Best/worst/untraceable revenge

[namechangeforwrongdoing]

Just tell me the best (worst?) but most untraceable acts of revenge/comeuppance that you've heard....Asking for a friend.....

I'm not proud but my exh was a violent and abusive alcoholic, he made mine and the kids lives a misery.

He made out he knew wine and claimed to drink 'quality' chardonnay and could tell a cheap bottle, anyway, one night he got horribly drunk, pissed on my hallway tiles, spent an hour telling me I was fat, useless and ugly, then passed out in a pool of vomit and pissed the bed... so I pissed in his bottle of wine (only a tiny bit) and then sealed it back up and put it in his wine fridge, the next day he finished the bottle.

I've genuinely never owned up to this before...

Shared university student house. One of the girls living there was unbearable, she was obnoxious, rude, never paid her bills, constantly ate other housemates food and just generally not a very nice person.

She had some annoying habits, one of them was piling all of her washing into the bath with half a box of washing powder and leaving it there overnight even though there was a washing machine in the kitchen meaning no-one could use the bath/shower (there was only one usable bathroom at the time between 6 people) in the morning without draining the tub and finding somewhere to put her manky washing.

One housemate got so fed up with this that the next time she did it (and every time after) she pissed in the bath full of washing and swilled it round with the toilet brush. The other girl none the wiser squeezed all of the 'water' out of her clothes without rinsing them and hung them up to dry in her room and then complained that her room and washing always smelled funny. Friend kept it up until the other girl moved out.

I had a line manager who wanted to cause me very significant damage by either having me fired (I gave no cause so she couldn't) or, when that failed, tried to have me blacklisted by the organisation we worked for. Literally threatened other managers in the organisation that they mustn't employ me...
On resigning from my position I applied for and got 3 other roles in the organisation, my new manager even let me know of her attempts.
The look on her face when she saw me in the canteen the next week...fucking priceless.
She was 'let go' a while later..

My older sister was a total psychopath to me when our mother died, and made my life a living hell. She wasn't particularly pleasant to anyone else either, but for me (mum's carer full time before she died) she reserved her purest bile and venom. She was visiting from overseas so staying in mum's house whilst we organised everything, and drinking quite regularly from a bottle of Old Navy rum in the evening. By the time she finished the bottle, it was only about 60% rum, the rest was piss. Cat piss.

My SIL had a revolting flatmate renting her spare room, he was a slob and rude and unbearable. When he move out, he left his bike behind (his pride and joy) to come back and get later and she took off the handlebars and shoved prawns into the frame of the bike. She also did something unspeakable with his toothbrush

I remember a thread ages ago where someone seeded the carpet and then watered it.

Good times.

**

My dh's ex took one disc out of all his dvd box sets 😂 I don't really know why though because she left him for someone else! It took years to click what she had done! Still think it's genius 🤣

I changed the alarm code when I moved out - he had to pay an emergency call-out charge to get it fixed!

I'm with the people who say living well is the best revenge. I was slowly pushed out of a job I was good at over a period of several years. The damage to my self-esteem and mental health was incalculable. However, I inherited enough money to change my life. I retired early, moved to a lovely area and bought a small and comfortable house. A former colleague, who is also a friend, is about to visit me and I'm going to make sure the person who pushed me out of my job gets to hear from her that I'm living my best life.

Next door lied about something, she tried to con the police.
They sat for 90 mins, then talked to us, OMG was what they said, told me she was nuts.
I put we are the champions on my phone as my ring tone.
She went nuts if she heard it, one day she went off outside our house over nothing, so I just filmed her on my phone, told her I would not hit her back, but I would press charges.
To this day she hates me, but I found out she has fallen out with everyone in our street, and everyone now just starts filming as soon as she gets cross.

Wow...admittedly a few of these have made me chuckle (the naked man wrapped in clingfilm especially) but others are shocking and im surprised how many posters like to take revenge using bodily fluids...

@TheBestRevenge im glad things have worked out so beautifully for you :)

@Bollindger

Next door lied about something, she tried to con the police. They sat for 90 mins, then talked to us, OMG was what they said, told me she was nuts. I put we are the champions on my phone as my ring tone. She went nuts if she heard it, one day she went off outside our house over nothing, so I just filmed her on my phone, told her I would not hit her back, but I would press charges. To this day she hates me, but I found out she has fallen out with everyone in our street, and everyone now just starts filming as soon as she gets cross.

I dont think this is revenge. This is more like protecting yourself against someone, and also antagonising them.

I don't think you need to become a super rich megastar to live well. I think you need to be happy in your life, whatever that looks like, to show someone who hurt you that they have no power over you. The benefit of this is that it doesn't remotely matter whether it bothers them or not - you are leading a content life. That's the ultimate victory over anyone.

@TheBestRevenge I love that. You sound happy. And deserve to be.

@NotPersephone

Suggested my ultimate fantasy was to shag him in the on top position while he was incapacitated by being wrapped in cling film.

Laughed my arse off watching him jump after me with his tiny, now-flaccid penis hanging out. (I’d already taken the precaution of filling all his coat pockets with Branston pickle in case he tried to follow me outside).

What had he done to you?

Friends of mine in student days.

A goes off to see his parents for the week. B & mates carefully brick up, plaster & paint the doorway to his room, then blankly deny they've ever met A when he returns & find his room no longer exists...

In retaliation, A got hold of & dismantled a foam fire extinguisher, the sort that works by mixing two fluids. One went into the cistern of B's ensuite bog, the other into the bowl. Apparently the subsequent flush was quite spectacular.

@HaroldMeeker

My older sister was a total psychopath to me when our mother died, and made my life a living hell. She wasn't particularly pleasant to anyone else either, but for me (mum's carer full time before she died) she reserved her purest bile and venom. She was visiting from overseas so staying in mum's house whilst we organised everything, and drinking quite regularly from a bottle of Old Navy rum in the evening. By the time she finished the bottle, it was only about 60% rum, the rest was piss. Cat piss.

How did you manage to get the cat to wee in the bottle? Very impressive

Genuinely think there are many many despicable people on MN if these posts are anything to go by. Makes for awful reading.

Rise above it and live your own life to the full. Maintaining your own dignity is the best revenge.

a friend a very long time ago was in a terrible relationship,Nowadays we would call it domestic abuse I guess anyway to cut a long story short she was so broken I kind of think her mind went a bit, After a terrible weekend her bully of a partner must have gone too far and she snapped,Now the only person this bully was afraid of was his own father apparently so she rang him to say she was at his parents house,She was,and he found her in bed with his dad,,,, He was apparently broken too after that, nuts the lot of them,I often wonder what became of her and if her life ever changed? I hope it did, I have to say I agree with most of the other posters,,move on be happy and leave the rats to sink their own ships!

Lol at all the pious posters suggesting the best option is to “live well.” Yeah, if you’re a millionaire I dare say you couldn’t give a shiny shit about enacting revenge on those who’ve pissed on your crumpets but for the ordinary folk out there revenge is the more practical & satisfying option (without the luxurious lifestyle & the dollars in the bank.)

@SynchroSwimmer

There was the story in the news a decade or more back... A husband who was proud of his extensive wine cellar, bottles accumulated over a period of time.

His ex wife distributed them, leaving them as doorstep deliveries next to the milk bottles - to every house in the village

I remember that-was she the same woman who cut one leg off each pair of his trousers?

@Topia

Lol at all the pious posters suggesting the best option is to “live well.” Yeah, if you’re a millionaire I dare say you couldn’t give a shiny shit about enacting revenge on those who’ve pissed on your crumpets but for the ordinary folk out there revenge is the more practical & satisfying option (without the luxurious lifestyle & the dollars in the bank.)

I don't think you've quite understood 😂

@trevthecat

My dh's ex took one disc out of all his dvd box sets 😂 I don't really know why though because she left him for someone else! It took years to click what she had done! Still think it's genius 🤣

She left him and you think what she did was "genius"?

get a stitch ripper, and take out every 3rd stitch in their clothes.. enough so they don't fall apart UNTIL THEY WEAR THEM.

What'll happen is the clothes will slowly start to unravel/fall off over the day.

The nearest I got to revenge was to put keywords in white text on emails I sent to my ex. I started this about 3 or 4 months before I left his abusive arse, so when ad's started popping up, he didn't connect it to me leaving.

I know it irritated him to have these ads pop up, but he wasn't tech savvy and never worked it out.