted moisturiser on and do the school runs where previously I was drawing on eyebrows so I suppose that’s helped, I’ve never once had a spray tan or fake lashes or even painted nails unless I’m going somewhere but feel perfectly fine with myself. Also I feel like when I do make an effort there’s a marked difference then, couldn’t do it every day

First, what in God's green earth is wrong with looking "average?" For heaven's sake, MOST women look average, that's why they call it average.

We have been sold a bill of goods by advertising. We have been led to think that all these products and procedures will make us look like those who model them. In fact, many of those woman look VERY average when you see them in person. What you see on TV is the result of professional makeup artists, lighting experts and very good camera men. What you see in magazines is that, PLUS hours of painstaking airbrushing of photos. THEY DO NOT LOOK LIKE THAT! I cannot get photos to post here, but Google "top models with and without makeup" and click images. Most of those women you would never even notice on the street.

I have never bothered to cover my gray. I consider each strand to be a merit badge of a youth well-mispent...with the exception of the 300-400 that have my DSs names engraved in gold down the length of them. God gave me remarkably white (and thin) skin. So be it. I choose colors that compliment that, and go with it. I might, if going somewhere special, do full makeup, including lashes and brows, but otherwise you see what nature gave me. It is a remarkably comforting way to live, not to try to meet someone else's standard. I am clean, neat, well-groomed, and the rest can go hang.

I would be happy to look average. I look like an old mess no matter what I do, so don’t do much.

@Yepyes

I don't do ANY of that shit and I feel fine about myself.

I'm nothing special but I don't think any of that stuff makes a person look younger. I look much better after growing out the grey because I don't have the very ageing stripe after two weeks.

You need to work on your self esteem not your beauty routine.

Yes. To all this. Stop buying into the 'industry' bullshit that is eroding your self esteem for their profit. None of that is necessary, and I can think of a thousand things I'd rather do with that time, effort & money.

@CheeseIsATypeOfMeat

Well I do none of those things. I shower and brush my teeth and I brush my hair. That's it. How fucking awful must I look?! I have a whole face covered in freckles so make up looks stupid on me. I used to wear mascara but I've given up on that now too. I dread to think what people must think of me!

Me too. Also cut my hair short first lockdown. So liberating.

Not really thought about it before, I do basically the same and yes you are right!!!!