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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband booked a holiday,I don't want to do,aibu?

605 replies

breadbreadwine · 22/05/2021 10:44

My husband has booked a holiday for the half term.
I thought fab,just what we need...till he told me he has bought a 6 man tent and we are going away to Scotland for a week in a tent.
He's booked a parkdene tent holiday.
It was £155 for 4 of us and he has paid £700 for a tent.
He has bought sleeping bags,fridge etc
He said it's to save money.

Aibu here ?
A week in a tent in Scotland with 2 kids who don't sleep anyway.
I'm not high maintenance but I'm worried about the toilet /shower situation

I'm not happy

OP posts:
osbertthesyrianhamster · 22/05/2021 11:12

@Peridot1

You aren’t stuck with it. Lots of people are looking for camping stuff so he could probably sell it again easily.

I’d hate it too. I might do a nice caravan but no way would I do a tent.

And he can go on his own with the kids. Fuck him.
Love2cycle · 22/05/2021 11:15

I'll go in your place! I love camping, I'm dying for a holiday aswell!

goose1964 · 22/05/2021 11:16

I went camping a few times when I was younger, it was an adventure but I went to Brittany, the South of France and Lincolnshire where it was freezing. I now like the comfort of an htel, but saying that we're going to a caravan park in 3 weeks, and have the top of the range caravan. I have booked a holiday without telling DH but I knew he'd like it, a Valentine's weekend in Krakow. Surely your DH knows your views on camping.

Dddccc · 22/05/2021 11:21

Camping is great fun for kids has he bought an airbed for you to sleep on? Sounds like fun to me I normally camp in Scotland at the end of may and have always had nice weather and its more then warm enough you get blocks where the showers and toilets are, if you can I recommend putting up the tent before you go so you know how to do it and a 6 man tent will take 2 of you working together to put up

Morechocolatethanbarbara · 22/05/2021 11:21

He is not your dictator.

Let him take the kids and you stay home for a peaceful week, win-win.

Lweji · 22/05/2021 11:21

Well, just don't go. He can go alone with the children. Or he can rebook and resell the tent.

RealhousewifeofStoke · 22/05/2021 11:28

Urgh no chance. Hope he has a nice week away.

partyatthepalace · 22/05/2021 11:29

I’m sorry what?

Why do you put up with this twat?

Onesnowynight · 22/05/2021 11:31

That’s my idea of hell

Livelovebehappy · 22/05/2021 11:31

Would be my idea of hell. I don’t like Scotland, and dislike camping.

LouiseTrees · 22/05/2021 11:31

I’d let him go with the kids.

partyatthepalace · 22/05/2021 11:32

@Dddccc

Camping is great fun for kids has he bought an airbed for you to sleep on? Sounds like fun to me I normally camp in Scotland at the end of may and have always had nice weather and its more then warm enough you get blocks where the showers and toilets are, if you can I recommend putting up the tent before you go so you know how to do it and a 6 man tent will take 2 of you working together to put up
Spectacular missing of the point there @Dddccc
Bin85 · 22/05/2021 11:32

Has he bought good mattresses or beds otherwise I would be miserable.

osbertthesyrianhamster · 22/05/2021 11:33

Even if you get the loveliest of weather in that region, at this time of year, it is cold at night. I like to do long walking routes with friends (we usually do a bag transfer and B&B) the week before the English half-term as the weather is usually good but I would not fancy sleeping in a tent at night this far north, it was even chilly at night in Northumberland.

CatsPyjama · 22/05/2021 11:34

Hire a caravan. He can sleep in the bloody tent.

MrMucker · 22/05/2021 11:34

It's a six person tent, presumably quite swanky for that price, and a fridge, and there will only be four people using it, two of them not adult sized. If you're driving there (assumed) you can take airbeds, duvets, sports equipment, unlimited clothing, food treats, games, whatever. And it's all stored in the car for you right next to where you sleep.
So as far as camping goes, it's not exactly roughing it.
It is also a tent that can be used many times-you can book a site cheap as chips and not worry about paying to stay somewhere, over and over again.
I don't get how someone who has provided this as a surprise is then labelled selfish and controlling.
I also don't get why the concern is "I'm worried about showering" when you could be thinking of how the kids get to live unrestricted and wear themselves out like on no other holiday. They can also meet other kids and stay out later than usual, as you'll always have them in sight. They'll love it. They'll stop bickering too, if that's what they usually do, because fresh air.
And if the kids are worn out, you get more peace, shower facilities or not. You can read a book in peace, you can snooze, go for a wander, meet other campers, forget household chores, and sleep far better than usual.
So he's provided those opportunities for you, and you're annoyed?

Don't go them. All the more room for the three of them in the tent. But you'll feel a bit jealous when they get back, mind.

tenlittlecygnets · 22/05/2021 11:34

What was he thinking??? Do you usually discuss things like that? I'd go mad and would just not go. Not relaxing at all.

osbertthesyrianhamster · 22/05/2021 11:35

@Dddccc

Camping is great fun for kids has he bought an airbed for you to sleep on? Sounds like fun to me I normally camp in Scotland at the end of may and have always had nice weather and its more then warm enough you get blocks where the showers and toilets are, if you can I recommend putting up the tent before you go so you know how to do it and a 6 man tent will take 2 of you working together to put up
Volunteer to accompany this man and the kids so you can skivvy for him whilst he plays Disney dad then.

I spent a lot of my 20s camping, mostly wild camping.

Now? Fuck that. A motorhome/van is as close as I'll get to it and never during school hols.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 22/05/2021 11:36

700 for a second hand tent? Nope.

IEat · 22/05/2021 11:37

If he booked a lazy beach holiday (or something you like) you’d have been ok with the booking ? But because you don’t want to go camping you’re annoyed, does he like the holidays you normally go on?

CeeceeBloomingdale · 22/05/2021 11:38

I’d be raging that he did that without consulting you first. However I love D&G! Have stayed in southerners before, it’s fine, we aren’t really holiday camp people so just used it as a base. The money spent on the tent is ludicrous though, we are staying in a hot tub lodge in D&G for half term and paid significantly less than half the cost of your holiday and tent for 4 nights.

Notaroadrunner · 22/05/2021 11:39

@frazzledasarock

Wave them all off and have a relaxing time at home.

That’s what I’d do if DH ever books a camping trip. I don’t do camping, he knows it.

I wouldn’t stop him going with the children though

This is what I'd do.

There's no way in hell I'd go on a camping holiday. Dh once bought a tent but never assumed we'd be going away camping. Ds used it a few times with his mates, Dh and youngest Ds slept out in it once last summer. I asked Dh if he was doing a second night and even he said no way.

Do not feel like you have to go. He was totally unreasonable to book it without discussion and agreement.

ClarkeGriffin · 22/05/2021 11:40

Not unreasonable. I'd be furious, but I hate camping. We built houses for a reason, I'm not going backwards. Grin It's cold, uncomfortable and it's not enjoyable. Had to go camping with school once and I don't think I slept the whole time. It just wasn't comfortable.

I definitely wouldn't send him off on his own either. That's rewarding his stupidity, a week away on his own, no responsibilities for the kids.

He would have two options. He either sells the tent and gets a caravan or whatever booked instead, or he takes the kids on his own for the week of camping. Don't fix his mess, he made it.

Justilou1 · 22/05/2021 11:40

Tell him that you hope that he and the kids have a lovely time. (You can stay at home with the gin.)

Definitelyrandom · 22/05/2021 11:40

Haven’t been camping since I was a child and like a hotel room with an en-suite bathroom as much as anyone, but I don’t think I would be as upset as most here. Dumfries and Galloway is a lovely part of the world, and presumably the children would enjoy camping? Ours would have loved it (but would have been a bit sniffy about the children’s entertainment). Give it a go, OP, and you might actually enjoy it.