Awkward Work Moment 🙄

[Movinbaby]

I am getting really tired of my work colleague. She is always talking about her personal life and her husband who she makes sound awful. She has been with the company for 3 years and it's all she talks about. She seems to need the attention. What is worse is she takes liberties all the time. Currently it's taking well over her 30 minute lunch. She goes out of the office, which is her choice but spends around 45 minutes. She goes to the GP, the supermarkets all at a distance and then comes back and eats her lunch whilst working but she likes to chat so isn't really working and this disturbs everyone else who are working. Well today she was gone for an hour and the receptionist called me as she was truly concerned about her. She didn't sign out of the building. The colleague walked back in having been home (some distance) made a sandwich etc. I was on the call to the receptionist as she walked in so when I ended the call I told her that she was worried as she had been gone so long. Before I knew what I was saying, I had told her that it really was unfair that she keeps taking so long for lunch when everyone only gets 30 minutes. There was no reason other than "I went home to get some money and then decided to make a sandwich" I told her that she did this every day and that she only gets 30 minutes like I do. I just could not stop myself. Its not just that but she comes to work and does her makeup for 10 minutes every morning. I did tell her that people are noticing and it's only a matter of Time before they report it to the boss. What she doesn't know is the receptionist had to tell the boss as she didn't sign out of the building and they need to know this.

Anyways, it was very uncomfortable after and she sulked all afternoon and kept making snide comments about working her time back etc.

Whoops 🤭

[AnAwesomePossum]

If she does a different job, are you sure she’s on the same ‘30 min break’?

I work in the same team as a number of others. All the admin need to have a strict rota position. Some with another particular area that does specialist work. My job is projects so I basically do whatever I need to - so often work late when I have additional work, go out for hour long lunch breaks or start later/leave earlier when I don’t. Is it that kind of set up of is it set working patterns?

[pinkmagnolias]

Where I previously worked, we had to swipe our ID cards over sensors to enter and exit the building for security reasons but also so security would know how many were in the building at any time presumably.

I worked with someone who used go to the onsite gym during lunch and take up to two hours every day. It is very demoralising when you see a colleague completely taking the piss like that.

However, I think the right way to go about rectifying the issue would have been to mention it to management as it has now created an atmosphere. with a peer. Then again, her behaviour had already created an atmosphere and she was only 'getting away' with it as nobody had pulled her up on it.
I'd mention it to the manager of the dept.

As an aside thirty minutes is a very short lunch break. I can understand why people would eat at their desks rather than bother going out for such a short amount of time.

[icelollycraving]

Does your line manager not notice this pisstaking?
I think it’s fine to say how you feel. I’d feel irritated too.

[godmum56]

As a retired manager I am going to say dump this on the person whose responsibility it is. By all means say to the pain in the butt that you find talking and doing your job difficult and decline conversation. If she is making YOUR work more difficult or you are having to do more work because she does less then dump that on the manager...what happens between her and receptionist...not your monkey.....her skiving.....not your monkey. The reason I say this is because folk of this ilk aren't above claiming that you are harrassing or bullying her and then you are in the poo and no paddle. Honestly, bite your tongue and stick to the official route.

[DiamondBright]

This is why, when I was office based, I rarely left the office at lunchtime and would either have a lunch break on my way back from a meeting off site or just eat at my desk.

[Groovee]

I'd speak to your manager. Our breaks need to be strict due to covering ratios and my manager noticed that one of the team was taking too long. She then spoke to the person concerned and monitors it.

[IdblowJonSnow]

Yanbu. Agree it's part of the receptionists role to know who is in and out of building.

Hopefully management will step in now.

I'd take a huge step back, ignore her comments and hope that it's now dealt with properly.

[pumpkintree]

@Movinbaby

Well its getting me down so I did have a word with her. I wanted to do this first to her face rather than report to management. Its very frustrating when you are sticking to the rules and someone else just flaunts them. Regardless if anyone else was bothered by it, I am bothered.

Do you know she hasn't 100% agreed to a longer lunch and work back to for medical reasons?

[Movinbaby]

Just to answer some of your questions- she is on the same fixed rota as me, start at 8am leave atb4pm with 30 minutes for lunch. We are free to make drinks when we want one.

Our manager is often away from his desk but I don't believe he hasn't noticed it. He is very, very easy going and often doesn't address things and the office is not like anywhere I have worked before. This isn't always a bad thing as he never micromanage us. Sometimes though the office becomes a bit of a free for all. I think this is why she feels she can do what she wants. Today, she didn't even leave at lunch time. It was at 11.30am but she decided she wanted to take it then. My other colleague had lunch at 12pm so only I was left. I am very busy at the moment and the phone was ringing non stop. Our boss doesn't tell us when to take our lunch and leaves most decisions like thus, to us. I would just like a few more rules, not a dictatorship but just some guidelines.

The reason for my post is that I have done nothing but think about it all day. It's not like me to tell anyone and if I am honest, I wasn't sure it was the right thing to do. I just got mad and out it came 😒

[FierceBarrie]

Her phone left going unanswered for an hour?

Where is your manager in all of this?

[80Days]

@ladysunshine

This is a huge health & safety issue. If a fire drill was called, she would be registered as missing, presumed still in building. In the event of a real fire, people would be risking their lives to find her.

This is exactly why everyone had to sign in and out at my previous workplace, even if they were just popping out of the building for 5 minutes.

The receptionist was also responsible for providing the list of everyone in the building to the fire marshalls when there were fire drills, so making sure people sign in / out correctly was part of the receptionists job from a health and safety point of view.

This might be the case for the receptionist at OPs workplace too.
And it might have been an awkward conversation, but it might make the pisstaking colleague rethink her behaviour before management pick up on it.

[FierceBarrie]

Cross-posted.

Ah, an ‘easy going’ manager.

Code for - ineffectual, and doesn’t actually want to manage, just wants to get paid the big bucks.

This is his problem to sort.

[SarahBellam]

If it didn’t impact on my workload I wouldn’t give a stuff. If it did I’d go straight to management. It’s not my job to manage piss taking staff.

[Movinbaby]

Yes it's the same at our place. The receptionist would have been in trouble and asked how the colleague had got past her without signing out.

[bringincrazyback]

YANBU to be irritated by it, she's taking the proverbial (except people do sometimes need GP appts in work time). But it doesn't sound like you have the seniority to pull her up on it (unless I've missed something) so although I get your reasons for doing so, maybe it would have been better to have left well alone. If she carries on like this it'll start to piss management off soon enough anyway.

[Srslydontgiveacrap]

@ladysunshine

This is a huge health & safety issue. If a fire drill was called, she would be registered as missing, presumed still in building. In the event of a real fire, people would be risking their lives to find her.

Oh give over

[pilates]

Good for you op. Better to address it direct than bitch behind her back.

[godmum56]

@Movinbaby

Just to answer some of your questions- she is on the same fixed rota as me, start at 8am leave atb4pm with 30 minutes for lunch. We are free to make drinks when we want one.

Our manager is often away from his desk but I don't believe he hasn't noticed it. He is very, very easy going and often doesn't address things and the office is not like anywhere I have worked before. This isn't always a bad thing as he never micromanage us. Sometimes though the office becomes a bit of a free for all. I think this is why she feels she can do what she wants. Today, she didn't even leave at lunch time. It was at 11.30am but she decided she wanted to take it then. My other colleague had lunch at 12pm so only I was left. I am very busy at the moment and the phone was ringing non stop. Our boss doesn't tell us when to take our lunch and leaves most decisions like thus, to us. I would just like a few more rules, not a dictatorship but just some guidelines.

The reason for my post is that I have done nothing but think about it all day. It's not like me to tell anyone and if I am honest, I wasn't sure it was the right thing to do. I just got mad and out it came 😒

If you want more break and lunch guidance then talk to your boss and ask for clarity....I have already explained that, while your reaction is understandable, it wasn't the right thing to do.

[PurplePansy05]

Whilst it can be irritating, you're not her manager. You're in no position to lecture her, it's not your job. Personally, I'd have stayed away from it, it's clearly been noticed already and her lateness is being monitored and someone appropriate likely have a word with her. I don't see the point in you getting involved at all.

FWIW, I would hate a workplace where co-workers monitor each other's breaks, but maybe it's because I'm in the environment where we all put many extra hours and no one, including my boss, would bat an eyelid at a longer lunch break.

[AnAwesomePossum]

With your update, YANBU. Tell your manager about how it’s affecting you and your workload though (frequently left for long periods of times taking all the calls and it’s making it harder for you to get x jobs done) rather than making it sound like you just don’t like the colleague (even though I wouldn’t like them in your position).

[Movinbaby]

I think you are all right. It is up to my boss to deal with this, not me. He told me once that she had been moved from her shared office downstairs to our office because the other managers said she was talking too much. He knows what she is like. Telling the whole office about having to have an abortion😬. Other people in the office are talking about her (not me). But that's up to them to do something about.

[HollowTalk]

But it is the OP's business if she's having to pick up the phone calls that the other woman should be answering.

[Movinbaby]

Yes I guess it's not my position to tell her. It just came out before I could control myself. I don't know why it gets to me but it does. Maybe it's more than just her pass taking?!

[LadyPoison]

I've always had to sign in and out of the office although I am not accountable for the time I spend in the office due to my job role.

It is just a H&S thing as others have said. It is of course perfectly possible that management have already noticed the time being stolen and the receptionist asked to record her comings and goings in order to start disciplinary action

[Movinbaby]

Urgghhh I really hate office life. Its just not for me. I seem to struggle with the dynamics and its only me that gets fed up and ends up saying what I am feeling instead of just ignoring it and carrying on. I just want things to be fair and I know that its not fair nor equal. Anyone got a non-office based job going 🤣🙄🤪