Neighbours hate us because of extension.

[SummerHathCommeth]

We’ve lived in our house for 5 years. We have two sets of neighbours on one side who we get on very with well. The ones on the other side not so much. They moved to their house 6 years ago are recently retired with DC who have left home. We have 4 children and need to extend as desperately more space.

We spoke to them telling them our plans before we applied for permission and were surprised when they put in a very long objection stating it would affect light to one of their side windows at certain times of the day in winter and that we could see into their property from our skylights.

We got permission and have begun building but the tension is palpable, it’s sucked all the joy out of it. They have stopped speaking to us and are actually quite hostile shaking their heads every time they see us and the woman confronted DH telling him how underhand we’ve been. They have never been particularly friendly to us or any of the other families but this is making life very stressful.

Their (extended) house is 15 meters away from ours with two gardens, two hedges and a road in between and also at a much lower elevation. Our skylights will be 9 foot above floor level so we couldn’t see out of them even if we wanted to.

Are we being unreasonable?

Can they see in to your house OP? Maybe from upstairs, and they think you'll be able to see them (I very much doubt it if their house is lower!)

There is probably nothing you can do to convince them otherwise, so I'd keep away from them as much as possible.

They’re hypocrites, ignore the cunts.

You spoke to them before hand, you got permission granted, they objected and got rejected, let them crack on.
Try and enjoy the excitement.

Ignore them but if you have builders who blast their music all day above the noise of their power tools, they're going to hate you and I would, too. A friend is having to deal with this just now and it's got to legal level.

It's horrible watching neighbours "permitted development" extension rise above our garden blocking out the light. The noise and dirt - especially in the summer is horrendous. These are smaller houses and gardens so the impact on neighbours is massive The law allows them to do it so we haven't complained.
But I hate it and have no desire to speak to them any more. I'm polite and say hello but that's it. Maybe once it's finished and the noise and dirt is finished and we can admire the tall brick wall that hides the sight of the sunset it will feel better.

You are allowed to build an extension . Equally, they are allowed to be pissed off about it. That’s life.

They sound like a pair of NIMBYs who think they can have an extension but nobody else can.

They're batshit.

Why peer out of the skylights when you could just look out of the windows that are already there?

Ime sometimes it's better not having to be fake nice to ndn. They are Cunts. They act like Cunts.. Ignore the Cunts
So much Cunts my phone gave them a capital C!!

They are being unreasonable, not you. They clearly don’t give a shit about your feelings by being hostile. It’s been approved by the council so they’ve got a complete cheek.

Tell them to move along, nothing to see here, now fuckety fuck off!!

@MrsOvertonsWindow

It's horrible watching neighbours "permitted development" extension rise above our garden blocking out the light. The noise and dirt - especially in the summer is horrendous. These are smaller houses and gardens so the impact on neighbours is massive The law allows them to do it so we haven't complained. But I hate it and have no desire to speak to them any more. I'm polite and say hello but that's it. Maybe once it's finished and the noise and dirt is finished and we can admire the tall brick wall that hides the sight of the sunset it will feel better.

Yep, my kitchen window now looks out a solid brick wall. Most attractive, the sun is overrated anyway. My next door neighbour wasn’t even living in the place when the monstrosity was being thrown up so he missed all the lovely filth and noise.

Councils green light almost every extension these days, to hell with the effects on the neighbours’ property.

Talking to them beforehand might have been your downfall depending on how you phrased it.

If you said something like - "just so you know, we are planning to extend and have submitted to the council, planning number XXX, please file any objections you have with them, but providing they approve we fully intend to go ahead" - then you have done the right thing in giving them a heads up and making it clear that their opinion won't sway you.

However, if you were more vague they might have taken it that you were consulting them on it and getting their ok before proceeding. Then you went ahead anyway against their wishes despite them making it clear they didn't like it, they might be peeved their opinion was saught and then ignored when it didn't suit.

Of course, you are not being unreasonable to extend when you have relevant permission, but equally they don't have to like it, nor are they obligated to be friends/friendly with people they don't like and are causing them inconvenience.

No one likes living next to building works, it’s noisy and shit. You are causing the noise and inconvenience, but you’re allowed and it’s finite. (and I really don’t mean you’re doing anything wrong to them, you aren’t).

I bet in a year or so when it’s all done and the extension hasn’t ruined their life they’ll cheer up a bit. Just stay polite until then.

Ignore them. We had similar with our neighbours in our old house. They'd had an extension and loft conversion but hated the idea of us having one. I think it was partly jealousy - they resented the fact we were younger and had the funds to extend the house.

Our neighbours had (foolishly) put windows on their extension that was up against our boundary and were annoyed that they would be able to see our brick extension. Unfortunately for them I called the planners to discuss this which unearthed the fact that they didn't have planning permission for their extension in the first place! And they'd threatened to call the council on us! We had planning and building regs sorted.

The woman also asked the builder if he could change the design of the flat roof as she felt it would mean more rainwater onto her roof and guttering. It wouldn't and DH produced the drawing to calculate it (he's an engineer and designed the loft) but apparently she was still the expert as being a legal Secretary qualifies you in everything

We eventually moved and I do hope the new owners don't have the same issues as we did!!

Where I live, there are some apartments that have always enjoyed a lovely sea view. 2 years ago a builder built more apartments directly in front of them on an old Pier. Original apartments lost their view and the sun on their balconies. Now that's unreasonable.

You're doing something that will make you life better and theirs worse. If only because of the building work.

Of course they're pissed off.

They’re being knobs. They’ll tire of it eventually! Just ignore them until they do.

Just ignore them. Either they'll get over it or they won't but just imagine how miserable their house is talking about the extension all the time. Enjoy your house and ignore them

But @MrsTerryPratchett they have an extension themselves - it's very petty to object to the OP having the same.

@AnneElliott; Did they have to take their extension down?

We lived in a house for over 20 years, and during that time put up with our neighbours on either side having extensions built, with never a word of complaint. One of them took a year, the other 18 months. I then became disabled, and we NEEDED to have an extension built so that I could sleep downstairs. They both objected to the Council! Their objections were overruled, so we went ahead and had the building work done. We were incredibly lucky with the weather and the whole job was done in 6 weeks! The neighbours continued to watch closely as the extension went up, and then went running to the council, claiming that the new chimney was ONE brick wider than it should have been! The building work ground to a halt for a couple of days while the Council sent someone out. They took one look, and decided the neighbours were being ridiculous, so the work continued. One set of neighbours never spoke to us again, and the others made snide comments every time they saw us, and even refused to take in a parcel for us one day - I know, because I saw them turn the delivery man away - he only went there because due to my disability I was too slow getting to the door! Having been good friends for all the years we lived there, and always helped each other by taking in parcels etc, to then be ignored or shunned, because we had an extension built which we actually needed, rather than just wanted, really hurt, and ultimately caused us to move away from the area, to a house where our nearest neighbours are half a mile away. It really isn't that easy to ignore neighbours who make life unpleasant, but we had the last laugh, because where we live now, is a hundred times nicer!

You're unreasonable to expect them to be happy about your extension. I also can't see how having someone shake their had at you occasionally is sooo stressful and sucking out all the joy. What joy is there in having building works done on your house anyway?

They used to live in your house and know you'll discover the bodies when you start digging the foundations

@HollowTalk

But *@MrsTerryPratchett* they have an extension themselves - it's very petty to object to the OP having the same.

Oh they can be hypocritical arses and pissed off at the same time

True!