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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Cat got run over [Content warning added by MNHQ - graphic description]

141 replies

bettertimesareacoming · 11/05/2021 06:00

Hi I am just wondering if you all think I am being unreasonable. My partner seems to think I am and lost patience with me lastnight telling me this stuff happens all the time and it's just a cat .

Coming home from shopping lastnight and I see a few people at the side of the road . I noticed it was a cat and as I drove closer it was covered in blood . I jump out and ask what happened and they said a man had drove over him and drive off . They didn't know what to do with him but picked him off the road .

I grabbed a towel and picked him up and took him in the car . He was covered in blood and screaming . The smell of the blood was horrific. I was phoning around vets and finally found one half hour away . All I could hear was the cat struggling to breath the whole way . Finally got him to the vets and when they picked him up I noticed the extent of the injuries . He had been hit on the head and the force had knocked his eyes out and broke his jaw . He was crying and his mouth was in hell of a mess . I just broke down . They asked if I wanted to stay and I did .

The bet took a look and said the best thing to do was to pts but it was my decision. I said yes . No one has come forward saying this cat is theirs. I have been asking around all night .

It has really shock me up . I'm still a mess in work now . I can't stop thinking of the suffering he went thought and what kind of person does that and drives off ! I just feel so upset and can't snap out of it .

Stupid question really because I am an animal lover but is it normal to feel the way I am ? I felt guilty all last night because I could see I was doing my partners head in being upset .

I spent over an hour cleaning all the blood and fur out of my car too . So getting in it this morning made me worse !

OP posts:
MissMogwai · 12/05/2021 20:29

You poor thing, that's awful. If that was my cat I would take comfort that someone so kind was with them at the end.

It would be really weird if you weren't upset at such an experience, so your partner sounds very cold and mean. Look after yourself and cry all you want.

Forgottenyeti · 12/05/2021 20:33

You sound so lovely OP. Hope you're feeling a bit better.

DaphneDuBois · 12/05/2021 20:34

You poor thing. I’d like to hope that whoever left it didn’t do so because they are cruel and hard but because they felt so terrible they couldn’t bear to see. Not sure if that’s any comfort really, but I am so sorry you had to see such suffering. You did the kindest thing you could to give the cat the best chance.

bettertimesareacoming · 12/05/2021 23:37

@Unobtainium

I just re-read your OP and updates and honestly *@bettertimesareacoming* you have a heart of pure gold, your partner is a douchebag and you deserve so much better. Thank you again on behalf of pet owners, cat lovers and those of us who struggle to think of any living creature suffering, thank you so much for what you did for the cat, you were so kind. You have properly touched my heart.
Thankyou so much for this ❤️
OP posts:
Judith0000 · 13/05/2021 00:38

Is it possible that the driver was traumatised and couldn't cope with stopping and checking the cat?
I have been driving a number of years now, but my reaction to anything running in front of my car hasn't changed.
I brake, hard! Sometimes it's not enough and in the past, I have hit birds and squirrels.
It stays with me for a very long time. I plan every journey now so as to avoid country lanes or roads surrounded by fields where deer graze.
I drive at a maximum of 20 mph in residential areas and I no longer enjoy driving, after years of living in the countryside and seeing various animals jump out in front of vehicles. I avoid driving whenever possible now.
While I can sympathise with cat owners, I find cat owners often dont empathise with drivers, and dont seem to care about the effect it has on the drivers when they allow their pets to roam free and they run out in front of vehicles.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 13/05/2021 01:04

I'm actually crying here. My fault though I should never have opened the thread. You absolutely did the right thing. Thank you for being there to love and comfort him in his last moments. Your DH was very cruel and cold in what he said Of course its not only a cat!!!!. That so called 'only a cat' had a life that he had a right to live just like him.
I'll never get my head around people who don't love and care about animals. No one is ever going to convince me that they're not weirdos. What's not love They love with out condition. They don't judge you. They're loyal and They'd certainly show some people a thing or 2 about compassion.

lollipoprainbow · 13/05/2021 07:16

Is it possible that the driver was traumatised and couldn't cope with stopping and checking the cat?

Highly unlikely !!

bettertimesareacoming · 13/05/2021 10:34

Morning everyone I seriously can't believe all the lovely comments on here . I was expecting loads of people to tell me to get over it . I'm so happy and glad there are so many people still with good hearts ❤️ . I get scared that the generation now have completely lost most emotion . They just prefer to take photos and film for social media 😢. I really hope that was the case with the driver not stopping but I unfortunately don't think it was . I do feel a lot better today I just keep thinking that he's out of pain now and also I googled about accidents and they say adrenaline takes over and they can't feel pain . And I really hope that's what happened. As for my partner , I think he lacks any kind of emotion because of his family and they way he was brought up . No love and if something bad happened it was never talked about they just got on with things . I was brought up completely different. Especially with my Nan just constant kindness and love . After the cat got put down I went back in and have a donation . I mentioned it to my partner who replied . Jesus made of money you are 😳. I didn't reply I did want to punch him tho x

OP posts:
skybluee · 13/05/2021 10:53

If the cat was clinging to you and felt safe please know that its last moments were of you being with it instead of it dying alone in the road. It was holding onto you and knew you were there. It doesnt matter that you werent with it at the literal last moment, what matters is that you helped it.

It sounds horrible and I don't think you're being over-sensitive. It was all very close to you so it's bound to affect you.

PopsicleHustler · 13/05/2021 10:57

Poor old cat. I feel so sorry for it but it's at peace now....

Don't beat yourself up over it. You did a terrific thing getting the poor mite to the vet. What a horrible thing that happened. And the extent of its injuries sounded totally brutal. Am so sorry you had to go through all of that but it's what it is. At least the little mite isn't suffering anymore. And I hope karma gets the person who ran him over!!!!

KaleSlayer · 13/05/2021 14:41

I mentioned it to my partner who replied . Jesus made of money you are

😔 You really do deserve much better OP. This was just an unnecessary, shitty comment at a time you were feeling sad. You’re too kind and good for him. I hope you know that. Flowers

KittyKatChonky · 13/05/2021 14:45

I think it’s illegal to hit a dog and just drive off. You’re supposed to report it. The same should happen if you hit a cat.

Rhythmisadancer · 13/05/2021 14:49

you sound lovely. Your partner, not so much. You did the right thing, and I'm not surprised you've been affected by it.

Pancakeorcrepe · 13/05/2021 16:11

You sound lovely and did the right thing. I hope you can find peace in the fact you have reduced the suffering of this kitty.
Your partner sounds awful, you deserve so much better! ✨✨✨

HalfTermHalfTerm · 14/05/2021 08:26

@KittyKatChonky

I think it’s illegal to hit a dog and just drive off. You’re supposed to report it. The same should happen if you hit a cat.
It is illegal, yes. I think it dates back to a time when you needed some sort of licence to own a dog so they were seen as legal property in a way that cats weren’t. I might be wrong on that though!

Hopefully if the law is changed so that cats legally need to be microchipped they will also make it illegal to not stop if you hit a cat.

I hope you’re doing OK today OP. You sound absolutely lovely, I’m sorry your partner is being so unpleasant to you Flowers

bettertimesareacoming · 14/05/2021 08:50

Morning everyone , today I am feeling a lot happier . I truly want to thank everyone who has took the time and commented on my thread . You have all helped me so much . I don't get the fact either how it is illegal to hit a dog and not stop but not a cat 😳. I wish it was the case for all animals to be honest . It's made because my driving instructor told me when I suddenly slammed on the breaks to never do it for any animal because it could cause an accident . I have slammed on nearly every day lately with all the birds and rabbits about . Also I drive through country lanes everyday . But before I do I always have a quick look in my mirror to make sure no one is behind me . I checked up on the owner of the cat last night and I think it has only now hit her fully on what has happened . She has him home now too as she had him cremated ❤️ xxx

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