No mask so school bus left my DD

[onanislandfaraway]

Both me and my DP was at work today so my 13yo DD has to be home alone for a couple of hours until DP gets home at 6pm. I texted her asking did she get home OK and she told me she'd lost her mask during a sports session at school and that the school bus wouldn't let her on so left her at school.

She didn't want to hassle me or DP at work so rang her nan to pick her up and thank god she was able to and only lives a 15 minute drive away so wasn't waiting around too long. Her school is in the next town over to where we live so way too far for her to walk home. AIBU to think that the school bus is responsible for getting children home and should not have just left her at the school? Shouldn't they have spare masks just incase of instances like this? I will of course be making sure she has plenty of spare masks in her bag, to be honest she did use to carry a few spares but didn't happen to have any today. I am quite angry that they've done this.

Some of there comments astound me! All from perfect parents who make sure their children always have a mask and spares no less!! I'd be livid if this had happened to my dd and would be making a complaint about the jobs worth bus driver.

I wouldn't be happy about her being left behind.

But in future always ensure she has a spare mask in her bag just in case. My daughter had a set of reusable ones but also has a couple of disposables in her bag in case her or a friend forgets or loses theirs.

What if she had attempted to walk home and been abducted or run over?

Don’t be so bloody dramatic. By far the majority of 13 year olds get themselves home from school. Everyday. And given that it’s unlikely the bus runs to the OP’s front door, she’d have had some walking to do anyway.

Just leave it.
She's 13 and was obviously able to sort it - she had a phone FGS what is there to complain about?
I would see it as a good learning situation - your DD showed common sense, didn't collapse in a pool of tears because mummy is at work, she can't get on the bus, the nasty driver picked on her - or whatever you think the issue is.

Of course safeguarding is important, but it's not the bus company's job.

Safeguarding is most certainly the school transport bus companies job. It’s the job of every single person who works with children.

I don't understand the outrage at been left behind, abandoned etc. She was left at school, where she was safe and at 13 perfectly capable of asking for help, which she would have got if she needed it.

@lollipoprainbow

Some of there comments astound me! All from perfect parents who make sure their children always have a mask and spares no less!! I'd be livid if this had happened to my dd and would be making a complaint about the jobs worth bus driver.

So following the law makes you a jobs worth . Complain all you want but every parent is told the rules that must be followed if their child wants to use the provided transport . Driver done nothing wrong . If the OP isn’t happy with the rules she shouldn’t have signed up for it and instead can pick and drop off her DD each day .

@MrsBungle

Of course safeguarding is important, but it's not the bus company's job.

Safeguarding is most certainly the school transport bus companies job. It’s the job of every single person who works with children.

Yes but they left her at school where she was safeguarded. They probably even told her what to do.

She’s lucky her Nan could collect her really. Some children would be completely stranded without the school bus, their parents may not drive or own a car so they’d be forced to walk miles home.

In future make sure she has a few spares with her just incase. The school should have boxes available for people who lose them.

I wouldn’t mention it to the school, I’d just make sure she has spare masks with her in future.

The driver was right, leaving one child safe at school vs putting a bus full at risk because he let the rules go. He has no way of knowing who may have the virus.

If he had an outbreak traced back to him he would have been in big trouble. At 13 it's your DD's responsibility to have a mask, she should have asked the school office or friends for a spare before approaching the bus. How far is it anyway. It's midsummer so dark evenings aren't an issue

@lollipoprainbow

Some of there comments astound me! All from perfect parents who make sure their children always have a mask and spares no less!! I'd be livid if this had happened to my dd and would be making a complaint about the jobs worth bus driver.

Making sure your child has a spare mask isn't being a "perfect parent" it's about being a PARENT.

It's not like masks in schools and on buses are a new thing? We've been doing this for ages now, it takes 5 seconds to put an extra mask in their bag in case they lose one!

The only people responsible for this situation are the OP and her DD. She's 13 not a young child. Masks have been round long enough. My DD's always have at least 4 on them at school.

You should be proud that your DD had the common sense to think for herself and sort out a way of getting home.

I don't think a complaint to anyone us justified - she's 13 and was left on the school premises not in the Bronx.

I remember my DS was made to get off the school bus once (along with all the other passengers) in the middle of town after they'd been picked up outside the school. Due to an accident the main (narrow) road through town was shut and someone diverted all the traffic down a very narrow street with parked cars down one side. The bus got wedged on a wall and was going nowhere - and neither was any of the other traffic. All students just had to use common sense and ring someone to collect them. They also had to walk across to the other side of town so that whoever was picking them up could get to them avoiding the road closures. My DS does have ASD and even he coped with this unexpected event. And so did your DD. She presumably would have gone back into school if her nan couldn't have collected her. I bet she won't forget her mask again! But my point being that all sorts of unexpected things can happen on school transport- especially those on public services which serve schools where it's not unusual for buses to not arrive at all! We need to teach our DCs resilience not go running to complain every time the slightest thing doesn't go to plan - she's 13 not 5!

@onanislandfaraway

We mean this kindly. She's 13, across the country most 13 year olds walk (up to 3 miles) or take public buses to school, they wait in car parks too. Unless your dd has special needs you need to start to tryst yet and give her responsibility to manage these situations (which she did fine).

It's not the schools or the bus companies fault, it's your DD's .

Mine are a bit older but from 10 they went to school a couple of miles away, dd1 took the bus (normal city one) and Dd2 got a lift off me because by then I worked nearby but walked home, took 35/40 mins. At 14 they changed schools to further away here, dd1 took the bus dd2 chose to cycle 4 miles. Kids can do these things, it's normal. The "having to walk a whole 10 minutes to a car park" statement was actually concerning because you didn't think your 13 year old was capable, doesn't she go out with friends, what about college ... they need to learn coping skills

All those people pointedly asking if she wore the same mask all day, do you seriously think that on top of everything else pupils are religiously changing their mask every four hours?

DS’s school (private so assume rules different about who is responsible for school transport) had a 3 strikes and you are out policy for non-wearing of masks on the school bus. We were all informed of this policy when it was brought in (a few weeks after masks for 11yo on buses became mandatory). This also covered pupils taking masks off once on the bus.

DS knew the rules. He usually wore reusable masks but had a few disposable ones in his bag just in case he forgot to pick up his clean masks for the day.

If he couldn’t get on the bus he would have had to rely on us to fetch him as the school is in the middle of nowhere and 20 miles away. But that was something we had to accept if he ever missed the bus for any reason.

Driver did his job properly. Your daughter was safe at school, she's 13 not 3, don't see a problem in the slightest. My teenage autistic daughter manages without the school transport when she wants to stay late for an activity at school, and we're 15 miles away from the school. Can always improvise and put an item of clothing over your mouth and nose as an emergency.

Take the responsibility for yourselves, improvise, or always carry spare masks, but don't make out it's someone else's fault or they're to blame in any way. Man was just doing his job. How dramatic. Thank God for Nan or something. Like I say, the girl's 13!!! Not 3

@Getawaywithit

What if she had attempted to walk home and been abducted or run over?

Don’t be so bloody dramatic. By far the majority of 13 year olds get themselves home from school. Everyday. And given that it’s unlikely the bus runs to the OP’s front door, she’d have had some walking to do anyway.

Not every 13 year old can safely walk home.

This bus driver failed to transport a young girl home. He didn't know if that young girl was autistic, or had a phone on her, or lived 5 miles away or would have to walk down a dual carriageway to get home.

He failed in his duty to her and her parents.

If this had been my son at 13 he would not have been able to manage the situation, because he is autistic and has communication difficulties. The bus driver cannot just assume that every child he refuses to transport is NT and can safely make alternative arrangements.

I would be very angry about this OP and I can only assume some of the parents on here have never come across a vulnerable child in their lives. It doesn't matter that your child isn't vulnerable. That's not how safeguarding works.

There was a thread on here the other day about a child not having a mask. Have all children suddenly forgotten after months of mask wearing.
My children used to take a mask and at least one spare one (they don't now as no mask wearing and walk to school) just incase.
The bus driver was in a really difficult position because if he'd let your daughter on the bus parents would be up in arms that the driver was putting their child at risk.
It might have been a good idea for him to have spare masks but it's not really his responsibility. Or maybe they'd all been used up.
I wouldn't complain because while I do see your point it's not really anyone's fault and what would you expect them to do
At least your daughter had the sense to phone her nan up.

@DOINGOURBIT 13 or 3 doesn't matter she shouldn't have been left ffs!

@DirectionsForUse just correcting the inaccurate statement that safeguarding is not the bus companies responsibility. It is.

I’ve been a DSL for many years and this would be an issue in any of my schools. If a student isn’t allowed on the bus, for whatever reason, a teacher would be called over. We always have teachers in the bus park supervising.

[quote MrsBungle]@DirectionsForUse just correcting the inaccurate statement that safeguarding is not the bus companies responsibility. It is.

I’ve been a DSL for many years and this would be an issue in any of my schools. If a student isn’t allowed on the bus, for whatever reason, a teacher would be called over. We always have teachers in the bus park supervising.[/quote]
In high school really ? Not my experience of any of the schools I’ve worked at .

@cricketmum84 yes of course it's about being a parent but some of the downright patronising comments on here astound me ! Like no one has ever forgotten to give their child a spare mask before! We all make mistakes but this is Mumsnet where you aren't allowed to !!!!!

It's not winter or dark, she's 13 not 11 and the school isn't in Beirut is it? Just give her a handful of masks to keep in her bag and learn the valuable lesson.