To consider fundraising/ go fund me / crowdfunding for weight loss surgery

[lotstolose1]

I imagine this will be a very controversial one and I am opening myself to opinions I potentially won't want to hear. All I ask is please don't be nasty and insulting (I can take harsh & honest)

I am fat, majorly fat, even considered super obese. I've tried everything under the sun, I always manage between a few pounds to a few stone and then fail or stall and put it back on plus more. BMI in the high 50's, almost 23 stone at 5ft 2. I am only in my early 20s.

My GP recently agreed that Bariatric surgery would most likely be the best way forward and agreed to put me forward on the NHS. This could take years, maybe 5.

I have looked into options privately and I just can't afford it. My credit is shot to bits. I've considered selling my car but then I'll just leave myself in a worse position as I'll still have the finance to pay off and then no car to get me about.

I have a few household things I could sell, to get maybe about £500 myself. I'm on very low income and no savings.

AIBU to maybe start a go fund me/ fundraising to raise the rest of the money I'd need. I'd need to raise maybe about £4K.

I am deeply unhappy and the thought of even posting pictures of myself and my weight online for a fundraiser terrifies me and not something I'd do lightly....I'm worried I'm running out of time, I'd like another child but don't want to grow through it while being this massive.

The thing is people give all sorts of money for a wide variety of things, even when they don't know the person.

A young friend of mine tried to beat the waiting list for top surgery by posting a crowdfunder. He was asking for 1500 to top up his savings, within 2 hours the money had topped 2.5k and over two thirds of it was from people he didn't know. One random person gave over £300.

So it's definitely worth a try. Good luck.

There a private clinic in Turkey that does it

Lots of people on TikTok have had it done, alot cheaper than here,

Its not a recommendation though, as i know nothing about it

But maybe check it out

I don’t think you’re unreasonable to be honest but as you’ve said my worry would be people being nasty.

@LaurieFairyCake I popped it on the thread that it would need to be done abroad, I couldn't definitely afford it here. In my main post I said about my credit, no chance of a loan/credit card/ financing x

In March this year I weighed 21st 5lbs and was offered to be referred for weight lose surgery. To me it really was a wake up call. I thought if after the surgery I won’t be able to eat much do I really need to wait till I’ve had the surgery to adjust my eating? I’ve reduced the amount I eat and been put on Orilstat. I keep each meal below 15g of fat and I’ve had very few side effects. If I want chocolate I have it but not the whole bar just 15g of fat worth. I think about what I eat and try to go for the healthier option. I’m unable to exercise due to a severe knee injury and can only walk very short distances. Ive lost over 2st. I’m not on a diet I’ve just been consciously eating. Some weeks I’ve lost nothing and in the past I would give up and think it’s not working but this time I’ve just keep going. Ive got no time scale I’m just chipping away at it. You can still do something if you want whilst you wait for the surgery. Good luck with it all x

I've been referred to an NHS health coaching service, and they have been emphasising the importance of sleep. When you sleep badly, your body not only craves more sugar, but it stops processing the fat in your body and starts processing lean muscle instead. (which is an absolute twat of a system if you ask me)

But you can, in theory, eat a diet that would be OK with good sleep but not enough with bad sleep.

There's lots more - maybe see if you can get a referral? I'm finding it helpful for lots of areas of my life.

@Cravendale

There a private clinic in Turkey that does it

Lots of people on TikTok have had it done, alot cheaper than here,

Its not a recommendation though, as i know nothing about it

But maybe check it out

That's what I'm aiming for to skip the NHS wait, that's why only 4K, here it would be over 10k

Can you get a second job? Or change jobs?

As Lavender mentioned above, once accepted on the NHS pathway, you would have around a year with sessions with a dietician, physiotherapist, psychiatrist etc so well worth getting on board even if it takes some time.

Good luck!

With your swimming, you might want to try interval style training. Two laps fast, two more steady etc. Mix it up as if you easily swim a good distance you're probably not working hard enough to burn significant calories

If you want to raise the money yourself I'd look at matched betting. You can start with as little as £20 and make a couple of thousand relatively easily. If your partner is amenable you can then do all the sites on their behalf too.
Have a look at Team Profit for a complete handhold through it. There's no risk if you follow the guides.

I'm travelling to Turkey to get my bariatric surgery. £3k.

Its taken me 18 months to save and am now delayed because of covid but I can't wait.

OP you say your GP has agreed to put you forward for NHS bariatric surgery - have you had your first appointment on the pathway yet?

Even if you want to go private, it is worth proceeding with your referral from your GP and getting on the NHS pathway. You might find it helpful to discuss your concerns about the waiting list with the NHS consultant or dietitian, and they can advise you.

The problem with a cheapy operation abroad, apart from no aftercare, is that the NHS just ends up fixing these operations when they (inevitably) develop complications when you’re back in the UK. So it costs the NHS money anyway, and is more dangerous for you.

Could you wait the 5 years and try to cut back in the meantime?

@SandrasAnnoyingFriend

If you want to raise the money yourself I'd look at matched betting. You can start with as little as £20 and make a couple of thousand relatively easily. If your partner is amenable you can then do all the sites on their behalf too. Have a look at Team Profit for a complete handhold through it. There's no risk if you follow the guides.

Thanks for the idea but definitely a no go for me. Both me and the partner have had a gambling problem, now stopped thankfully and use Gamstop which doesn't even allow us too go on betting sites, I worry anything like that would spiral me.

That's where all the money problems have come from / why my credit is shot to bits and now why I'm working to pay the debts and have very little spare money

@BoeJidensLeftShoe

I'm travelling to Turkey to get my bariatric surgery. £3k.

Its taken me 18 months to save and am now delayed because of covid but I can't wait.

I hope it all goes well, good luck

I agree with the advice to get on the pathway now.

Best case scenario - you find another solution, you discharge yourself from the pathway and someone else moves up a place in the queue -- no harm done.

But, in the worst case scenario, if you don't find another solution, you will kick yourself 2-3 years down the line, thinking you could have been having your surgery by that time.

Tbh this is classic avoidance. I see it with drug and alcohol users, using away while talking about some mythical time in the future when theyd get to rehab and someone else would sort them out.

You're fixating on crowd funding and whether to go overseas etc, but how much have you eaten in the meantime? Its YOU that needs to change.

I've sent you a PM

Please, please don’t get it done abroad. This is how you can “fail” at bariatric surgery, or even die. Really.

You can have the surgery, lose a bit after, and then still either stay overweight, or gain it all back, or gain even more. The NHS method requires you to lose some weight first to show that you can, and that you understand healthy eating. It also requires psychotherapy to get to the roots of why you gain weight (so many overweight women eat in an emotional state or started overeating after a trauma or have bad habits from childhood even). You have to tackle weight loss from EVERY angle for the surgery to really work to maximum effect. And the NHS will support you after the surgery, to make sure you’re losing weight and on the right track.

Not only that, but abroad, they will often use anesthetic without extra safety precautions for large patients, and people have died. The NHS does all kinds of tests to make sure you’ll SURVIVE your surgery first, and if they feel there’s any danger, they won’t perform it, because they’re not after your money.

@Arbadacarba

I agree with the advice to get on the pathway now.

Best case scenario - you find another solution, you discharge yourself from the pathway and someone else moves up a place in the queue -- no harm done.

But, in the worst case scenario, if you don't find another solution, you will kick yourself 2-3 years down the line, thinking you could have been having your surgery by that time.

I will definitely ensure I get on the pathway/stay on the list. Maybe the wait may not be as long as I think. I need to get a more positive mindset

Hi @lotstolose1 I can empathise, at my highest my BMI was around 46 a few years ago, like you I tried diet after diet and would end up giving up. There is a need for the right mindset and this time I seem to be at the right place to really do something about it. I've been calorie counting using MFP since last year and now have a BMI of 28.

Honestly unless you have the friends and family around you to cover the costs I think it's unlikely you would get enough donations to cover the surgery costs.

If you work do you have any kind of workplace health cover? I'm signed up to Vitality health insurance so pay a nominal amount each year for private health cover and if you have a BMI over 45 (I think) then weight loss surgery is covered on the plan so you just pay 25% of the overall cost and they pay the rest. It's worth looking into even if you are able to sign up and have to wait a year to be covered it would be a shorter time period than the NHS wait.

@BoeJidensLeftShoe

I've sent you a PM

I've no idea how to access PM's haha I'm new here I'm using the app, should they show up somewhere on here?

Just to add the place I'm going does significantly MORE preop tests than privately UK. Including endoscopy, heart tests, scans, that UK Dr's do t bother to do