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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

No mask so school bus left my DD

492 replies

onanislandfaraway · 14/06/2021 22:34

Both me and my DP was at work today so my 13yo DD has to be home alone for a couple of hours until DP gets home at 6pm. I texted her asking did she get home OK and she told me she'd lost her mask during a sports session at school and that the school bus wouldn't let her on so left her at school.

She didn't want to hassle me or DP at work so rang her nan to pick her up and thank god she was able to and only lives a 15 minute drive away so wasn't waiting around too long. Her school is in the next town over to where we live so way too far for her to walk home. AIBU to think that the school bus is responsible for getting children home and should not have just left her at the school? Shouldn't they have spare masks just incase of instances like this? I will of course be making sure she has plenty of spare masks in her bag, to be honest she did use to carry a few spares but didn't happen to have any today. I am quite angry that they've done this.

OP posts:
Leedsfan247 · 16/06/2021 18:57

Shouldn’t you be a responsible parent and pack DC a spare?
Why is everything down to the school? You need to take responsibility as a parent

ineedaholidaynow · 16/06/2021 19:00

@SpangleSparkle she was left at school not on the pavement. The school would not have been shut

Wandamakesporridge · 16/06/2021 19:00

I work in a school and we regularly get children coming back in because parent has forgotten to collect them / they forgot their bus pass / they forgot their keys etc. The school staff contact a parent or another adult on the list to ensure the child can get home. School offices are open for at least an hour after school if not more, so the sensible thing would have been for your DD to go back into school and explain the situation. Sounds like you need to have a chat to her about back-up plans. However sounds like she coped very well on her own.

As for ‘they should keep some spare masks on the bus’ …. judging by the amount of pupils we get in school regularly forgetting their masks, the box of spares wouldn’t last long!

CakeIsMyFavouriteAndBest · 16/06/2021 19:03

My daughters secondary school made it clear to us that if they are using public transport they need 2 masks. One to wear at school and another to wear on the bus/train. My daughter is currently getting a lift in but even so she knows to have a spare just in case she has to get the bus home.

Original poster
onanislandfaraway · 16/06/2021 19:09

I addressed why she didn't have spares in my post on page 13. I absolutely fucked up that day for her. I've never denied that. I don't even know what I'm arguing about anymore, this is ridiculously repetitive and boring. Can't we end it there?

OP posts:
TheWatersofMarch · 16/06/2021 19:10

So the normal safeguarding of children is out of the window because she didn't have a mask? Massively disproportionate reaction of the bus driver. Collective wearing of masks reduces risks somewhat but this does not mean there's a significant breach if someone doesn't.

ineedaholidaynow · 16/06/2021 19:13

If parents are adamant that buses should carry spare masks, maybe they could donate some

Whinge · 16/06/2021 19:17

onanislandfaraway

Did your DD explain why she didn't go back into school?

Ickythefirebobby · 16/06/2021 19:19

It was up to your daughter to have a mask and ensure she had a spare. I don’t blame the bus driver.

RandomUsernameHere · 16/06/2021 19:24

YANBU surely the school has a supply of disposable ones and could have given her one. I wouldn't make a fuss though if your DD doesn't want you to.

ilovesooty · 16/06/2021 19:38

@Angiemum24

That is disgusting. They should carry spares as kids lose things. I would sue the bus driver and the bus company.
That can't be serious...
Sockwomble · 16/06/2021 19:39

"I would sue the bus driver and the bus company."

Don't forget the compo face in local paper.

Kteeb1 · 16/06/2021 19:42

13 years olds are painful. Mine has to get herself to and from the school bus on hey own twice a week now and there often a drama. She kept forgetting her buspass and the driver would let her on. One day a few weeks ago he'd had enough and wouldn't let her on and left her in the school grounds. She called me but I was in a meeting and then had to ring my husband who was also in a meeting. He managed to get her old childminder to go and get her she had to spend the afternoon with little kids which she hated!. She hasn't done it since. I wouldn't be blaming everyone else and teaching her about responsibility. Sounds like she did take responsibility and you are undoing it. No harm came and she learnt a lesson. Move on.

venus22 · 16/06/2021 19:46

Why the hell didn't you provide spares?

Lunaticmess · 16/06/2021 20:05

We are in the middle of a pandemic. Why is it the school’s/ bus driver’s job to put everyone else at risk because your daughter was unprepared? If you’re so concerned about her inability to get home, it is absolutely your job to ensure she is prepared. Honestly, the entitlement some people have astounds me. Who do you think is paying for all the ‘spare’ masks? I’m sorry if this sounds harsh but, as a parent, this is entirely on you.

Rachand23 · 16/06/2021 20:12

You MUST report this. Totally irresponsible of the bus driver. Years ago a child didn’t have their bus fare and the driver put them off the bus and something happen to that child, since then bus drivers must just take child’s details and let them on the bus - same principle here! Masks are dirt cheap now so the bus company can afford to have a few spares, also YOU need to ensure your DD has spare masks too. Live and learn, don’t let it happen again.

DumplingsAndStew · 16/06/2021 20:23

@Whinge

onanislandfaraway

Did your DD explain why she didn't go back into school?

Or why she didn't ask the office for a mask before leaving for the bus?
Original poster
onanislandfaraway · 16/06/2021 20:24

@Lunaticmess
I'm well aware there's a Pandemic I've been working as an NHS nurse all through-out the god damn thing! You've obviously not read my other replies on this thread, I can't keep repeating myself and I don't really know why I keep bothering to reply anymore.

OP posts:
InTheDrunkTank · 16/06/2021 20:44

@TheWatersofMarch

So the normal safeguarding of children is out of the window because she didn't have a mask? Massively disproportionate reaction of the bus driver. Collective wearing of masks reduces risks somewhat but this does not mean there's a significant breach if someone doesn't.
Why not have a think about how stupid this sounds. This has nothing to do with safeguarding. Unless there are special needs involved (in which case she shouldn't be getting a bus unsupervised) even a not very bright 13 year old is more than capable of walking back to school to ask for help or ringing another adult for help (which is exactly what she did).

There is no safeguarding issue.

Lunaticmess · 16/06/2021 21:53

I have read them. As a nurse, all the more reason why you should understand the risk to everyone else on the bus. For what it’s worth, I think your daughter handled the situation perfectly well, so you’ve obviously done a great job. I’m not really sure why you’re so angry.

Original poster
onanislandfaraway · 16/06/2021 22:00

Lunaticmess, sorry if I came across as angry but I never said I thought she should be let on the bus without a mask. The last bit was more directed at all the other repetitive answers than your post. That is a lovely thing to hear about doing a great job, I appreciate you saying that.

OP posts:
Bizawit · 16/06/2021 22:03

This is despicable behaviour on the part of the bus driver and a serious safeguarding concern. All for the sake of a fucking mask. OP can you put in a complaint? I would be absolutely furious beyond measure.

Bizawit · 16/06/2021 22:05

@Lunaticmess

We are in the middle of a pandemic. Why is it the school’s/ bus driver’s job to put everyone else at risk because your daughter was unprepared? If you’re so concerned about her inability to get home, it is absolutely your job to ensure she is prepared. Honestly, the entitlement some people have astounds me. Who do you think is paying for all the ‘spare’ masks? I’m sorry if this sounds harsh but, as a parent, this is entirely on you.
Put everyone else at risk my arse. Ffs. The world has gone bloody bonkers.
Lilibet2022 · 16/06/2021 22:08

YNBU. DS forgot his mask last week and the school bus driver still let him on. I wouldn't be too happy either especially as she then had to make her way back from the next town if her nan couldn't do it.
I threw my last one away by mistake recently and a very kind lady in the car park gave me one of hers from a box they keep in the boot.

SofiaMichelle · 16/06/2021 22:23

YABU.

Your mistake. Your DD's mistake. Not the driver's fault.

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