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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband won’t wear his wedding ring

152 replies

PleaseSendNoodles · 15/05/2021 16:10

I am aware this is not a big deal. My DH hardly ever wears his wedding ring. It’s just lobbed in a drawer. He says it’s uncomfortable and he’s ‘not a jewellery person’.

We bought one of those silicone ones as a compromise. It’s more practical for his kind of work and the gym etc... but he doesn’t wear that very often either.

I have zero concerns about him trying to convince other women he’s single.... it just irks me. AIBU?

OP posts:
Babymamamama · 15/05/2021 16:12

Well it depend if you trust him or not I guess. But I think YABU he’s an adult so he can wear or not wear what he likes.

tolerable · 15/05/2021 16:14

tatoo

Newkitchen123 · 15/05/2021 16:14

How is there a compromise to not liking wearing jewellery? You either like it or you don't

partyatthepalace · 15/05/2021 16:16

I understand you’d rather he did. But some people just don’t like the feel of rings. I think you can say you’d like him to - but if he chooses not to it’s up to him

user648482729 · 15/05/2021 16:16

I get that it’s an adjustment; DH had never worn rings before so he had to get used to it and almost persist through finding it a bit uncomfortable (he finally understands why I prefer liquid soap over bars of soap!) but I’d be hurt if he hadn’t at least tried.

mistermagpie · 15/05/2021 16:16

I very rarely wear mine, I think I've worn my rings once since Christmas. I couldn't be more committed to my husband and our marriage, I just find them a bit annoying to wear. It honestly means nothing unless there is some sort of back story where he is cheating or trying to appear single.

mistermagpie · 15/05/2021 16:17

In contrast btw, my DH has never taken his off since our wedding. But he likes wearing it and I don't.

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 15/05/2021 16:17

Why does it irk you? I don’t get why it would unless it’s the physical symbol to tell other women he is married.

Wearing a ring or not doesn’t have any impact on whether they will cheat, that’s down to the person not the jewellery

firstimemamma · 15/05/2021 16:17

Each to their own but it wouldn't bother me personally, not even remotely.

Roselilly36 · 15/05/2021 16:18

My DH has never worn his wedding ring, we have been happily married 27 years, DH never wears any jewellery not even a watch. Never been an issue for me. Never had any reason not to trust him.

Wafflewombat · 15/05/2021 16:18

I don't wear mine. It was getting bashed & scraped. I'd have lost it in the gym too, had I taken it off to lift. Plus rings are dangerous on some situations. It is no reflection on what I think about my marriage.

Partypoooooper · 15/05/2021 16:20

It's up to him surely so long as you love each other. If me and my partner marry I certainly won't be wearing one, doesn't make me love him any less

ShutUpAlex · 15/05/2021 16:20

I’m always taking my engagement ring off, I’m crap with jewellery. This is why we got a cheap one rather than an expensive one.

DrinkFeckArseBrick · 15/05/2021 16:21

I've stopped wearing mine. With all the extra hand washing plus cooking that I do it just gets in the way. It doesn't mean anything at all

CounsellorTroi · 15/05/2021 16:22

My DH wears his wedding ring on his right hand; for some reason it irritates the skin on his left hand.

thecognoscenti · 15/05/2021 16:23

I guess the answer is, how would you feel if he wanted you to wear something which served no practical purpose and which you found uncomfortable, all day, every day? It's no big deal OP, don't sweat it.

TheCrowening · 15/05/2021 16:25

I see rings as a token we gave to each other, not as a warning notice for other women.

Original poster
PleaseSendNoodles · 15/05/2021 16:26

Okay. This is good. It makes me feel better - mostly because I don’t know any other married people who don’t wear rings! So now I know there are plenty of other men and women who don’t, I’ll get over it 🙂 In reality I practically never wear my engagement ring, mostly because I forget / don’t want to lose it.

OP posts:
Original poster
PleaseSendNoodles · 15/05/2021 16:27

@TheCrowening

I see rings as a token we gave to each other, not as a warning notice for other women.
I guess maybe this is where my issue comes from? I had this romantic idea that he’d want to wear that symbol from me 🤷🏼‍♀️
OP posts:
Nuggetnugget · 15/05/2021 16:28

Mine doesn't wear his. He is extremely loyal and trustworthy.
He wears it on a Sunday as he usually isn't working and dresses up a bit.
I wouldnt make a deal of it. Its only a bit of jewellery.

Maireas · 15/05/2021 16:28

My husband has never had one, he doesn't like jewellery. No big deal. My brother and nephew don't either. Some people don't.

Figgygal · 15/05/2021 16:29

My husband has barely ever worn his
I’ve not worn mine in over a year got out of the habit when Covid hit and all the hand washing made me take it off
Doesn’t mean anything

SchrodingersImmigrant · 15/05/2021 16:29

My DH doesn't wear his. I do because I pike rings.
My Dad used to wear his, while my mum's was in a cupboard in a certain cup because she hates rings.

comedycentral · 15/05/2021 16:30

I haven't worn mine for such a long time. Never really like to wear rings.

DoubleHelix79 · 15/05/2021 16:30

My parents, who have been married almost 50 years have apparently stopped wearing theirs. They are very happy together and were amused at my raised eyebrow when I noticed. I'm obviously more conservative than my elderly parents...

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