Any SAHMs / SAHWs out there with husband’s who have decided they are now “working from home?”

[samaya]

Hi, just wondering if anyone else is in this position and how it is it all panning out for you if so?

Personally, I am finding it quite hard work if the truth be known.

I don't understand why people can't relax still and watch something in the day, why do you have to be "on"?
It's like those threads where people love it when their DPs go away because they can eat cereal for tea and watch rubbish on tele. Why can't they do it anyway? I can do anything around DP and that's how it should be.. completely relaxed in your own home.

@Lemmeout

I would hate it. If my dh declared he was working from home I’d change jobs, not to be unkind but it would drive me up the wall. He’s great and all that but I do not want to live and breathe the same person every day,

@Lemmeout let's hope you're divorced before retirement then!

Why didn't you just wait or not clean?

“dobby the house elf “

@CookPassBabtridge yes! I didn't even know this was a thing. I don't get it.

I have always worked from home, so it’s not a new thing for me. Having DH here as well is a complete pita and I can’t wait for him to go back to the office. I need my space professionally and mentally.

My dh is permanently WFH now and it works well for us as he’s on tap for dog sitting if I want to go out all day or away . I must say that him being here has very little affect on my lifestyle , I basically carry on like I always have so if that involves spending all day watching cricket in the TV then that still happens . The only real change is that I make more hot drinks and provide a light lunch if I’m in .

“Whaaaaaaaaaaat?? Can't you just hoover after he's finished work, or on the weekend!?”

Not really, because the evenings are busy with dinner and the kids and homework (although not this week obvs) and also he’s usually on the phone of computer in the evening anyway. It’s always been like this.

How long does the hoovering take?!

I actually quite like it and I will miss him when he goes back to the office, although I think he will only be going in for one or two days a week. It’s better as he had quite a long commute and we ate after our youngest went to bed. Now we all eat together and have the rest of the evening free.

Get him to a garden office. And get a nespresso machine
And consider if this is the life you actually want.

I don’t even know why he would turn you into a PA. or make you get coffee. Or make you feel uncomfortable. Or why you’re busy on your feet till 11pm or why you can’t hoover.

This I think is WAY BIGGER than the original post

@LaLaLandIsNoFun - I appreciate your point that there is literally no spare room in your bedroom for a desk, but what about one of these? They're designed to go under the bed, so your DH could sit with his back up against the bedhead, and this over his knees.
www.amazon.com/Vaunn-Medical-Adjustable-Overbed-Hospital/dp/B00QMNTMXA?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

I also could not tolerate what you are putting up with. I find it hard enough when DH is here endlessly, going out to fewer external appointments, even though we're in Australia and our lockdowns are shorter and more infrequent, the Big One last year was appalling, with us all at home, trying to home school and him being in his office but coming through to get lunch/coffee/snack/whatever while I'm trying to corral the then-7yo into doing what he was supposed to.
Fecking nightmare!

If I hoovered them full house properly it takes about 2 hours. Mainly because of pets. I have to do it every other day.,I used to have a cleaner, but I’m not sure if she’s coming back.

What IS it with the cycling? Baffling!

The stairs though?

“The stairs though?”

Sorry, what do you mean?

I don’t even know why he would turn you into a PA. or make you get coffee. Or make you feel uncomfortable. Or why you’re busy on your feet till 11pm or why you can’t hoover.

This I think is WAY BIGGER than the original post

True dat!

My DH works shifts and was never WFH but when I was WFH (school hours) sometimes I had to whisper so as not to wake him up - light sleeper plus new build house with paper thin walls and floor.
I couldn't always be quiet as was teaching!

I don'tind the working from home part, thankfully he is in the front room and we have the rest of the house. I work mornings only and used to do all the school runs but now atleast he can do the longer college drop off.
I just can't stand the miriad of mugs left on the worktop every hour, if I'm having a coffee a couple of times in the morning I just reuse the same mug but he uses a different one every time and never ever leaves it in the sink or dishwasher.
He does a bit of showoff parenting as well especially when he's mid call and the youngest starts crying about something. He's never been so attentive to their needs before and never is after his working hours.

Lala - what are the civil service saying about them returning to the office? Any dates on the horizon at least?

You said you had to clean 3 flights of stairs and two landing carpets on my hands and knees with a damp sponge so I assume that hoovering the stairs & landing wouldn't take 2 hours. If it does how long does cleaning by hand take?

It just seems a bit odd that if you can't hoover at some point during the day/evening because DH won't give you time you need to get on your hands & knees 🤷🏻‍♀️

DH has a coffee image for WhatsApp I feel your pain!

I'm reluctantly not working currently and as DH likes this he doesn't push coffee etc too far.

I will be happy to have DH back in the office although there are also pluses in having him around.

DH works from home for over 9 years now. I work part-time.

It helps that his office is in the loft, he vanishes around 8am and resurfaces at 5-6pm. It is rare that I go up unless there is a reason. I do my. things on my day or days off. The office is a tiny room with space for a desk, shelves and a drawer where also the printer is based.

I may cook lunch for both of us if I am in during the morning but there are also days I don't and just make myself a sandwich and DH sorts. himself out. I may bring up a cup of tea if I am on the first floor with one for me.

@lakesummer

DH has a coffee image for WhatsApp I feel your pain!

I'm reluctantly not working currently and as DH likes this he doesn't push coffee etc too far.

I will be happy to have DH back in the office although there are also pluses in having him around.

He has a coffee image? As in if he wants one WhatsApp’s you an image?

I’d be pouring that coffee on his head.

gagrag - the issue I have here is that the cats claw the carpets and I have to pull out bits they have wrecked by hand, plus it takes a while to lift the pet hair. I used to get them shampooed, but obvs this is even noisier! Basically, I need new carpets after only two years of living here. Does anyone have recommendations for cat and dog proof carpets? Luckily, most of the house has wood floors, so that’s fine.