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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To tell you how I feel now I’ve lost 5 stone (some content that’s a bit rank so don’t open if squeamish or pregnant and nauseous etc)

122 replies

fat13 · 30/05/2021 20:09

This is SO indulgent. Sorry Blush

I still have another 3 to go so I’m still quite big. But as the weather has finally got warmer here’s some stuff that I’ve noticed:

I used to get a cheesey sort of thing under my belly. I had to shower twice every day without fail or this STANK. Now I still shower at least once a day but I choose to: I don’t have to because of this revolting thing.

I have so much more choice with clothes. Last summer I wore black leggings and baggy t shirts. Now I can wear bright summer colours and not feel self conscious.

My back isn’t as fat.

I don’t feel embarrassed to have my photo taken with my children. I definitely still look plump but I don’t avoid the camera and I ask DH to take photos of us.

I got a job, after thinking no one would employ me.

I don’t look scruffy any more. I’m not saying all big people do. I know some look very elegant; but I never did.

I’m losing motivation so add yours!

OP posts:
wheresmymojo · 31/05/2021 11:44

Perhaps this is why I find it hard to get motivated to lose weight.

I'm a size 22 but don't have any kind of weird aromas or 'stomach cheese', can walk around all day with no problems, my feet and joints don't hurt, etc. I wear pretty nice clothing and don't feel I need to wear baggy black clothes. Normal periods, normal blood sugar, blood pressure a bit on the low side if anything.

I don't seem to have these things - am I just lucky?

This isn't any kind of weird stealth brag (who would brag about being really fat?) I just find it hard to identify with these kind of posts and wonder about it...

YellowMonday · 31/05/2021 11:57

Regarding loose skin, I'm going in with the expectation it will happen and it will be noticeable. Thinking worst case to manage my body expectations!

Once you reach goal weight, you need to maintain for 12 months to see how your body recovers. Then you can explore skin removal surgery (I've opened a seperate savings account for this - money I previously spend on food is going in here weekly). You simply don't know how your skin will bounce back until the weight is gone and you maintain it.

Measures I'm taking to support my skin while I'm losing weight includes 3 litres of water a day, lifting heavy weights at the gym to build muscle to replace the fat, body brush 3 times a week, slather myself in moisturiser.

These measures will not prevent loose skin, but instead give my skin as much hydration and love as I can to help with its recovery. I used to be terrified of loose skin to the point of not losing weight. However, now I'm like it is what it is - I would rather have loose skin which I can remove with surgery than carry this weight any longer.

YellowMonday · 31/05/2021 12:02

@wheresmymojo could you use visceral fat as a motivation? I find this image very motivation when you see a normal weight vs obese weight female MRI.

Like you, I don't have any real heath impacts like blood sugar, blood pressure, etc, but being obese is literally putting your entire body under strain daily and putting yourself at high risk for many diseases.

To tell you how I feel now I’ve lost 5 stone (some content that’s a bit rank so don’t open if squeamish or pregnant and nauseous etc)
MattDamon · 31/05/2021 12:09

Well done, OP, and everyone else.

Re: loose skin worries... Rebel Wilson was overweight from childhood and since losing the bulk of her weight she has visible loose skin (legs, arms). BUT she looks fabulous anyway and is clearly enjoying being able to wear trendy clothing, loose skin be damned.

I've lost 4 stone-ish and my arms are currently looking very 'flappy', but I'm still enjoying the hell out of wearing a summer-y strappy top today. Grin

73kittycat73 · 31/05/2021 12:10

Thank you YellowMonday , really appreciate the reply. Smile

73kittycat73 · 31/05/2021 12:12

Thanks MattDamon Smile I had been loosely following Rebel (Well, when she pops up on the news) and didn't know she had a lose skin problem too. Makes me feel better that someone with all that money and help can put up with a bit of lose skin, then so can I!

AnnieJ1985 · 31/05/2021 12:21

I look a bit like a slightly deflated balloon in places - not totally wrinkly/flappy, but if I move in certain ways my skin kind of puckers. My neck is the worst (but not that bad), so I am being conscious of moisturising it. The rest is my tum, thighs and boobs, so not going to be on show anyway, but I wear a lot of tight leggings or jeggings - they won't win me any prizes for style, but they hold it all in!

My arms look better thinner, even with a bit of wobble (they wobbled anyway, its just a different wobble now!)

ImprobablePuffin · 31/05/2021 12:33

Does anyone worry about going back to normal food when you have to regulate your intake yourself?
I did exante a few years ago and I lost a fair amount but the problem was my relationship with food so when I stopped exante I put all the weight back on.
Now I just watch my portions and eat healthily and that works for me.
I'm booked for a tummy tuck in 9 days (eek) to remove excess pregnancy skin and to repair my tummy muscles so that will spur me on I'm sure

dray9925 · 31/05/2021 12:45

Well done everyone!! Really needed to see this I have a wedding to go to in august that im hoping will be some extra motivation!
In total I would like to loose 5 stone but will
Be happy with going a down a dress size or two by august!
Lost 1/2 a stone so far xx

WhoWants2Know · 31/05/2021 12:49

I just tried on my summer clothes and got a huge motivation boost. Somehow the majority of my weight is in my arse, so shorts are a nightmare.

LordOfTheOnionRings · 31/05/2021 12:51

Well done.

But I'm sad to read a lot of you couldn't love yourself when you were larger.

SmudgeButt · 31/05/2021 13:13

is this an ad thread?

AnnieJ1985 · 31/05/2021 13:27

@SmudgeButt

is this an ad thread?
I am not doing meal replacement or attending a slimming group, so if it is an ad, I shouldn't be here 😂😳
fat13 · 31/05/2021 13:31

No not in the slightest - someone asked how I did it. In the first to say it’s not for everyone it’s just it worked for me iyswim. Same with SW etc. They work well for some people.

OP posts:
WhoWants2Know · 31/05/2021 13:45

I think when people who are on the same type of plan just get excited when they see each other in the wild.

But since starting mine, I've had ads pop up for at least half a dozen other replacement plans that are probably very similar. Since doctors started recommending the "Fast 800" type plans to reverse prediabetes, lots of them have sprung up.

EveningOverRooftops · 31/05/2021 13:49

@LordOfTheOnionRings

Well done.

But I'm sad to read a lot of you couldn't love yourself when you were larger.

Perfectly capable of loving our self’s despite our sizes but with the weight many of us were/are carrying it’s impossible to love a body that aches and screams and can’t do what you want it to do.

It doesn’t mean we hate ourselves we just got a point of wanting to go back to a healthier, more physically able version of our bodies.

I loved the lack of male attention when fat. It was fucking amazing to exist in a world where I wasn’t sexualised and my body did that for me. I love it for giving me that invisibility cloak but it was unhealthy and I shouldn’t have to stay fat to be respected.

Now I’m 3 stone lighter I love that I can wear different clothes, my feet are a size smaller, my arse doesn’t instantly swallow my knickers, that I can move through the world at a different level, that I can feel the difference and power with my movements and they feel deliberate, that I can twist my body up into a pretzel doing yoga and it’s done wonders for my ability to sustain activity like hiking and gardening and swimming.

I didn’t hate myself. I was just intensely frustrated at what I could and couldn’t do.

MissingInActon · 31/05/2021 16:51

I’d love to know how you are approaching low carbing. I did it ten years ago and lost 2 stones but somehow just can’t do it this time. I know it works for me. I had loads more energy very quickly.

@BreakingtheIce

I'm pretty slack tbh. I basically cut out the obvious stuff: bread, pasta, rice, potatoes, pastry, cereals, alcohol, cakes/puddings/biscuits/chocolate. I'm not huge pasta and rice eater anyway but I thought cutting out bread would kill me because I love it, but if I miss it at all it's for the convenience rather than the taste. I don't miss potatoes or chips at all, oddly. I do miss lasagne, because you can make a lasagne out of anything and it's a hearty dinner with a bit of salad, and I miss flans. I don't sweat it about things that technically contain sugars, like fruit or legumes, because you've got to eat something and those are pretty healthy things to include in your diet.

I have cooked things for breakfast most days: eggs, sausages, bacon, mushrooms, tomatoes, occasionally baked beans. I really like that and it carries me through to early/mid afternoon, when I have something light like a piece of cheese and an apple, or a spoonful of peanut butter and some berries, or half an avocado. For dinner, I always cook properly (I did anyway), but I skip the carby bits even if I'm making them for my kids. So I might have fish or chicken with salad and/or veg but I'll skip potatoes even if they're having them. I make more effort to make nice salads with a decent dressing. Or I'll have a bowl of curry but no rice. I don't get het up about small amounts of carbs, like breadcrumbs on chicken.

I found very, very quickly that the fewer carbs I ate, the less hungry I felt and the more energy I had, which was a revelation, stupid as it sounds.

If I get hungry between meals I have a cup of tea. I have a bad and longstanding chocolate habit, so I've given myself a ration of two squares of dark choc after dinner every day. Every so often I scoff a load at once, which is a bit of a problem. I tried not having chocolate in the house at all, but it meant I ended up driving out to the supermarket at all hours to get some in an emergency, which seemed worse somehow. I'm actually thinking of having hypnotherapy for the chocolate addiction, as we were bribed with chocolate as children and it has longstanding dopamine pay-offs for me that tbh are completely outside my control. Occasionally if I have a stressful day, I'll go completely off piste and have two double gin and tonics and a family bag of crisps, and at that point I think, well, I'm definitely not in keto now and let myself enjoy the break before going back to the plan the next day. I actually think that if you take a complete break from diets for a ringfenced time, it can avoid the plateau effect, but you do have to be able to go back to basics again afterwards, which not everyone can. I'm not a person who dieted a lot all through my life, so these are new insights to me, but probably totally obvious to everyone else, lol.

I'm not losing weight at the rate of some people here, but I reckon a stone every two months is fine, and is sustainable for me, especially as I do bollock all exercise. I will reach my target weight around spring of next year. In the meantime, my skin and hair look better, my joints ache less and my gut health is 1000% better. Once moving around is more comfortable, I want to start walking regularly, so that may speed things up too.

HTH. Happy to chat by PM. Smile

Tigerstripe20 · 31/05/2021 20:55

@wheresmymojo

Perhaps this is why I find it hard to get motivated to lose weight.

I'm a size 22 but don't have any kind of weird aromas or 'stomach cheese', can walk around all day with no problems, my feet and joints don't hurt, etc. I wear pretty nice clothing and don't feel I need to wear baggy black clothes. Normal periods, normal blood sugar, blood pressure a bit on the low side if anything.

I don't seem to have these things - am I just lucky?

This isn't any kind of weird stealth brag (who would brag about being really fat?) I just find it hard to identify with these kind of posts and wonder about it...

How old are you, if you don't mind me asking? I have always hovered between a size 16 then went right up to a 22, carried it well and was pretty active same with my joints etc and never had any 'aroma' Was very lucky with periods always regular etc

Then I started the menopause at 48, I am now 53 and boy does everything hurt, knees, back, shoulders ( I did used to have very physical job though)
Diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes and put on meds this year , without any symptoms
I am kicking myself now I didn't lose weight when I was younger as my joints have suffered and I spent too many years yo yo dieting and thinking I'll start Monday .
The sad thing is my GP surgery seem to be doing all they can to fill me up with dozens of different meds and it has been a battle to say that meds (for me )are not the magic pill, losing weight isn't either but it will help.

Somethingsnappy · 01/06/2021 12:09

To all of you who have lost the weight.. You are AMAZING and a total inspiration!

And to the posters on here saying you don't know where to start... If they can do it, so can you (and me)! I've been looking into the fast 800. The recipes look delicious. I like the sound of it.

chaosmaker · 05/06/2021 18:04

thebloodsugardiet.com/ Great community and I think it now links to the fast 800. It's so supportive and there are also a load of low carb recipes on diabetes.co.uk and a wealth of info too on low carbing for the diabetics on here.

WhoWants2Know · 07/06/2021 07:55

Today is the first time I've been able to look in the mirror and see a difference, not just in my shape, but the way I carry myself. I have quite a way to go, but it's good to feel like something is changing.

StuffinThePuffin · 08/06/2021 04:45

I am wearing a pair of size 14 jeans today. I haven't done that in almost 3 years :) that size 10 is finally starting to seem less like fantasy and more like reality.

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