Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To never work full time. Ever!

300 replies

Egghead81 · 09/05/2021 11:35

I work three days a week.
Two primary children, almost secondary.
Child maintenance plus salary plus rental income from a buy to let means very comfortable but not “rolling it in” ie high end holidays but I’ll shop around relentlessly for best deal rather than just book without thinking; nice car but second hand; cash savings that would be sufficient to cover six months but were not talking hundreds of thousands!

I like my job but don’t love it. I do however LOVE my two days off. They feel like a mini holiday every time. I don’t want to lose that! Not even when children are teens and grown up.

Anyone else have absolutely no intention of ever going full time?! Even though with more money would more of everything you already afford or better (rather than actually adding anything if you see what I mean)

OP posts:
Narwhalsh · 09/05/2021 14:55

Would definitely suggest as others you look at your pension and work out if it’s going to pay out for what you have planned for retirement. If you want to work until you’re nearly 70 then retire on 30k a year then check your current pit and projected contributions and growth will work for that. If you want to retire at 60 then you’ll need a much larger pot to cover those extra years. Plan for retirement sooner rather than later!

Thewinterofdiscontent · 09/05/2021 14:56

@lulugee

You do sound smug, and unambiguous - but each to their own

Not sure what you hope to achieve with the thread?

Completely

Everyone’s parents will die. Not everyone will get left a house when they do.That the smug bit.

What’s the point of the question. Maybe if your a niche surgeon or something it might be morally the right thing so you’d save more lives. Otherwise just get on and enjoy the advantages other people have given you.

Livelovebehappy · 09/05/2021 14:57

Lucky you, having the option. Most of us who work full time would love a better work/life balance but unfortunately we have to work to live. I had to work f/t throughout my DCs childhood and it was crap. But I had no choice.

Congressdingo · 09/05/2021 15:00

@ElspethFlashman

I work 3 days a week.

We can afford it (just). However my pension situation isn't great. I will likely be one of those people working until the OAP kicks in.

However my pension wouldn't be much improved by going full time as I changed careers late in life so won't have that many years built up regardless, iykwim. So the difference in the end would probably not justify me going full time. I am putting as much as I can into it now to try to improve it a bit.

Also we live very frugally. My kids haven't yet been abroad, for example. We shop in Aldi only. I tend to buy very cheap clothes and toiletries.

However the benefit to my mental health = priceless. So there is absolutely no way I'd go back full time even if it means frugality forever.

Similar for me. I do 23 hours a week,and that's plenty enough. My kids are grown now and although I'll probably have to work until state pension age at the moment I'm ok with that and if that changes then I will cope just fine. I'm not totally frugal but I do shop in aldi and (currently not buying clothing) spend what I want on good quality clothing that will last. But I was for many many years a skint single parent, deciding whether to heat the home or cook food. Its unlikely but if I had to do that again, I know I could. I would prefer if it came to it to spend less, eat 20p noodles again (they were 6p back then) than go full time and be very unhappy.
Whenwillitmakesense · 09/05/2021 15:10

Life is short - if you can afford it and it makes you happy - part time is the way to go.

ThatIsMyPotato · 09/05/2021 15:12

@MrsMaizel what is she going to do between retiring and then ?
I'm assuming she won't be able to retire and will have to work part time right until she is in a care home. Or live off her rental income.

Original poster
Egghead81 · 09/05/2021 15:14

@rarzy

Although I would like to know what he's invested in to He has built up a fortune for each child.

Even on 80k that's tricky particularly when funding 2 households!

He inherited a very sizeable amount and put 80% in to various funds for the children. I actually said I thought it was excessive but not my business
OP posts:
Soulstirring · 09/05/2021 15:15

Not unreasonable and very lucky! I had a friend who worked part time, loved it but completely held it over us full time workers. Very disdainful of full time working mums. I didn’t get it. It’s not always a choice, and even if it is it’s a very personal thing. If you’re happy then you do you!

Original poster
Egghead81 · 09/05/2021 15:16

@JinglingHellsBells

How does your ex feel about you only working 3 days if he is working full time to provide for your children? *@Egghead81* Regardless of anything else, that seems a little skewed if your children are Yr 6- 7, almost in secondary school, and are becoming more independent.
He is very happy three days. When we were married it was his focus that I was a sahm He’s all about the children
OP posts:
cupsofcoffee · 09/05/2021 15:16

@ThatIsMyPotato

If you can afford 5+ years of care home fees go for it
What an odd thing to say.
Original poster
Egghead81 · 09/05/2021 15:17

@Confusedaboutlots

not to mention she inherited some of her fortune - i’m sure OP would rather not have inherited if her loved one could still be here
Correct
OP posts:
MrsJBaptiste · 09/05/2021 15:17

I work 30 hours (although full time is only 35) and do love my 3 day weekends. However now my kids are at High School, I am thinking I should go full time. The option is there so it's up to me but I just can't decide!

I generally work 35 hours a week anyway with the early starts and late finishes so might as well get paid for it. However once I go back full time, I doubt I'll ever be part time again which is difficult to get my head around!

Original poster
Egghead81 · 09/05/2021 15:18

@missbunnyrabbit

Also I'm only 26. Feel like I'll be judged for wanting to go part-time so young, but hopefully it'll be granted to me. I don't want to live to work anymore.
You go for it
OP posts:
ThatIsMyPotato · 09/05/2021 15:18

cupsofcoffee just pointing out that end of life care is expensive and once you are that age your earning potential is reduced

Original poster
Egghead81 · 09/05/2021 15:19

@MrsMaizel

and you said you don't even know when your children's maintenance ends ? 😬 Have you got a life insurance policy in place against those payments in the event of his death ?
Yes We both do It was a part of the financial order We are the beneficiaries of one another’s
OP posts:
MrsTroutfire · 09/05/2021 15:24

The reason posters get annoyed about these type of threads is because working part time forever is the taboo female privilege that nobody wants to acknowledge (and usually try to dress up as a hardship against the privilege of working).

User6587324 · 09/05/2021 15:25

YANBU I have always worked part time since DS was born in 1992, 2-4 days a week, depending on how much work there was and childcare etc and how I felt, when I got to 60, I took my final salary pension and worked 2 days semi retired but gave up the 2 days a week when covid hit as I hated WFH.

Daphnesmate05 · 09/05/2021 15:25

cupsofcoffee just pointing out that end of life care is expensive and once you are that age your earning potential is reduced

I'm actually concerned about our fairly substantial assets (not inherited...worked for) being seized by the state to pay for care home fees and there being no inheritance for my dc...this is a possibility too.

MrsTroutfire · 09/05/2021 15:28

met my partner who also worked part time (45 hours over 3 days, HGV driver)

Is this in the UK? 15 hours all inclusive is the absolute legal limit to a driver's shift length and most companies won't let their drivers run this close to the line.

If you tick over to 15 hours and two minutes you've got an infringement recorded on your tacho card and the truck's tacho head.

User6587324 · 09/05/2021 15:29

DH went P/T at 55 and then retired at 60 so he is not still trundling on at work either

OverTheRubicon · 09/05/2021 15:33

@MrsTroutfire

The reason posters get annoyed about these type of threads is because working part time forever is the taboo female privilege that nobody wants to acknowledge (and usually try to dress up as a hardship against the privilege of working).
Except that many women who have worked part time forever are absolutely screwed when men leave, or die early, and/or they get old and have no provision past a partial state pension. Many of these women (like my MIL) also have husbands who enjoy not doing any part of the house and child related work... Which I imagine is quite enjoyable when you have older DCs and/or they've left home, but like my MIL they might find it extremely frustrating when their DH is retired but their 'job' of cooking and cleaning is properly until death do you part.

Do I wish I could survive on a 3 day a week salary? Yes. Do I envy most women in that actual situation, or think it is actually an enduring privilege? No

Sciurus83 · 09/05/2021 15:34

*@mrstroutfire

The reason posters get annoyed about these type of threads is because working part time forever is the taboo female privilege that nobody wants to acknowledge*

Aye, nice an all but you need someone else to be footing the bill.....

SpeakingFranglais · 09/05/2021 15:35

@WetF1reDay82942

I would rather work FT when younger, save & pay into a pension

Who wants to be working FT at state pension age of 68+ ?

I plan to retire before 68

Yes. This is what I did for 35 years, worked FT and we are now very comfortable and I have a decent pension banked in my own right that I can draw on in five years. I reduced my hours to 3 days a week a year ago and I love it and will never work FT again but I wouldn’t have done it when younger.
AIMD · 09/05/2021 15:36

I don’t blame you.
I work 4 days a week. I’ve no intention of working more unless I have to. I like my midweek day off as it gives me one to one time with my daughter and also a day for shopping/cleaning. I could up my houses when she starts school but me having that time to shop/clean/do random chores means we all benefit from more time together at weekends.

User6587324 · 09/05/2021 15:36

I worked P/T and have quite a good final salary pension which I took at 60 so no-one is footing the bill, I have my own income, house was quite cheap, £60k, so mortgage was small.