Awkward Work Moment 🙄

[Movinbaby]

I am getting really tired of my work colleague. She is always talking about her personal life and her husband who she makes sound awful. She has been with the company for 3 years and it's all she talks about. She seems to need the attention. What is worse is she takes liberties all the time. Currently it's taking well over her 30 minute lunch. She goes out of the office, which is her choice but spends around 45 minutes. She goes to the GP, the supermarkets all at a distance and then comes back and eats her lunch whilst working but she likes to chat so isn't really working and this disturbs everyone else who are working. Well today she was gone for an hour and the receptionist called me as she was truly concerned about her. She didn't sign out of the building. The colleague walked back in having been home (some distance) made a sandwich etc. I was on the call to the receptionist as she walked in so when I ended the call I told her that she was worried as she had been gone so long. Before I knew what I was saying, I had told her that it really was unfair that she keeps taking so long for lunch when everyone only gets 30 minutes. There was no reason other than "I went home to get some money and then decided to make a sandwich" I told her that she did this every day and that she only gets 30 minutes like I do. I just could not stop myself. Its not just that but she comes to work and does her makeup for 10 minutes every morning. I did tell her that people are noticing and it's only a matter of Time before they report it to the boss. What she doesn't know is the receptionist had to tell the boss as she didn't sign out of the building and they need to know this.

Anyways, it was very uncomfortable after and she sulked all afternoon and kept making snide comments about working her time back etc.

Whoops 🤭

[PurplePansy05]

Completely agree with Onairjunkie on this. I really cannot imagine someone who isn't in a more senior role assuming it's their place to have this type of conversation with a colleague
However, you seem content with your decision so that's that really, isn't it.

[pilates]

Dress her down, tell her off, flying off the handle; that’s not what I read. The op calmly stated facts which the recipient didn’t like because the truth sometimes hurts. You have brought it to her attention and, if it continues, I would take it up with management. Hopefully, she may attempt to change her ways without the need to do this but I doubt it because those sort of people rarely do. I sympathise with you as it is extremely frustrating as I think we have all worked with someone like that.

[Movinbaby]

@pilates Yep I am not sure that I even mentioned that I spoke about it in public. I didn't, by the way. I did not dress her down, nor accuse, or even raise a slight voice. I appreciate the comments but it looks like they haven't really read my posts. I am not trying to be senior I just thought it unfair, especially as it affected me whilst she was gone making a sandwich at her hoise 20 minutes drive away. She is a piss taker and maybe being told that (in a nice way!) Was all someone needed to do without getting her in trouble with management. Anyway, it's been said now so it is what it is. 🤷

[BonnieDundee]

YANBU OP. We've all worked with pisstakers. Lazy fuckers

[nanbread]

I find it strange that you want more rules, why can't someone have lunch at 11.30 if they want? If she's getting her work done by taking it home and having a bit longer for lunch, what difference does it really make? I hate these kind of school timetable attitudes and think as adults we should be allowed a bit of flexibility in how we arrange our lives as long as we're getting our work done. It doesn't even sound like her work is related to yours which makes it even more petty.

On the flipside, her absence does mean you answer the phone more which impacts on your workload and it would have been ok to bring that up, I would have maybe said "can I leave it to you to answer any reception calls for the next hour as I really need to get on with X" or whatever.

And as for the talking too much etc, there's at least one of these in pretty much every office. There are lots of ways you can deal with them.

[whatwasIgoingtosay]

I really admire you for bringing this up with the CF calmly and absolutely think you did the right thing! Survey after survey has shown that one of the biggest reasons for low morale and discontent in the workplace is the perception that management will not address the issue of lazy staff who will not pull their weight. As schoolchildren we all expected our teachers to be fair in the way they handled others (OK, lots were not) and to protect us from those who disrupted lessons etc and as adults we have the right to expect the same. Those posters who are outraged and accusing you of bullying and harassment are the ones getting things out of proportion - not you.

[tigger1001]

@Doodlebug71

A 30 minute lunch? Seriously? How are people supposed to relax, eat and digest/be ready to return to work in 30 minutes? I take at least an hour for lunch. 10-15 minutes to prepare the food, then time to eat. That's not possible within a 30 minute time frame. Who are these companies?

I take a 30 minute lunch break. Usually go out for a short walk and then sit and eat a sandwich/salad etc.

Make food? This is done at home and just heated if necessary in the microwave.

30 minutes is a perfect lunch break for me.

[DynamoKev]

@socalledfriend

You have a shit manager problem.

Yep!

[Movinbaby]

@whatwasIgoingtosay thanks for the positive comments. I was unsure at first if I had done the right thing hence my post. I do agree with your comments.

@nanbread All offices should have some simple rules to follow otherwise you end up feeling resentful and confused not knowing where the boundaries are. Of course she can take her lunch when she wants, as can I within reason but the length of time she was gone did impact on me and remember, this has been going of for months.
She has to work at home out of work time because she isn't getting it done in work time. That's concerning isn't it. If she had the extra half hour she may have no need to work from home. Now do you still think it was petty? How would you feel if you couldn't get your work done because someone was wanting an extra 30 minutes lunch so she could go home and make a sandwich?

[Movinbaby]

Anyways, here is an update.... she took 30 minutes for her lunch today!🤔🙄😅.

[NeverDropYourMoonCup]

It's part of a receptionists job to ensure that people sign in and out of premises in case there is an emergency, such as a fire.


She would therefore have been in massive trouble had she not recorded this person leaving without signing out. Massive trouble.

[Haffiana]

She would be in massive trouble for taking it on herself to monitor how long people are out of the building and then telephoning random colleagues and gossiping with them about how long people were out of the building. Thereby wasting not only her own time but also OPs who took the call and also gossiped. Instead of doing her job.

That would be a disciplinary in many work environments.

[BronwenFrideswide]

@Movinbaby

Anyways, here is an update.... she took 30 minutes for her lunch today!🤔🙄😅.

[ClutchesPearlsAndFaints]

Result then
I think it's difficult when you are faced with a situation like this not to say anything. I would have
It's taking the piss and being disrespectful to everyone

[ApolloandDaphne]

You obviously solved the issue so well done. Better to have told her to her face rather than going behind her back to your boss.

[Groovee]

@Doodlebug71

A 30 minute lunch? Seriously? How are people supposed to relax, eat and digest/be ready to return to work in 30 minutes? I take at least an hour for lunch. 10-15 minutes to prepare the food, then time to eat. That's not possible within a 30 minute time frame. Who are these companies?

A school for starters. Oh to be able to have an hour!

[Buttercup1954]

I've worked with people like that. They make you feel so irritated and if you complain you are the bad person. The rules are the rules and they're there for a reason. Then they make you feel guilty for feeling that way but it doesn't make for a happy workplace. You did the right thing.

[peppermintpat]

I'm glad you spoke out. If things don't change in the future go further. It's unfair she gets paid for time she's not actually working.

[Mumofferalkids]

Can’t believe someone is shocked at people having 30 min lunches, in 20 years I have never worked anywhere that people regularly have longer

[godmum56]

@whatwasIgoingtosay

I really admire you for bringing this up with the CF calmly and absolutely think you did the right thing! Survey after survey has shown that one of the biggest reasons for low morale and discontent in the workplace is the perception that management will not address the issue of lazy staff who will not pull their weight. As schoolchildren we all expected our teachers to be fair in the way they handled others (OK, lots were not) and to protect us from those who disrupted lessons etc and as adults we have the right to expect the same. Those posters who are outraged and accusing you of bullying and harassment are the ones getting things out of proportion - not you.

but we don't expect school children to police one another. And if you are meaning me, I did not accuse her of bullying or harrassment, I warned her that her co-worker could and that it could get her into trouble.

[Flossatops]

I'd certainly be annoyed, especially as it happens all the time. I wonder if your receptionist is one of those clever (sneaky?) people who load the gun for someone else to fire the bullet, rather than facing the situation themselves? I have a work colleague who does that and is therefore never the one having awkward conversations.

[woodhill]

You did say she was doing some work at home, is this in her own time? Is she making up the time?

I'm lucky I get an hour but would rather leave earlier tbh

[PlsSendWine]

Sorry OP, I think you are completely entitled to be annoyed however you have been used by the receptionist to air her grievances so you look like the bad guy while solving her problem for her. I’ve made this mistake a number of times and regretted it (seems I wasn’t a fast enough learner). I hate office politics. Her manager (who the receptionist should have contacted!) is clearly a bit of a jobsworth if this has been going on for months.

[purplecorkheart]

Does your colleague have meetings etc that she is late for or unprepared for? Clients often take their frustrations at late meetings etc out on receptionist who had no control over people taking the piss. Bare in mind your colleague crap is probably making the lady or gent's day to day hell.

[skodadoda]

@Faranth

Of course she didn't sign out, she'd have had to put the time down, wouldn't she? Then her overly long lunchbreak would have been recorded in black and white.

I've worked with someone like this OP. It's horrid, when you're a team all working from a 'pool' of work, someone bogging off to faff with their hair every half hour, or taking twice their alloted lunchbreak, or generally shirking means everyone else has to do more to pick up the slack. Of course it breeds resentment. But bringing it up feels petty.

I've also worked somewhere that the receptionists had to sign you in and out, it's not unusual. It's usually for h&s reasons. It was a large site with lots of out of the way places and machinery etc. They needed to know who was on site on case of an evacuation, to make sure everyone got out or was searched for if there was a fire, or similar.

Very well put