This man was rude or am I being an idiot

[Queenie6655]

So walking out of shop today with my 3 year old DD a man was walking close behind us
It was a narrow walkway so we both sped up as he was indicating he wanted to get by
As he rushed past us my DD fell and everything in her hands fell onto the ground
She hurt her hand and knee
He stood watching
I had to drop everything in my hand to help her up
Everything was on the ground
He got in his car
Sat watching us
I rushed her to my car to get her comfy
Ran back to the pavement to gather up everything (shopping - fruit , veg, etc)
He sits in car still staring
So I stop and look over at him And threw my hands in the air
He prob thinks I'm bonkers
He's an idiot
Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Ugh 🤦🏼‍♀️

If there was room for him to get past why did you have to speed up .

To be fair, I think some men are very cautious of helping or speaking to unknown children these days, in case they get accused of being a weirdo/paedo. It happened a few years ago where I live; some poor bloke who was doing absolutely nothing wrong and had been trying to help a hurt child had his photo put on social media and was crucified for it. Some people also have disabilities; my brother wouldn’t speak to a child who had fallen over, not because he wouldn’t empathise with them, but because he’s very socially awkward and wouldn’t process what was the correct thing to do or say in that situation until later on.

Also, some people just don’t want to be helped. On one memorable occasion, I went to help an old lady who had dropped some things out of her purse and she told me to sod off . Once you’ve been on the receiving end of someone’s tongue in that situation you approach with more caution!

At the end of the day, you shouldn’t have rushed your daughter (if there really wasn’t room for him to get past you should have just taken the ‘we’ll take as long as we’ll take and people will have to wait’ attitude) and he didn’t have an obligation to help. Might have been nice if he did, but the fact that he didn’t doesn’t make him rude or a shite.

You need a bag

I have to admit, that was what came into my mind too

@GreyhoundG1rl

He shoved because he was hurrying to see one of his mistresses. I bet ya😁 Keep going, guys, we'll get a Mills and Boon blockbuster out if it yet 😂

It was a young one. He has few. He was also probably looking at his phone at pornhub so missed the child and that's why he full body slammed it

You shouldn't have rushed her. I'm confused as to why you tried to hurry her out of his way in case he got too close, then bemoan the fact that he didn't stay to help pick up your shopping

Oh FFS. Sometimes men people can walk TO CLOSE behind you and make you feel pressured and you panic a bit.
I can't BELIEVE anyone is excusing this twat "because social distancing".
No. He intimidated a woman with a small child and then sat and stared when the toddler fell over. He's a creep and YANBU OP.

Definitely his fault!
He was tailgating.
He is a man.

He doesn't sound all there. Difficult to know when to be tolerant and when to be angry. I'd go for tolerant otherwise I'd be angry all the time.

Wow I'm pretty surprised at the responses on this thread. I'm the first person to get wound up walking behind slow people but it's understandable if it's someone with a young child. I'd have said something like "excuse me could I squeeze past?" and I'd certainly have offered to help pick up your shopping, "covid times" or not. That's just basic human decency.

@Viviennemary

Why didnt you stand aside and let him go past. I cant stand being behind dawdling folk who've got all the time in the world.

Said it before and will doubtless say it again!

I'm so sorry if my disability inconveniences you.

I can see DS1 doing this when he's older. He tries to get into spaces that don't exist and doesn't always show the correct emotional response in situations, but he has Asperger's/ADHD. He'd feel awful but he'd struggle to know what he'd done wrong.

I hope your DD is okay OP

I agree he was a bit rude

But I also agree with PP's that you're probably more annoyed with yourself for not just letting him pass. That in itself is a bit rude really, not to just stand aside with your toddler if the walkway was that narrow.

@JellyTumble

Yeah. It’s definitely clear that you’re pissed off that it’s your fault because you rushed your daughter and she fell.

Next time don’t rush a wobbly toddler. He hasn’t done anything wrong, your anger is misplaced.

Nonsense - we were walking faster as he was right on our heels

Anyway thanks all

He was a dick

Covid
No covid
People need to have some respect and not be dicks
At the very least just wait - less than a minute and the wide walkway was all his
That's all he had to do

@regthetabbycat has the OP said she or her toddler are disabled?

So he was walking on the same path as you, clearly was in a rush and then when your daughter fell over and you were helping her up etc, he carried on about his day?
I'm not sure what you're expecting from him that would've made the situation better? Surely an 'aw' wouldn't fix your daughter's scratches?

Perhaps he isn't an intimidating creep, maybe he just doesn't like crying kids. (who does?)

Yep he was a dick IMO. If he wanted to get past, 'excuse me please' would Have have been the solution.

Walking up so close behind a Mum and small child on a narrow pavement ~~probably huffing/tutting~~ makes him a prick. Doubt he would have done that to a dad and kid

Why bother asking on here as you have obviously made your mind up that it was his fault.

Next time don’t walk faster move your daughter to the side and let people pass.

@regthetabbycat I'm with you. There are so many ignorant, ableist posters who assume people are paedos or dawdlers before thinking they may have additional needs/disabilities.

It all sounds a bit OTT

You rushed because he was behind you. He could have thought he had frightened you which is why he didn’t rush over to help but wanted to make sure you were ok.

I would have helped you but I’m a female so it would be easier for me I guess but I wouldn’t get mad at someone for not helping me. It all sounds a bit dramatic.

There's no reason why you should have had to let him pass, he should have accepted that he couldn't pass until out of the narrow passageway.

Regardless of whether he part caused dropping everything, he was a huge arse not to offer help.

I'd have said something like "excuse me could I squeeze past?" and I'd certainly have offered to help pick up your shopping, "covid times" or not. That's just basic human decency.
Exactly!! What world do we live in where an adult can't speak considerately to another adult? He can't have been in that much of a rush if he sat in his car after anyway!

Maybe he reads mumsnet and spend all that time deciding whether he will:

1 - have a post about him how he is surely up to something and a moron because he touched your stuff and now you all have to self isolate or something
Or
2 - how he is a moron because he did not touch your stuff

No matter what he would do, he would be in wrong.

At the very least just wait - less than a minute and the wide walkway was all his
That's all he had to do.

He didn't ask you to move, so he was waiting. Some people don't have any concept of personal space, maybe he was one of those.

Well this is precious in the extreme. 😂

probably huffing/tutting 😂😂

I like your poem, OP, but I don’t think the man really did anything wrong.