To never work full time. Ever!

[Egghead81]

I work three days a week.
Two primary children, almost secondary.
Child maintenance plus salary plus rental income from a buy to let means very comfortable but not “rolling it in” ie high end holidays but I’ll shop around relentlessly for best deal rather than just book without thinking; nice car but second hand; cash savings that would be sufficient to cover six months but were not talking hundreds of thousands!

I like my job but don’t love it. I do however LOVE my two days off. They feel like a mini holiday every time. I don’t want to lose that! Not even when children are teens and grown up.

Anyone else have absolutely no intention of ever going full time?! Even though with more money would more of everything you already afford or better (rather than actually adding anything if you see what I mean)

Two words - pension forecast.

@Grenlei

This from the OP who posted asking to 'borrow' someone's Which login to help her decide what TV to buy

I don't think really OP you're in a position to be sniggering at anyone else's posts...

I’m a tight arse!

But if anyone is willing to give me some advice on best smart TVs... then I’d be super grateful!

Inherited from my ex and no idea where to start as so bloody many options!

@Dweetfidilove

*Grenlei

This from the OP who posted asking to 'borrow' someone's Which login to help her decide what TV to buy hmm

I don't think really OP you're in a position to be sniggering at anyone else's posts...*

OP did say she shops around relentlessly looking for deals, so stands to reason she doesn't want to pay for a Which review. All part of keeping her spending within reason.

Exactamento!

My husband and I are having regular arguments about this very issue

Our youngest is due to start school in September I have been part time four days a week since eldest started nursery in 2012.

I have never intended to return to work on a full-time basis on Fridays whilst in current job.
I spend my time cleaning, shopping, walking the dog and have some activities with the youngest that obviously I won’t be continuing as he will be in school but me being off will benefit the household.

I don’t want to be committed to working five days a week as like not having the childcare to worry about on that day when it comes to school holidays. It means I can do things in the week and can avoid them creeping into the weekends to the detriment of husband and the children.
I’m already the higher earner and if I went full time it would push me over 50 K which means we would lose our child benefit.
Our childcare bills will clearly disappear other than some after-school costs so our finances don’t require me to return ft
It’s just jealousy he says to me why do I think I deserve a day off in the week I’ve said to him if his employer would allow him to go part time then fine (despite the loss of cb).

Worklife balance is so important

@Figgygal

My husband and I are having regular arguments about this very issue

Our youngest is due to start school in September I have been part time four days a week since eldest started nursery in 2012.

I have never intended to return to work on a full-time basis on Fridays whilst in current job.
I spend my time cleaning, shopping, walking the dog and have some activities with the youngest that obviously I won’t be continuing as he will be in school but me being off will benefit the household.

I don’t want to be committed to working five days a week as like not having the childcare to worry about on that day when it comes to school holidays. It means I can do things in the week and can avoid them creeping into the weekends to the detriment of husband and the children.
I’m already the higher earner and if I went full time it would push me over 50 K which means we would lose our child benefit.
Our childcare bills will clearly disappear other than some after-school costs so our finances don’t require me to return ft
It’s just jealousy he says to me why do I think I deserve a day off in the week I’ve said to him if his employer would allow him to go part time then fine (despite the loss of cb).

Worklife balance is so important

I don't mean to be rude but your husband is being an ass of the highest order. He might have something to complain about if you were working 2 days a week or something. It's not as if you were even having bleeding spa days or anything - shopping, cleaning and walking the dog, what a self indulgent cow! These activities benefit everyone and the financial impact seems negligible so it comes down to pure jealousy, not so much of your day off as of your capacity to manage your life and time well. The 'it's well for some' brigade often don't have the balls or couldn't be arsed figuring out how to order their own lives to make them better, hence turning on those who do.

@Figgygal

My husband and I are having regular arguments about this very issue

Our youngest is due to start school in September I have been part time four days a week since eldest started nursery in 2012.

I have never intended to return to work on a full-time basis on Fridays whilst in current job.
I spend my time cleaning, shopping, walking the dog and have some activities with the youngest that obviously I won’t be continuing as he will be in school but me being off will benefit the household.

I don’t want to be committed to working five days a week as like not having the childcare to worry about on that day when it comes to school holidays. It means I can do things in the week and can avoid them creeping into the weekends to the detriment of husband and the children.
I’m already the higher earner and if I went full time it would push me over 50 K which means we would lose our child benefit.
Our childcare bills will clearly disappear other than some after-school costs so our finances don’t require me to return ft
It’s just jealousy he says to me why do I think I deserve a day off in the week I’ve said to him if his employer would allow him to go part time then fine (despite the loss of cb).

Worklife balance is so important

This sounds like an u happy situation.

Unhappy

yanbu, if you can afford it and it makes you happy then that's fine.

I am 42 and have worked full time for 3 years in total. The rest of the time has all been part time. I currently work 2 days a week term time only. My dh isn't a big earner (£32k) and more money would be lovely but I love working part time and will do it for as long as is possible.

Yanbu, i am almost ft but not quite and i value the one day off per fortnight so much. More than money, even though i coul do with more money

@DolphinFC

What exactly is the point of this thread!

Fantasy

@MrsTroutfire
I think it's also worth saying that for a man, working FT in a well paid job, while also having children, is in many if not most cases facilitated by a woman who is working PT or is a SAHM or is at the very least the "available parent" for a child who is ill or has a school trip or an activity that requires daytime presence of a parent or caregiver.

That does not make it wrong for all people or couples. Nor does it mean that the FT worker is necessarily getting the better deal. But I think it's worth mentioning

Mrs Troutfire, I am working and my partner is also working fulltine. I am not facilitated to work fulltime by having a part timer as my other half. Any jobs with dcs or household jobs, I do these in the eves and weekends. I am strict about not doing more than my required hours at work. If I did work unpaid overtime, I would never get dcs homework or housework done. I believe I am facilitating myself to work, by using my annual leave and time wisely, ensuring all household tasks and issues with dcs are done, paying for childcare, not socialising or 'wasting time'.

I work part time 10-3 Mon to Fri. I plan to go full time once youngest goes to uni in 3 years time I'll probably work full time for about 6/7 years until we retire if all goes according to plan.

I love working pt, but want to earn as much money as possible before I stop work altogether to bump up savings and pension etc.

I wouldn't blame anyone for permanently working pt if finances allow. Time for just chilling/hobbies/socialising/fitness is important.

But DH works ft and is on a good salary which is why I can afford pt.

People asking what is the point of the thread 🤔🙄 is the balance of more time or more money one of most universal dilemmas???

@Figgygal that's difficult. I can see your DHs pov. It's "fairer" if you both work ft but only if household chores etc are equally split.

Hope you can come to an agreement you're both happy with.

"As he's a high earner he pays considerably more than half the cost of the children and OP uses that extra to subsidise herself."

No she uses is to maintain the children's lifestyles, the lifestyle they had when their dad lived there - the family home, a reliable car, a mum who is around to do the school run twice a week, other treats and luxuries.

Strange to think of there being a basic "cost" to the children and anything above that is being wasted on the mother! There is a minimum standard to put food on the table. Most of us aim for something a bit more than that if we can, and splitting up with your spouse does not mean your dc now only deserve food and shelter (and not xboxes and holidays and new shoes).

@MoiraNotRuby

I don't know if you mean to but you sound very smug. I don't think I could morally be a landlord and profit from my tenants. So I will carry on working full time - but enjoy your mini holiday....

Hilarious. We own a buy to let, had no idea it made us morally bankrupt? Who knew?

I shall chuck our lovely tenants out on the street and invite some random strangers to squat there for free. I can't see a single problem with doing that. At all.

So much jealously on here...

Everyone asking What happens when the child maintenance stops? obviously (catastrophes aside) it stops when the children are of working age hence her expenses go down.

Good for you OP. I'd do the same in your shoes. Practically everyone in the world says if they won the lotto they'd work less or not at all, yet somehow it's "unethical" that you do! Green eyed monsters for sure.

[quote Amboseli]**@Figgygal that's difficult. I can see your DHs pov. It's "fairer" if you both work ft but only if household chores etc are equally split.

Hope you can come to an agreement you're both happy with.[/quote]
That's nuts, so you think @Figgygal should decrease her own quality of life and also that of the rest of the household so that it's now 'fair'. Will her husband be made any happier by her being more unhappy? OP has said she uses that (one!) day to do very productive household oriented things so I can't understand how he or anyone else could think anything other than 'that's great'.

@Countrycode

So much jealously on here...

Everyone asking What happens when the child maintenance stops? obviously (catastrophes aside) it stops when the children are of working age hence her expenses go down.

Good for you OP. I'd do the same in your shoes. Practically everyone in the world says if they won the lotto they'd work less or not at all, yet somehow it's "unethical" that you do! Green eyed monsters for sure.

It was the Op starting a thread when it’s clearly she doesn’t actually need the advice. She gas enough income to do what she wants with regards to work.

@Thewinterofdiscontent

I certainly wasn’t asking AIBU for advice!

I was asking for others in the same boat to share their stories - and I’ve enjoyed reading them!

I think I used the phrase “no intention” on my OP, which does sort of indicate that “advice” wasn’t what I was after!

I work three days and intend to keep doing so when my youngest is in school. I felt utterly exhausted when I worked full time (teacher) and didn’t feel like I had a balance. It works for us! Life’s too short!

I do school hours. I hated FT. Couldnt get kids apts sorted. Chased our tails. Less wages now but life easier