To be scared of my neighbour? Weird noises at nights...

[Mikadua23]

So this is going to be very messy and long..
We moved here 2 years ago, we live in 2 semi detached house and our neighbour is on our right.

We live in cul de sac and the area is very quiet and peaceful.
I dont work right now due to taking care of our young child and being pregnant with our second so I am home all days.

My neighbour is a man in his ( I believe 50s)
He is very shy when you try to say hello but usually kind, we don't have problems and never had.
He lives alone and have no family or friends, nobody ever visited him for the last 2 years..
He was always alone on christmas, easter or other celebrations..
We would check on him through the covid situation when he would not leave his house for few days at all and we would do some food shopping for him, he was very happy with the help.
I would give him christmas cards but never had one back (not that I expected him to give one! I have purerly felt sorry for him)
I would also give him a portion of christmas dinner last year and he was very happy although never really came back with dishes , he just left them outside our door 2 weeks after..

Our landlord did say to us when we first moved here, that our neighbour is weird and nobody in the road likes him but I never asked questions.

I wouldn't care about the way He chose to live if not the fact that he works night shifts every other week and every time he leaves the house, you can hear noises from his house like someone is still inside which is odd because he does live on his own.
As I mentioned before...
He never even had a friend coming over...

We share walls and it usually takes about 5 mins after he leaves around midnight and then you can hear someone coming down the stairs inside his house .

I dont know why, I am scared of this man and always find him a bit weird, it shouldn't really be in my intesrest whats happening inside his house but the whole thing is just odd.

Despite all this..

He never goes anywhere except his job where he works 12 hours shifts around 4 times a week.

This is ridiculous. If there is someone there then they obviously want to be there and he knows they are there. OP has admitted during the day she has no idea if she can hear 1 or 2 people next door but of a night when he goes out she can hear someone. What is weird about that?

Whoever is there appears to have free run of the house (not locked in a room) so could easily get out when the other person is not home. Even if front and back door are locked they could smash a window, bang on walls etc. For whatever reason they seem happy not to do this from all the examples people have given where people are kept prisoner.

The OP is also assuming he lives alone when this may well not be the case but could be many reasons why the person just doesn’t go out. No idea how people think she could interrogate him about this, I’d give short shrift to anyone who was so intrusive with me if I was the guy in this situation.

My sister once complained to her landlord that the person in the room above was walking round during the night and the creaking floorboards were keeping her awake. Turned out there was no room above, it was empty attic space. Houses do make odd noises.

Maybe he won millions on the lottery but doesn't want anyone to know how rich he is so he keeps himself to himself and pretends to leave for shifts but sneaks back in through a side wibdow/back door and it's just him you can hear.

All these people trying to shame the OP for being curious and concerned, and telling her she's the weird one who should keep her sticky beak out, you are the reason why things like Victoria Climbie and Baby P and Joseph Fritzl happen. And the reason why vulnerable people are cuckooed by drug dealers or are found dead in their houses after laying there for a year. People either don't care or they are too frightened of being seen as interfering.

I have just watched waaay too many criminal documentaries and now tell myself that he probably is an abducter

I advise you to not watch the movie Disturbia @Mikadua23 its exactly this situation!!

You know far too much about this poor man. You know he has no friends/family, no visitors, works 12 hour night shifts every other week for 4 nights, that he sits n his house with the blinds down during the day [how do you now what he's doing] . You 've been getting him some shopping even though he has a car, a job and is only in his fifties.

He's a recluse , give him a break !

When you read stories of abductions where the person is kept prisoner for years I often wonder whether the neighbours would have noticed something . Now I know, they did but mumsnet were horrified how nosey they were so they didn't dare think about it.

I’m confused about why you haven’t asked him a straightforward question given you seem to have a good relationship (I have never, even with neighbours I like and get on with, cooked or shopped for them if they were of working age and well).

Next time he’s out and you hear someone moving around, why can’t you text him (you say you message him so must have a mobile number) and just say “Is there anyone staying with you, Jim? I can hear someone in your house and wondered if I needed to call the police!”.

When you got his shopping what sort of thing did he ask for/how much? How often did you get his shopping? Can't you tell a bit from that if you were shopping for one person or two?

@McdonaldsMilkshake

Maybe he won millions on the lottery but doesn't want anyone to know how rich he is so he keeps himself to himself and pretends to leave for shifts but sneaks back in through a side wibdow/back door and it's just him you can hear.

Thank goodness! An explanation that isn't an abduction.

Many people seem to be focussed on OP's interest in the neighbour but entirely ignoring the fact she doesn't want to be this interested but there are human activity noises in an empty house . Would those people really not prick up an ear at this if they lived there?

When we moved into our current house (2 years ago) we thought the quiet, shy man next door lived alone. It turns out his partner lives there too. She obviously has extreme agoraphobia and anxiety and, according to other neighbours, has not left the house in approximately 6 years. Lots of similarities with your situation, no visitors, blinds closed etc. As it turns out mine are nightmare neighbours, for numerous reasons I won't go into here. I have often wondered with though who is enabling who in this situation and whether an Adukt Mental Health team or other agency should be involved/alerted but people do have a right to privacy. Your situation may something similar. As, I think someone else suggested maybe speak to people who have lived there longer to see if they know anything - to put your mind at rest.

simples
tell him you heard noises last night when he was at work is everything OK & smile!!!
I wish people would talk to each other it would save so many problems
Has it occurred to anybody that he might pop back mid shift to get something to eat?

Very strange

@butterpuffed

You know far too much about this poor man. You know he has no friends/family, no visitors, works 12 hour night shifts every other week for 4 nights, that he sits n his house with the blinds down during the day [how do you now what he's doing] . You 've been getting him some shopping even though he has a car, a job and is only in his fifties.

He's a recluse , give him a break !

To be fair the OP only knows this because she lives right next door to him and can see this easily with no prying whatsoever. It would be very odd if she don't know these things. OP has been very nice to the man helping him out. I don't know what you mean by 'give him a break'. She hasn't confronted him or anything.

The noises do sound a bit weird and people have been known to keep people prisoner in their homes. I watch a lot of true crime! Or he may have someone who is a proper recluse or is very unwell staying with him. I don't think there is anything you can do about it though unless you believe there is someone coming to harm and this does not seem to be the case.

@mumwon

simples tell him you heard noises last night when he was at work is everything OK & smile!!! I wish people would talk to each other it would save so many problems Has it occurred to anybody that he might pop back mid shift to get something to eat?

But then if he is keeping someone prisoner he’ll then just lock them in the attic and tie them up.

Many people seem to be focussed on OP's interest in the neighbour but entirely ignoring the fact she doesn't want to be this interested but there are human activity noises in an empty house . Would those people really not prick up an ear at this if they lived there?

She doesn’t know it’s empty though. She thinks it is, based on her observations and assumptions, but the reality is she doesn’t know for certain.

If he were keeping someone prisoner then presumably he wouldn’t go out for 12 hours at a time leaving them with the run of the house.

I have a neighbour who it seems knows everything about everyone she has a CCTV on the front of her house and she seems to appear as people come out of their houses, too often for it to be a coincidence.

For the most part she appears to be a decent person, but her level of nosiness around other people’s lives is weird.

Now, I’m naturally a suspicious person anyway lol 😂 and I would definitely call the police after he’s gone and tell em exactly what you’ve just said in your post! you’ve seen him leave and that he lives alone/ never has visitors etc.. cos that definitely ain’t a cat coming downstairs 😂
I’d also mention what your landlord said when you moved in as well and it’s been playing on your mind because after all that’s a really odd thing to say and single him out in that way. Plus that would’ve personally set the cogs in my mind turning immediately 😂

If something doesn’t feel right to you hun then it’s probably not and you don’t want to risk raising your children next to a potential psychopath/kidnapper/pedo/weirdo 🧐

Unfortunately you never really know who your living next to these days.

Take care and maybe keep us upto date? x

You never know who your living next to these days and if you have a kid and are expecting another then I wouldn’t feel comfortable living next door.

I would knock on the wall when he is out and see if there is an answer. Or ask your dh to knock at the door and if anyone answers say you were worried there had been a break in.

My vote goes to an elderly parent. However I’d be inclined to call the non emergency police if you’re sure he’s not there and can hear movement. Could be absolutely nothing or could be some sort of people trafficking etc

I imagine he has someone there he is carer for?

He could care for an older relative (with dementia/agoraphobia?) who is in the house?

If you have his mobile number I would message him when you hear noises and just say' hey mr x, I'm sure I saw you leaving the house, but I can hear loud noises coming from your house and am worried in case you have an intruder. Would you like me to do anything?'. See what he says?

This sounds so so much like that Tom Hanks movie The 'Burbs. (Script below):

*Come on, let's face it.
These Klopeks are strange.
I've been watching that house
ever since they moved in.

No one goes in. No one comes out.

No visitors. No deliveries.
What do you think they're eatin', Ray?

Well, maybe these people Just
want to keep to themselves, Art.
Remember when the
Knapps lived next door?
How many conversations did you
have with the Knapps? I had two.

• Oh, come on.

• They didn't even say goodbye when they moved.

Oh, please. Don't even compare the two.
At least, if they
weren't conversational...
the Knapps were semi-normal.
They worked in their yard. They mowed
their lawn. They had a lawn to mow.
These Klopeks... We don't even
know how many of them there are.*

And he later has a nightmare that his neighbour put him on a barbeque, trying to stab him while saying "MIND YOUR OWN BUSINES!!"