to think it shouldn’t be on my daughter to delete her social media?

[Daytimetellysucks]

DD (16) had some issues with a boy in her class. He had a crush on her, he asked DD out, she said no (not interested/she already has a boyfriend).

The boy took it badly and seemed to see her as some kind of challenge and subjected her to some wildly inappropriate behaviour, both online and in real life.

DD would block him, and he’d either create new accounts or use someone else’s phone to continue to message her or he would hang around outside our house hiding behind the bushes until she left for school or something.

I warned him off, DH warned him off, all her friends and her boyfriend warned him off, even her big sister and her boyfriend had words (and DD1 is enough to scare anyone) but he was completely obsessed.

Due to some additional needs that DD has, she has a mentor in school so we spoke to the mentor who had words at school, and we reported it to the police.

The police were great, spoke with school and visited him at home with his parents and warned him about his behaviour. He was clearly told that if he contacted her again, either directly or indirectly, he would be arrested.

All good. Her mentors have kept a close eye on it at school and all has been well for the last few weeks

Until this weekend. He sent DD a nasty, abusive message from a different number, and she then started getting some grief from a couple of his friends. DD blocked them all again.

I contacted the police again, gave then the original crime reference number so they had all the history and sent over screen shots of all the messages.

Their response - we can’t do anything, tell DD to change her number and delete all her social media.

We’re in the process of getting a new number, but she doesn’t want to delete her social media accounts, especially while we’re still in lockdown and she’s not allowed friends/her boyfriend over

She doesn’t post photos or anything like that but her friendship group all use Instagram DMs, group Facebook messenger and chats on WhatsApp. Her and her friends use WhatsApp video calls and revise together, she’s in a group video call and group chats for an Xbox game she plays so if she deletes all her social media she’ll end up cut off from all this.

I’ve gone back and asked for the original officers who dealt with it to look at it again - they’re on rest days at the moment so am waiting for them to contact me

Hopefully, once she’s changed her number they won’t be able to contact her via WhatsApp and stuff, but she hasn’t actually done anything wrong here so she shouldn’t have to remove herself from social media

Oh OP, this is just awful for your DD. He is lying and manipulating and stalking. I cannot begin to imagine how stressful it is for her right now. I'm glad her year group at school are appalled by his behaviour. She needs support from her peers and school to be able to make her statement to police. I hope they are able to do something to stop him harassing and stalking more girls in future, because he will move onto to someone else and his behaviour will get more serious. I think he's at high risk of hurting someone one day.
I'm glad she has a great family who are so supportive 💐

I don’t condone this, but something similar happened to one of my cousins. Albeit she was a bit older. He did the whole bushes outside her house thing etc. The only thing that worked was her Uncle basically threatening to break his legs with a metal bar if her came near her again. She never heard from him from that moment on, I’m not condone it but sometimes a sharp shock like that is the only thing that will work when the police won’t do their job properly. This. It’s not PC to say it, but reality is that most bullies are cowards, and usually someone standing up to them is what it takes to bring them down a peg or ten.

If it was my child I’d be finding a couple of menacing relatives to go round and have a words.

The reality is that the softly softly approach isn’t working. So sometimes one has to take the matter into one’s own hands.

Oh, and if it was my DS I’d be getting a couple of sinister relatives to come round and have a word. The parents should be ashamed of themselves.

Sounds like he's found The Red Pill. So sorry to hear what you're DD is going through, OP. Wishing her strength, what a disgusting little degenerate this boy is.

Your poor daughter. You sound like a fantastic, supportive mum. I’m shocked at that police advice. The little shit should be arrested

@BlueVelvetStars

She knows he's doing all this to STOP her giving a statement. Please explain to her that giving this Statement helps create a footprint of his behaviour, so that in time when he does this to others, the footprint is there. It needs to be on record, otherwise he will get away with treating people like this forever.

Please help her find the strength and courage to give her Statement. 🌸

This. He needs to be dealt with robustly. Otherwise his appalling behaviour will continue or get worse, and we know his parents won't stop him. The school need to deal much more firmly, although her year group sound great. Another Internet stranger offering support to your DD and thinking that @Daytimetellysucks is doing a fabulous job

Id ask for it in writing and send it to your MP for comment.