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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be scared of my neighbour? Weird noises at nights...

320 replies

Mikadua23 · 24/06/2021 00:33

So this is going to be very messy and long..
We moved here 2 years ago, we live in 2 semi detached house and our neighbour is on our right.

We live in cul de sac and the area is very quiet and peaceful.
I dont work right now due to taking care of our young child and being pregnant with our second so I am home all days.

My neighbour is a man in his ( I believe 50s)
He is very shy when you try to say hello but usually kind, we don't have problems and never had.
He lives alone and have no family or friends, nobody ever visited him for the last 2 years..
He was always alone on christmas, easter or other celebrations..
We would check on him through the covid situation when he would not leave his house for few days at all and we would do some food shopping for him, he was very happy with the help.
I would give him christmas cards but never had one back (not that I expected him to give one! I have purerly felt sorry for him)
I would also give him a portion of christmas dinner last year and he was very happy although never really came back with dishes , he just left them outside our door 2 weeks after..

Our landlord did say to us when we first moved here, that our neighbour is weird and nobody in the road likes him but I never asked questions.

I wouldn't care about the way He chose to live if not the fact that he works night shifts every other week and every time he leaves the house, you can hear noises from his house like someone is still inside which is odd because he does live on his own.
As I mentioned before...
He never even had a friend coming over...

We share walls and it usually takes about 5 mins after he leaves around midnight and then you can hear someone coming down the stairs inside his house .

I dont know why, I am scared of this man and always find him a bit weird, it shouldn't really be in my intesrest whats happening inside his house but the whole thing is just odd.

Despite all this..

He never goes anywhere except his job where he works 12 hours shifts around 4 times a week.

OP posts:
PixieLaLa · 24/06/2021 07:45

Secret lodger? A ghost? A large cat that can turn the taps on?

4PawsGood · 24/06/2021 07:46

The blinds being shut would make me veer away from someone hiding. Might be o coincidence.

How busy are the police where you are? You could phone the non emergency line and just explain. Then it’s up to them to decide if it’s worrying or not.

ElderMillennial · 24/06/2021 07:50

Most of the things you have said are not very strange and some don't fully make sense eg you say he didn't return your dishes but he left them outside your door...

I am interested in what the noise could be but it s probably nothing!

AngelDelightUk · 24/06/2021 07:53

Could you not mention it to him out of concern? Then depending on his reaction go to the police if it continues

LakieLady · 24/06/2021 07:53

@Icecreamsoda99

He sounds very reclusive, and it may well be the person you are hearing is a partner/siblings or parent with extreme agarophobia, doesn't have to be something sinister. Your best bet is to find a neighbour who has been there years and ask them if anyone else lives there.
Yes, agoraphobic sibling, and they hate each other, so sibling stays in their room except for when the neighbour goes to work.
StuffinThePuffin · 24/06/2021 07:53

I think you need to either contact the police and say you think someone is being kept prisoner in that house, or just forget about it.

No sense in worrying about it this much.

AlbusSeverusMalfoy · 24/06/2021 07:57

Maybe something/one is living in his loft and comes out when he's gone. Check your loft just in case.

Ponoka7 · 24/06/2021 07:58

My house often creaks as though someone is moving about. It did when I was a child and used to terrify me. The OP's imagination has run away with itself, so a noisy heating system or washing machine becomes running water. Or he could have a mate stay, unless the OP has him on 24 hour surveillance. Trees planted too close to houses are a pain and can do damage. I'm in the process of getting the housing association to have one removed from next door.

"Do you have any flaming torches? If so, you could put an unruly mob together."

Absolutely. He could have been through trauma and just wants a quiet life. Threads and opinions like these ones always sadden me. My adult DD, who is on the spectrum is often viewed as strange. So are her friends, some live alone. It's these sort of attitudes why people with conditions become even more isolated. Why can't we take people as we find them? He is kind, polite, works, doesn't cause any issues, yet is viewed with suspicion. If he was having parties, noisy/boozy BBQs at Easter, the neighbours would really have something to complain about. The LL has got a cheek. He could be behaving in a way that drives her tenants out. There's many threads on here about posters who would rather not celebrate Christmas because of the childhood memories, living with abuse/alcoholism etc. We don't have to live by a set of rules. Men are allowed to be single these days, it doesn't mean that they are deviant.

Lalliella · 24/06/2021 08:00

Is his name Jim? It’s probably Milson that you can hear.

Sarahlou63 · 24/06/2021 08:04

Next time you see him, casually mention that the local supermarket has a special offer on cat food and would he like you to get some? If he looks puzzled or asks why just say you often hear his cat during the day and see how reacts.

sammylady37 · 24/06/2021 08:07

I’m a very private person. I don’t have anything to hide but nonetheless I’m private and don’t particularly like people knowing my business. And I’m a bit of an introvert and a loner. Even pre-covid, it wasn’t unusual for me to come home from work on a Friday evening and not leave again til Monday morning. If a nosy neighbour approached me and started oh-so-innocently asking intrusive questions about who lived with me, they’d get very very short shrift.

WeatherwaxOn · 24/06/2021 08:07

@Lalliella

Is his name Jim? It’s probably Milson that you can hear.
Or the ghost of Wilson Grin
Beannag · 24/06/2021 08:11

@sammylady37

I’m a very private person. I don’t have anything to hide but nonetheless I’m private and don’t particularly like people knowing my business. And I’m a bit of an introvert and a loner. Even pre-covid, it wasn’t unusual for me to come home from work on a Friday evening and not leave again til Monday morning. If a nosy neighbour approached me and started oh-so-innocently asking intrusive questions about who lived with me, they’d get very very short shrift.
Do you have someone roaming around your house when you're out?
MumBowJumBow · 24/06/2021 08:11

Or he could be protecting somebody?

Doublestar · 24/06/2021 08:12

I doubt he's keeping a prisoner as the sensible thing for said prisoner to do would be shout "help"! And makes lots of noise when he's gone to work. Abductors don't generally allow their captives to have free reign of their house when they are out and help themselves to food in the kitchen cupboards (they shove a tray through a hole in the door, just enough food to keep them alive usually).

Is his name Norman Bates? Do you see a shadowy figure sat at the window (wearing a curly wig) when he's supposedly at work?

indecisivewoman81 · 24/06/2021 08:13

Omg @Babyjune21 that's horrific abs gave me goosebumps reading it!

I have to be honest; trust your gut. If the guy gives you the creeps but you can't white out your finger on it; if you hear noises when he is out, I'd say he could be hiding something.

I like the idea of calling the police and saying that you believe there is an intruder.

WeatherwaxOn · 24/06/2021 08:13

One thing that strikes me, OP is that you said you only hear the noise at night/when neighbour is out. However, you have also said that during the day there is a lot going on in your house so you wouldn't notice noises from next door.
So, you don't really have a comparison.
Neighbour could be moving around and talking to another person (and them answering) which would be perfectly normal.

butterpuffed · 24/06/2021 08:17

[quote Mikadua23]@FakingMemories I did message him first asking if he needed anything and then we arranged for shopping[/quote]
How did you message him, WhatsApp, text ? So you have his phone number ?
Instead of keeping his parcels at your house for days as he doesn't reply to a knock on his door, why not just message him or give him a call ?

Beetlewing · 24/06/2021 08:20

Sounds very much to me (speaking from experience) like he has an adult son living with him

EastWestWhosBest · 24/06/2021 08:21

@BishBashBoshBush

Do you hear water running? If it's someone secretly living there they would need to drink and wash when he's out. If you only hear water running when he's home then he would know there's someone there.
Oooh. Good point. Listen out for a toilet flush.
Fallsballs · 24/06/2021 08:26

I think you need to reassess who’s the “weirdo” in this situation OP.
You are the one listening at walls, watching his every move, offering him dinners, Googling him, making assumptions on his private life, you know how long his work shifts are and you are now making up stories about the noises you hear…take a deep breath and see if you can find something else to occupy your brain and leave the guy alone or move house.

lottiegarbanzo · 24/06/2021 08:26

It's Boo Radley.

sammylady37 · 24/06/2021 08:27

Do you have someone roaming around your house when you're out?

As it happens, yes, sometimes I do, despite living alone. Particularly at weekends. Would I explain to a nosy neighbour who they were or what the circumstances were? Absolutely not.

Catlover77 · 24/06/2021 08:27

I’m intrigued 🤔

AlternativePerspective · 24/06/2021 08:28

People do get far too carried away with these imaginative threads posted in the dead of night. Calling the police because the OP thinks someone is next door? Seriously.

If this is real then I would say my best bet would be that he cares for an ill relative and that a carer comes in at night when he’s working nights and is the one moving around. Just because you don’t see them arrive, doesn’t mean that they don’t.

Someone I used to work with said she heard a lot of noises in her neighbour’s house while they were at work. Turned out the neighbour was lending her house to a friend who was having an affair.

Of course it’s not going to be someone being held there if they have the run of the house while he’s out. They would just be able to get out then.

OP go back to the drawing board on this one. As a novel it doesn’t have much to keep the reader entertained.