DH and Laundry Accident

[TerribleCustomerCervix]

I feel very silly for being so upset about this.

DH pulls his weight round the house, but can be really careless and a bit of a Half a Job Bob at times.

I was emptying the dryer and found my favourite item of clothing in a crinkly ball amongst all the kids stuff.

A dusky pink pair of Lucy and Yak cord dungarees- I fucking love them. They make me feel cool and fashionable and I just feel great in them.

I tried them on once I’d managed to uncrinkle them and it was like trying to step into a condom. They’re out of stock so I can’t replace them.

I’m so (unreasonably?) upset at DH. He’s in a senior management position, smart and capable but somehow won’t or can’t follow washing instructions? He’s very apologetic but I’m fucking RAGING. I know it’s just “stuff” but it’s even the fact that the little 1950s housewife in the back of my brain is saying “Ah sure, at least he’s trying to help.”

RIP dungarees

I make laundry mistakes quite often. I assumed everyone did.

It’s just an accident, accidents happen I bet you’ve messed up washing before. I dyed my husbands bib shorts pink , I would be upset if he was ‘raging’ with me! I’d been nice enough to wash his clothes and accidents happen.

Are these them op? lucyandyak.com/products/the-organic-original-corduroy-dungarees-in-grape

It's so annoying and you are not alone

I sometimes put my washing in a separate bag if I'm concerned so it doesn't get washed by him

I think that's very annoying.

My DH doesn't "get" laundry. Not just mine, his own too. He shrinks jumpers etc. To me it's quite obvious if something is a bit delicate and I would usually check the label at least the first time washing something. I don't know why your DH couldn't just do that.

I disagree with your presumption that someone in a senior management position is necessarily smart and capable.

I understand how you feel, but it is usually because I am the one ruining the clothing in the laundry (I do all laundry, and in return never have to scrub a toilet ever again or handle any vomit incidents).

My family has wool this and that (even sneaky expensive sports socks), and linen blend whatsits and so many things that can’t be just put on a 40C wash and tossed in the tumble dryer. So I have two laundry baskets one for bog standard and one for special care where I do read labels and do my best not to ruin the items. I still occasionally ruin things though.

I think so long as the person is really trying and truly apologetic plus there is a system in place, it’s ok to be angry and upset but not to take it out in them because honest mistakes do occur. I’m doing 4 loads laundry a day and I once told my family (after I’d shrunk a very expensive fair isle jumper that was DCs absolute favourite) that my error rate is at least in the area of 1 in 2,000 so that means I am doing the laundry at a 99.95% success rate...which is pretty close to perfect.

I can sort of understand how this happened. We have a no special care items in the regular laundry hamper rule. Everything that requires any kind of special handling has to be placed in the “specials” hamper. It’s crazy to expect the person doing laundry to inspect each piece.

DH had the job of the dark wash.

He decided to help and followed logic by doing a green/blue/yellow wash. Only my dark green silk blouse was in it

I didn't expect him to know all the bizarre intricacies of silk/colours/delicates tbh. Anyhow we introduced the "delicates" basket aka "DH do not touch". It is mainly my work dresses and bras tbh.

Works for us and he now does all the rest of the laundry and is good at weeding out stuff that can't go in the tumble dryer and ace at checking the forecast for outdoor drying days etc.

I do all the laundry in our house.
One evening I was doing a darks wash and threw all the darks into the machine. I always wash darks at 40 degrees. I also don’t go through every item, if it’s dark, it’s going into the machine. If you don’t want it machine washed, don’t throw it into the laundry basket.
He threw a cashmere navy jumper into the laundry basket. Which went into the wash.

He’s never let me live down “boiling” his jumper.

I am actually not quite sure who is being unreasonable. Me for washing (not boiling) but ruining his jumper, or him for throwing it into the laundry basket in the first place.

@NewUser123456789

Good lord, who has enough spare time to waste reading the labels on every item of clothing before washing and drying it?

Shovel clothes into the washer until no more fit, arbitrary slosh of powder in the drawer, wash on 'mixed fabrics', shovel into dryer, push go. If something doesn't survive the process then it clearly wasn't strong enough to survive in the wild.

I don't even have the spare space for a separate tumble dryer. So washer dryer it is. The drying process starts right after the wash. If it's in , it's in.

Accidents happen...I washed my OH match day Sunderland footy top on a too hot wash...now pink!

@TerribleCustomerCervix I’ve PMd you because I think I’ve found some on Vinted!

I have never in my life read a label in clothes and I tumble dry everything. Nothing has ever shrunk. I’m on your husbands side.

Like these?
www.ebay.co.uk/itm/265163596391?hash=item3dbcfb6267:g:ABUAAOSwvEFgooMs

I’d be upset with the situation but not with him unless this was more than a one off as we’ve all done stupid things.

In our house, if something has special washing and drying instructions it doesn’t get put in the laundry basket with everything else. On occasion my OH has bought pain in the arse deleicate jumpers I tell him to deal with them himself as I don’t want to be responsible for any shrinkage. I don’t have many clothes that need special care but I deal with them myself.

wash your stuff and let him do his own

I shrank a Gant wool jumper of dh’s last week, just bunged it in a coloured wash with a bunch of things and didn’t notice it. It happens to the best of us. Felt bad, but it was a mistake and he was fine about it.

I think you’re being a bit hard on your DH. If being a bit slap dash with the housework is his biggest fault then I don’t think you have much to moan about really.

@Merchymor

This is why we only wash our own stuff in our house!

It puts my teeth on edge when he washes his light shirts in with darker ones but I stay out of it.

I used to hide my washing from my mother when I was home from uni (she used to hunt for it in my room) because she shrank my favourite jumper and a couple of hand wash only tops!

Same here. Apparently MN cant cope with adults doing their own laundry but its absolutely the best thing I've ever done. I do mine , DH and DS do theirs. Zero drama , it doesnt mean extra loads as we only put a full load on and no sorting. Bliss

AHH MN
If a DH complained that Dw ruined some thing of his you would here there screams in space of "Do your own washing "

He made a mistake he apologised

Depop also has some listings. These ones are pink www.depop.com/products/bryonyanne24-amazing-pink-lucy-yak/

Oh no! So sorry about your dungas. This is exactly why I never let DP put the washing on - it’s just not worth the risk.

Oh crap, they're sold. There are a lot more listed though. www.depop.com/products/rannon-bubblegum-pink-lucy-and-yak/

I’m sorry OP! Can’t offer any new practical advice but as other people have said Lucy & Yak often come up on eBay/Facebook/Depop. Hopefully you find some in the right colour.

But @NewUser123456789 I laughed out loud when I read your post, that is 100% my take on laundry as well!

If something doesn't survive the process then it clearly wasn't strong enough to survive in the wild.