Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not talk to MiL until after I give birth?

151 replies

Lucidas · 23/05/2021 16:55

I’m due to give birth in two weeks. Have just come off a phonecall with a a sobbing MiL pleading for me not to give birth until the 15th June when they’ll have finished the renovations on their new home and have properly moved all their stuff in. Because apparently she doesn’t want to miss a single moment of the baby being here, but she also won’t be able to come and stay with us until she’s finished all the work in the house. So now it’s my job to ‘please please please hold on’.

Have mentioned that at my last scan, the baby was measuring very large (had to have a fasting blood glucose test to rule out diabetes), and that I don’t want to go over. Completely ignored.

OP posts:
mynameisbrian · 23/05/2021 17:10

What does she mean she wants to be able to spend lots of time with the baby. Can’t she help with your older DC? Did she boundaries shop with your first?

Redglitter · 23/05/2021 17:12

pleading for me not to give birth until the 15th June

As someone who has presumably given birth how exactly does she propose you stop the baby coming if you go into labour at a time that doesn't suit her 🤔

Shes absolutely batshit. She doesn't want to miss a single moment?? What is she planning on moving in and never leaving your side

EarringsandLipstick · 23/05/2021 17:12

Of course she is being ridiculous.

But all that's needed is an eye roll 🙄 a few nods of your head & move on.

You don't have to be dramatic either including the cutting contact bit (tho, sure, I wouldn't be actively encouraging it either). And this level of batshit behaviour from her doesn't need to cause you upset.

Sindragosan · 23/05/2021 17:12

Just cross your legs op Hmm

happytoday73 · 23/05/2021 17:15

I'd tell her not to mention it again as baby might hear & you know what babies are like.... Like to make an appearance at the most inconvenient time!

But you will message her every few days so she knows you are OK.... Then you can message Bright and breezy all OK message even if in labour ward!

Absolutely nuts to think you have any control on this

IgiveupallthenamesIwantedareg0 · 23/05/2021 17:16

I wouldn't even want to talk to her then! What a nut, and she doesn't want to miss a single moment of the baby being here and she also won't

be able to come and stay??????? BEWARE!!!!!!!

bigbaggyeyes · 23/05/2021 17:19

Can you put her off for the next 36 months... go and drill holes in a load bearing wall at her house every few weeks!

Loubiemoo · 23/05/2021 17:20

If you have it before then, just don’t tell her? Then present her with a 2 week old baby?

HermioneWeasley · 23/05/2021 17:22

She sounds bonkers and quite selfish.

BebesChamber · 23/05/2021 17:26

She sounds fully insane, unhinged. Deffo restrict contact for a while - for your own sanity in these last difficult weeks.

SadieCow · 23/05/2021 17:31

She's batshit!!

LoudestCat14 · 23/05/2021 17:32

She's bonkers. And emotionally manipulative, crying down the phone like that. Why on earth would you want her to come to stay afterwards?

1forAll74 · 23/05/2021 17:35

I would just treat it as a laughing matter,and think it must be a loopy MIL problem that she has.

Mix56 · 23/05/2021 17:36

"Hahaha", belly laugh ! is infact the obvious response !!!!

AnUnoriginalUsername · 23/05/2021 17:38

Yeah she's off her head. Just ignore her and focus on you and your baby

Timeforabiscuit · 23/05/2021 17:41

It's good when crazy is considerate enough to give you a heads up!

I would deploy your dh to be on mil watch, and then a news block until the 15th seems wise!

chocolatesweets · 23/05/2021 17:45

😂😂😂😂😂 what the? Nutcase.

Maybe she doesn't know how women give birth etc. Maybe she didn't have any sex ed lessons. That's all I can think of.

Completely overdramatic though and selfish. The equivalent of asking someone not to die on their birthday.

I would certainly limit contact.

partyatthepalace · 23/05/2021 17:46

Dear god... your poor thing. Get your DP to pull her up and then yes, divert all conversation to him.

Original poster
Lucidas · 23/05/2021 17:46

@bigbaggyeyes

Can you put her off for the next 36 months... go and drill holes in a load bearing wall at her house every few weeks!
Grin Grin

Have just ordered a box of raspberry leaf tea.

OP posts:
Theunamedcat · 23/05/2021 17:47

Ex mil wanted me to give birth 3 weeks after ds due date on her birthday ummmm no

FOJN · 23/05/2021 17:49

Have you invited her to stay or has she invited herself?

I'd have been tempted to laugh but the sobbing over something so ridiculous probably would have resulted in me being quite terse. Is a casual relationship with reality her normal behaviour?

Zzelda · 23/05/2021 17:51

Didn't you tell her to stop being bloody ridiculous, there is no way you can "hold on" at will? And that the baby will be born when it is best for the baby, not when it is best for her?

baileysisforme · 23/05/2021 17:53

I'd be actively trying to give birth before then (assuming safe for baby).

I'd want the baby here before she can be as she sounds suffocating.

2bazookas · 23/05/2021 17:53

Cut contact.
Tell DH, the alternative was getting your vagina stitched shut

Original poster
Lucidas · 23/05/2021 18:00

@FOJN

Have you invited her to stay or has she invited herself?

I'd have been tempted to laugh but the sobbing over something so ridiculous probably would have resulted in me being quite terse. Is a casual relationship with reality her normal behaviour?

She invited herself to stay for 'at least a week to 10 days', to help. And she does admittedly help, and has a good relationship with our toddler - it's just laced with melodramatics and various guilt trips. DH told her she can come for 2-3 days.

Yes yes it is.

OP posts: