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AIBU?

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Original poster

Awkward Work Moment 🙄

189 replies

Movinbaby · 17/06/2021 18:25

I am getting really tired of my work colleague. She is always talking about her personal life and her husband who she makes sound awful. She has been with the company for 3 years and it's all she talks about. She seems to need the attention. What is worse is she takes liberties all the time. Currently it's taking well over her 30 minute lunch. She goes out of the office, which is her choice but spends around 45 minutes. She goes to the GP, the supermarkets all at a distance and then comes back and eats her lunch whilst working but she likes to chat so isn't really working and this disturbs everyone else who are working. Well today she was gone for an hour and the receptionist called me as she was truly concerned about her. She didn't sign out of the building. The colleague walked back in having been home (some distance) made a sandwich etc. I was on the call to the receptionist as she walked in so when I ended the call I told her that she was worried as she had been gone so long. Before I knew what I was saying, I had told her that it really was unfair that she keeps taking so long for lunch when everyone only gets 30 minutes. There was no reason other than "I went home to get some money and then decided to make a sandwich" I told her that she did this every day and that she only gets 30 minutes like I do. I just could not stop myself. Its not just that but she comes to work and does her makeup for 10 minutes every morning. I did tell her that people are noticing and it's only a matter of Time before they report it to the boss. What she doesn't know is the receptionist had to tell the boss as she didn't sign out of the building and they need to know this.

Anyways, it was very uncomfortable after and she sulked all afternoon and kept making snide comments about working her time back etc.

Whoops 🤭

OP posts:
randomkey123 · 17/06/2021 21:37

I run a business with my DH. If we get 5 minutes to wash a sandwich down with a hot cup of tea we consider ourselves blessed.

Our staff get half an hour and that's plenty of time.

Standrewsschool · 17/06/2021 21:52

@Doodlebug71

A 30 minute lunch? Seriously? How are people supposed to relax, eat and digest/be ready to return to work in 30 minutes? I take at least an hour for lunch. 10-15 minutes to prepare the food, then time to eat. That's not possible within a 30 minute time frame. Who are these companies?
I have a 30 minute lunch also. I take sandwiches into work, prepared before having breakfast. I thought 30 minutes was the norm nowadays.
Muchmorethan · 17/06/2021 21:53

@Doodlebug71

A 30 minute lunch? Seriously? How are people supposed to relax, eat and digest/be ready to return to work in 30 minutes? I take at least an hour for lunch. 10-15 minutes to prepare the food, then time to eat. That's not possible within a 30 minute time frame. Who are these companies?
I have only ever had 30mins for lunch. NHS worker.
QueenBee52 · 17/06/2021 21:58

30 min lunch here too 🕜

Unusualusernames · 17/06/2021 22:02

In the nicest possible way if you're not her manager and her taking the piss doesn't actually affect your workload I think your reaction was a bit unreasonable (albeit I get that sometimes we just loose it).

I've managed piss takers. Admittedly I'm not the best manager but it is really hard.

Gonewiththegin · 17/06/2021 22:07

It might not be fair OP but at the end of the day the issue is with your manager. He is more than aware and has done nothing.

I can see it from both sides- your colleague will continue to take longer lunches if she is never questioned or advised that it’s not acceptable to continually go over her break times. She may not be aware but also likely she is fully aware and the lunches will get longer and longer.

Have to say though if your workload is different can you really say she’s not being productive the rest of the time? The job must be being done unless your manager really is incompetent. Also there could be personal reasons and your manager and colleague may have agreed on her extended breaks and neither would need to disclose why so you don’t feel hard done by.

Haffiana · 17/06/2021 22:08

It isn't your job to tell a co-worker off about how long they take for lunch or to threaten them with the whole telling the boss thing.

The receptionist however should be disciplined for gossiping to you ON THE PHONE IN COMPANY TIME about what someone else is doing, and for telling YOU that she has reported it to the boss.

So, so unprofessional.

Persephoned · 17/06/2021 22:09

Wow. This makes me wonder what history will look back on in 100 years time! Life is short, really don’t get hung up on what you do or don’t think someone’s said. Who monitors their colleagues lunch??? And how weird to think it’s okay to do that

pinkmagnolias · 17/06/2021 22:13

The receptionist sounds incredibly unprofessional. I’m at a loss as to what business it is of hers as to who leaves the building and for how long unless she is taking messages for them or there are visitors waiting in reception for that person to return.

Grastenia · 17/06/2021 22:15

There was no reason other than "I went home to get some money and then decided to make a sandwich"

What's her roll?

Sorry, what is her role for the company? She sounds terribly disorganised and I trust not in any strategic role or day to day operational role.

Or anywhere in between for that matter.

FangsForTheMemory · 17/06/2021 22:17

Hm. I've had easy-going managers but once you crossed the line with them, you'd find they were not so easy going after after all! I would not have given this woman a warning, I would have complained to her manager, or let the receptionist do so. If she continues to snipe, I'd pull her up on it too.

Onairjunkie · 17/06/2021 22:20

I know you’re looking for back-patting here but I actually don’t think you handled that very well. I tan or your place to give her a public dressing down.

Drivingmeupthewall · 17/06/2021 22:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Confusedandshaken · 17/06/2021 22:29

I'm very impressed that you said anything at all OP and even more impressed that you said it calmly and politely. You didn't 'tell her off' as such. You told her it wasn't fair on you and others, that people had noticed and she would get into trouble with management if it went on. You could have bitched and snitched behind her back. Your way was much more straightforward and honest.

MossRock · 17/06/2021 22:32

Late to this but I don’t think you did anything wrong. You weren’t rude or offensive, just honest. She a cheeky fucker and it’s about time she heard it.

Don’t feel bad OP!

Newschapter · 17/06/2021 22:38

@Movinbaby

I bet you were class captain and prefect at school...

Unless you're her line manager then don't worry about it.

My colleague used to do the same, but it took a while for us to realise she'd agreed it with the boss as she had health issues, we didn't need to know her business!

ispepsiokay · 17/06/2021 22:39

I think you did the right thing, it's wrong of her to take extended breaks leaving others to pick up the slack (answering phones etc), this needs to be addressed.

MustardRose · 17/06/2021 22:59

@pinkmagnolias

The receptionist sounds incredibly unprofessional. I’m at a loss as to what business it is of hers as to who leaves the building and for how long unless she is taking messages for them or there are visitors waiting in reception for that person to return.
The receptionist has the the signing in and out book and would take it with her or him to the fire assembly point if the fire alarm goes off.

People could lose their lives searching a burning building for someone who isn't there.

Shehasadiamondinthesky · 17/06/2021 23:04

I loathe pisstakers it disrupts the entire team - it should be reported because she is paid to work a full day not part of a day and the endless yacking would drive me to drink.
I work in the NHS and I'm sick to death of the shirkers, the rest of us have to work double time to make up for it.
Off sick every 5 minutes, taking lengthy lunch breaks, constantly asking for 45 minutes or 1 hour for patients who should take no longer than 30 minutes.
I think management should come down hard on this kind of thing.

FlamingoQueen · 17/06/2021 23:07

I think I used to work with her!

SD1978 · 17/06/2021 23:13

It wasn't, and is t your place to have any kind of chat with her regarding her timekeeping, or ask her to work back time spent out of the office. All you can do is escalate your concerns and frustrations and leave it to someone in seniority to deal with. If they do t, it's still not your place to, regardless of how frustrating you find the situation.

Ilovesandwiches · 17/06/2021 23:21

Completely see your frustrations, if nobody else gets an hour why does she!

Original poster
Movinbaby · 17/06/2021 23:22

@Onairjunkie no back patting required here. I didn't feel good about it but felt that talking behind her back or running to management wasn't the best option either. I am interested to know what you would have done differently?

OP posts:
Original poster
Movinbaby · 17/06/2021 23:24

By the way, I think someone asked the receptionist where she was. Part of her role is PA to a senior member of staff. I could be wrong but seems logical?

Having read all your comments I actually feel.okay with what I said. If it continues and its still affecting me, I will go to management.

OP posts:
Onairjunkie · 17/06/2021 23:27

I would have taken it to a senior member of staff and reported it that way, if it’s bothering you all that much. Perhaps ‘the boss’ of which you speak.
It was not your place to dress her down, unless you are her line manager. And even if you were, you absolutely do not dress staff down in public. It is deeply unprofessional. They have the right to answer any accusations and in private.