People complaining about ‘not’ being able to have a wedding

[JackieWeaverHandforthCouncil]

Am I the only person who’s getting a bit annoyed with all the people whining about ‘not’ being able to have a wedding?

They can get married and the limits of max 30 will go but guests have to socially distance, there will be limits on singing and you can’t have international guests.

Yes you can’t have 100 people hugging but people have always been allowed to get married throughout the pandemic.

There was a woman complaining on the press conference that she’s being prevented from moving on with her life? Another was saying not being able to get married is giving her mental health issues. How? She can still get married, it may not be the Insta wedding she expected but the legal bit can still happen. Have the party bit later.

I feel a lot more sorrow for people trying to organise funerals who can’t have all the guests they want.

[quote BeckyWithTheCurls]@DrSbaitso of course I meant the marriage [/quote]
I know, I was being facetious. But I'm really tired of this constant implication on the thread that anyone who is upset about having their wedding fucked over like this must be an idiot who's spending obscene amounts of money on a princess fantasy when they're doomed to divorce within a year.

Yes, it irritates me to. I cancelled my wedding due to Covid- it was disappointing but hey that’s life. Tbh this obsession with weddings is bizarre - it’s not like we are living in the Middle Ages- a women’s worth is not based on her marital status. I just don’t get why some people can’t be happy with graduating uni, buying your first house, having a child, how would having a 1 day party for a load of people you barely know be any better? How are these women measuring their self worth?

@Thevoiceofreason2021

Yes, it irritates me to. I cancelled my wedding due to Covid- it was disappointing but hey that’s life. Tbh this obsession with weddings is bizarre - it’s not like we are living in the Middle Ages- a women’s worth is not based on her marital status. I just don’t get why some people can’t be happy with graduating uni, buying your first house, having a child, how would having a 1 day party for a load of people you barely know be any better? How are these women measuring their self worth?

Is the obsession with weddings as bizarre as yur misogyny?

Some lovely assumptions there. What about the Groom’s self worth?

@Thevoiceofreason2021

Yes, it irritates me to. I cancelled my wedding due to Covid- it was disappointing but hey that’s life. Tbh this obsession with weddings is bizarre - it’s not like we are living in the Middle Ages- a women’s worth is not based on her marital status. I just don’t get why some people can’t be happy with graduating uni, buying your first house, having a child, how would having a 1 day party for a load of people you barely know be any better? How are these women measuring their self worth?

Not everyone goes to uni, not everyone can buy a house, not everyone can have a child - why on earth do you consider them measures of self worth over getting married?

Self worth shouldn't come from what you do, it should come from within.

Some lovely assumptions there. What about the Groom’s self worth?

I'm guessing 'the voice of reason' believes they have that by virtue of having a penis

I just don’t get why some people can’t be happy with graduating uni, buying your first house, having a child, how would having a 1 day party for a load of people you barely know be any better?

I don't even know where to start with the level of ignorant privilege and assumption in this. And why are you inviting people you barely know if you don't care about having them there?

How are these women measuring their self worth?

Hopefully not by listening to your sexism.

@DrSbaitso I know you were being facetious, actually made me chuckle! That really would have been some party!

why some people can’t be happy with graduating uni, buying your first house, having a child, how would having a 1 day party for a load of people you barely know be any better? How are these women measuring their self worth?

😂 😂 😂

gosh you must have such a sad existence, or you are clutching at straw to comfort yourself about your own failure.

You know you can do ALL these things? And if you are not a misery gut, you have plenty of people you actually care for to invite.

Sounds like some people are bitterly realising that even if they wanted to, they couldn't have more than a handful of people to invite. Bit sad.

@Thevoiceofreason2021

Yes, it irritates me to. I cancelled my wedding due to Covid- it was disappointing but hey that’s life. Tbh this obsession with weddings is bizarre - it’s not like we are living in the Middle Ages- a women’s worth is not based on her marital status. I just don’t get why some people can’t be happy with graduating uni, buying your first house, having a child, how would having a 1 day party for a load of people you barely know be any better? How are these women measuring their self worth?

What are you on about?

Those things aren't less important just because you get married.

Me getting married is absolutely nothing to do with my "status" I just love my partner, we want to be married.

What a fucking bizarre post.

[quote Chailatteplease]@silverspider05 that’s so disgustingly ignorant it’s beyond comprehension. You assume I haven’t had to suck up shit things in life? Had many, many times I’ve had to “pull up big girl knickers” just because I’m upset about my wedding?
You haven’t even considered that maybe I’ve had such horrible shit happen in my life that now things are going good, I’d like to celebrate with my nearest and dearest.
Fucking hell, you’re unbelievable![/quote]
Actually many people, not just you, have had such horrible shit happen in their life and have had to put on their big girl pants, myself included. That doesn't make me ignorant. Quite the opposite infact. You are making the assumption I haven't and look at everything through rose tinted specs hey. Have you considered the fact that there is a pandemic going on still? People are dying still? Vulnerable people are still (oh my god who would have guessed it) vulnerable? People have lost their houses, jobs, livelihoods, family members, ability to travel to other countries to see family? Children and babies have had virtually no social interactions? People are being kicked out onto the streets? Mental health issues are spiralling and not everyone has access to services because they are strained as it is? Yes being able to celebrate is lovely and everything, but risking people's lives for it is not worth it. You make out like I thrive on this shit. I fucking don't. Losing a deposit is much better than losing a loved one I shit you not. Oh yes, another assumption you have made is that I haven't myself lost the deposit on the venue I really wanted and now they have put the prices up to extortionate levels so we can't afford it anymore. My brother and his fiancé too have had to cancel everything. But carry on make me out to be a bad person because I don't agree with your sentiments of having a hundred people attend your wedding during a fucking pandemic and potentially spreading the virus further because I think its selfish as fuck. Lose the fucking money you still have each other right? Everyone deserves happiness but not at the expense of others. And your calling me unbelievable? Wind your neck in love.

But carry on make me out to be a bad person because I don't agree with your sentiments of having a hundred people attend your wedding during a fucking pandemic and potentially spreading the virus further because I think its selfish as fuck.

Being sad/disappointed that you can’t have your wedding isn’t the same as thinking you should be allowed to have it, though. You can understand and agree with and support all the restrictions and still be sad that your wedding can’t happen.

I was 100% in support of all the lockdowns. Got why they had to happen, understood why we couldn’t have our wedding, knew that we were keeping everyone safe by not having it. Doesn’t mean I wasn’t still sad and disappointed about it.

@FirewomanSam

But carry on make me out to be a bad person because I don't agree with your sentiments of having a hundred people attend your wedding during a fucking pandemic and potentially spreading the virus further because I think its selfish as fuck.

Being sad/disappointed that you can’t have your wedding isn’t the same as thinking you should be allowed to have it, though. You can understand and agree with and support all the restrictions and still be sad that your wedding can’t happen.

I was 100% in support of all the lockdowns. Got why they had to happen, understood why we couldn’t have our wedding, knew that we were keeping everyone safe by not having it. Doesn’t mean I wasn’t still sad and disappointed about it.

I haven't said in any of my posts you can't be sad or upset about it.

The issue is that people are always going to die of infectious disease. This one and others. So where do you draw the line?

When it's not considered a pandemic?

I agree. But I can see a hell of a lot disagree too.

I'm fed up of listening to the moaning. The most important part should be the couple getting married and your closest family and friends to share it with

Im fed up of listening to the moanin

The only people i hear moaning are the ones moaning about , the moaners.
Ive never heard anyone moan about their wedding being cancelled, neither on here, the news or in real life, one poor colleague wedding was first week of lockdown

Lots of really mean spirited people out there.

@bruffin

Im fed up of listening to the moanin

The only people i hear moaning are the ones moaning about , the moaners.
Ive never heard anyone moan about their wedding being cancelled, neither on here, the news or in real life, one poor colleague wedding was first week of lockdown

OP has been hearing them, though. That's what the whole opening post was about.

MN can be great for widening one's horizons (most friendship,groups are more endogamous that we like to think) so it's always interesting to see how life is from other people's shoes.

Even if your life does not contain people sounding off about their circumstances, is it so hard to believe these people exist? Or do you think the news report was staged wth an actor?

OP has been hearing them, though.

She read about it in the Daily Mail. To say that paper has an anti-woman agenda is an understatement. It will have deliberately sought out and published the most provocative statements it could get, most likely entirely out of context.

@Twinkie01

YANBU - the pandemic has distinguished between those who want to be married vs those who want to be a special princess centre of attention for the day.

^ totally agree.

Marriage is about 2 people making certain promises to each other in front of an official, the rest is just window dressing, often expensive window dressing which people think they have to have and often go into debt for.

Marriage is about 2 people making certain promises to each other in front of an official, the rest is just window dressing

Might be for you. Isn't for everyone.

For some people the registry bit is a social formality with no real resonance at all. The significant bit is the declaration, demonstration and celebration of commitment in the presence of all the people who love them and mean something to them.

And that's universal. It's how marriage happens in all cultures. The 'official' bit is just paperwork.

OK, OP has been perceiving it. Apologies for drafting not meeting MN standards

@AuntieStella

OK, OP has been perceiving it. Apologies for drafting not meeting MN standards

If you should apologise for something, it's for not reading OP's posts nor applying any critical thinking to them. She's said that she's responding to stuff she's read in the Mail. The Mail engineers coverage like this to provoke this exact response. It approaches people and asks questions to get comments like this and edits for the most explosive ones.

It's an anti woman hate rag that makes its money from pitting women against each other. OP, and everyone else who's got on a spite fest against disappointed brides as a result, has fallen right into it. Meanwhile, it gets on with ignoring or downplaying the stuff it doesn't want you frothing about.

And people say that media studies is a pointless subject.

I get told off for imprecision all the time!

My critical thinking is fine thank you. In the opening post, OP referenced sources other than the Daily Mail. Yes, I suppose people might lie during a press conference, but I don't work in the assumption they are.

There is also coverage in many MSM outlets including BBC

@AuntieStella

I get told off for imprecision all the time!

My critical thinking is fine thank you. In the opening post, OP referenced sources other than the Daily Mail. Yes, I suppose people might lie during a press conference, but I don't work in the assumption they are.

There is also coverage in many MSM outlets including BBC

Well if lots of other people think you are imprecise, maybe you don't need critical thinking skills to draw the obvious conclusion.

Yes, weddings are in the media a lot because of the extension of restrictions. It's affecting people. And every outlet is editing its story for its audience.

The determination to make this an attack on upset brides, or at least to defend those who want to make it an attack on upset brides, is a separate issue that really deserves its own analysis. As are all the endless sneering posts that conflate pandemic-related disappointment and stress with wedding insincerity.

@Workyticket

Really? You can't understand why someone might feel sad?

The restrictions are shite - no dancing, no drinks reception, 6 at a table, masks on unless seated.

Nowt to do with insta and all to do with not being allowed the fun bits of a celebration

No I can't understand it. Getting married is not about the party. These couples need to get a grip and be grateful that they are alive to get married. Lots of people have died from Covid over the past year.