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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I've been bad - damaged someone's car in carpark

368 replies

GuiltyMoo · 14/05/2021 17:02

I came back to my car in a supermarket car park to find that someone had parked their car with their passenger side way too close to my drivers side. So close that I couldn't get past their wingmirror to get to the door. So I had to bend my wingmirror in to squeeze past. Then I had to do contortions to open the door and then get in. I accidentally knocked their wingmirror out of position and dented and scratched their door doing so.

I confess that at that point I was so furious that I let my car door bang again against the other car. I then drove out of the space, stopped, got out and went back to put their wingmirror back in place.

I am now at home feeling super guilty, waiting for a knock on my door from the Police after they track me down from the carpark CCTV.

So, AIBU for squeezing into my car and causing the damage? Should I have gone back to the supermarket and had them call the driver to move their car so I could get in mine?

I'm a big worrier, and this will pop into my head for years to come, as another moment of shame.

OP posts:
Fixitup2 · 14/05/2021 17:33

[quote GuiltyMoo]@NoSquirrels

My car is old and the edge of the door is bare metal. Moving back to open my door, I knocked against their wingmirror. Trying to open the door wide enough for me to squeeze in needed a lot of effort resulting in pressure on their door.

But silly me, I should have used a lot more contortions getting this old, fat and arthritic body of mine through the passenger door of my tiny car and over into the driver's seat.

But I hear everyone. I was in the wrong and deserve punishment.[/quote]
Or you could have waited. Or gone into the supermarket for staff to tannoy the owner. Silly you doesn’t seem to actually care that you’ve done wrong. It upsets me that people think it’s fine to damage someone else’s property for them to pay to repair, you don’t know their financial situation m.

NerrSnerr · 14/05/2021 17:34

But silly me, I should have used a lot more contortions getting this old, fat and arthritic body of mine through the passenger door of my tiny car and over into the driver's seat.

You are aware that you're not supposed to purposely damage other people's property?

Were they parked over the lines?

pepsicolagirl · 14/05/2021 17:34

You were so full of grief and shame that you came home and boasted about it on the internet? Ok.

Welshmaenad · 14/05/2021 17:34

I'm yet to find a supermarket car park that has cctv soon wouldn't worry about it!

MargaretFraggle · 14/05/2021 17:35

I arrived back from the school run this week to find criminal damage on my car and reported it to the police. It is possible this person has too OP, sorry. No CCTV in my case.

GoodbyePorpoiseSpit · 14/05/2021 17:36

You’ve done wrong there op. Would you feel better if you went back to the shop to find the person/ ask for cctv? Or do you want to forget it and move on? Either way- no one here can really fix this!

Egghead81 · 14/05/2021 17:36

The OP won’t be back

She hoped for support
Instead she rightfully got told that she should indeed be ashamed

Not what she wanted to hear

Iheartmysmart · 14/05/2021 17:37

This pisses me off as well. I’ve got a small car so they think that they can park next to me with their wheels on or over the white line. I even came back to my car once to find someone actually in my space with their bonnet up against my boot. So their space and half of mine. Unfortunately for them my boot lid drops down not up like a hatchback. Fortunately for me their nice flash car made a nice boot rest while I loaded my shopping. Selfish cunts.

SuperMonkeys · 14/05/2021 17:37

Not much to be done now, but not sure why you asked really as clearly don't want dissenting answers.

An accident is an accident, purposely opening your door onto theirs in anger is very different.

Clymene · 14/05/2021 17:37

Had you parked absolutely bang in the centre of your space? Is your car big? Was theirs?

I think it's a pretty low thing to do. The only marks on my car are dents and scratches from people opening their doors really inconsiderately in supermarket car parks.

I now only shop in places with super wide spaces.

Newmumtobeee · 14/05/2021 17:39

Judging off of your need to make this post and the “guilt” you feel, I’d say you probably are aware that YABU. But then again, if you truly were ashamed of yourself, you’d have waited in the carpark for the person to return. Bit of a silly post on here in my opinion.

AmberIsACertainty · 14/05/2021 17:39

People saying the other driver parked badly, we don't even know that they did! Lots of car park spaces only have a foot at most, often less, either side when you've parked between the lines properly. The other driver might not have been parking inconsiderately at all.

Snackz · 14/05/2021 17:39

To all the people saying 'climb through the passenger side', what happens if the OP is disabled? Or has a baby that needs putting in their seat?!

cupsofcoffee · 14/05/2021 17:39

@Welshmaenad

I'm yet to find a supermarket car park that has cctv soon wouldn't worry about it!
It's not just CCTV that could catch her out.

There have been a few incidents here where people have hit or damaged cars and left the scene. Someone has seen what's happened (and taken down the numberplate) and gone to social media with it.

Each time, the person responsible was caught.

VainAbigail · 14/05/2021 17:40

You were bang out of order. You should have got your arse in the shop and asked them to announce for someone to shift the car.

You couldn’t give a flying fuck about deliberately damaging another persons car.

They won’t give a flying fuck about that old, fat and arthritic body of yours fitting through the passenger door of your tiny car and over into the driver's seat (your words). They now have a bill to pay to fix their car.

You haven’t answered the question of whether they were in the lines.

If this had been my car there’s no way I’d be able to afford to repair the damage but I’d find you and do it back to your car

You sound very smug about what you’ve done. If you’re that much of a worrier then you wouldn’t have posted in AIBU of all places.

motherloaded · 14/05/2021 17:40

Good for you OP. People can be selfish arse, never hurt to teach them a lesson.

Back in the real world, no one would "wait" until the driver of the other comes back. Hmm

Same people take great pride in ignoring warning stickers and parking too close to vehicles who need space for wheelchairs, if their car end up with a scratch, they can only blame themselves.

Next time make it look like an accident and that you didn't notice Grin

AnUnoriginalUsername · 14/05/2021 17:40

Had they actually parked over the line?

cupsofcoffee · 14/05/2021 17:40

@Snackz

To all the people saying 'climb through the passenger side', what happens if the OP is disabled? Or has a baby that needs putting in their seat?!
Then she could have waited, or asked customer services to put out an announcement.
motherloaded · 14/05/2021 17:40

If they don't care about damaging YOUR car parking so close, why should you care about their car?

Zancah · 14/05/2021 17:41

Someone once did the exact thing to me, except they parked so close I actually couldn't even get between them as I was enormously pregnant.

I still climbed over from the passenger side. Did myself a real mischief too, but it would never have entered my head to scratch their car on purpose or duff up their car with my door.

Sillawithans · 14/05/2021 17:41

I hope you get caught.

This happened to my brother years ago with a hire car, cost him something like 800.
What terrible behaviour from you.
If you're really sorry you could always leave your details with supermarket in case other customer damaged car. But you won't.

Snackz · 14/05/2021 17:42

@cupsofcoffee Easier said than done! Why should people 'have to wait' because people can't park properly?!

Original poster
GuiltyMoo · 14/05/2021 17:42

@pepsicolagirl

I am not boasting. I do feel guilt and wanted others views. I have received them, have taken them on board and will seriously consider my next steps.

Thank you everyone for your honest opinions of my actions. I will not be posting further.

OP posts:
CovidCorvid · 14/05/2021 17:43

I’ve had this happen twice and both times the guilty party was on cctv. Hope you get caught. Last time the damage was £900 and I got the police involved. They were told to pay up or face criminal damage charges.

Egghead81 · 14/05/2021 17:43

@motherloaded

If they don't care about damaging YOUR car parking so close, why should you care about their car?
But they didn’t damage it They were inconsiderate

More to the point, is this the kind of thinking you would pass on to your children (if you have them)

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