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AIBU?

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Original poster

John Barrowman put his dick on co-star's shoulder

442 replies

Star555 · 08/05/2021 01:22

John Barrowman as Captain Jack Harkness has (had?) been my all-time favourite Doctor Who character. I knew JB has a history of indecently exposing himself on set multiple times, but today I learned that he not only exposed his dick repeatedly but also non-consensually touched fellow actors with it -- like Camille Coduri (who played Rose Tyler's mum)!

AIBU to think that he got away with this only because he is gay? If he had been straight, wouldn't non-consensually putting his dick on his female co-star's body from behind have landed him loads of trouble already? I was utterly shocked to watch the video -- I don't know how I should be feeling after learning that my favourite Doctor Who actor behaved in this despicable manner. Shock

OP posts:
CandyLeBonBon · 09/05/2021 17:04

@longwayoff

I think Jarvis should be offered a stroll through on Doctor Who. He could definitely cast a sardonic eye over the lot of them and might even disrupt the space time continuum. And I bet he could do it without dropping his pants.
Jarvis cocker should BE Doctor Who!
pollymere · 09/05/2021 17:24

It's not acceptable in KS1. It's not acceptable for a grown adult. End of.

CallmeBadJanet · 09/05/2021 17:25

@Fuckingcrustybread Spot on! Fecking love you!

Toomuchtrouble4me · 09/05/2021 17:29

I don’t agree that social pressure made her say she wasn’t bothered - she wasn’t bothered! She didn’t HAVE to add ‘because he’s adorable’ she wasn’t bothered. Sometimes things are just what they seem. Agree with first poster - context is everything.

Peppermintpatty24 · 09/05/2021 17:31

Star555 You are 100% spot on.

CandyLeBonBon · 09/05/2021 17:31

@Toomuchtrouble4me

I don’t agree that social pressure made her say she wasn’t bothered - she wasn’t bothered! She didn’t HAVE to add ‘because he’s adorable’ she wasn’t bothered. Sometimes things are just what they seem. Agree with first poster - context is everything.
Did she tell you that personally?
DeeleysMum · 09/05/2021 17:32

He's a dirty bastard, end of. Not to mention how he's made his female co stars feel, how must his husband feel? Pretty sure my husband wouldn't get away with whipping his dick out at every opportunity. He needs to be called out, it's not acceptable. All those that think this isn't an issue, ask yourself how you'd feel if he put his dick on your 16 year olds shoulder, or worse, younger.

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 09/05/2021 17:33

@Toomuchtrouble4me

I don’t agree that social pressure made her say she wasn’t bothered - she wasn’t bothered! She didn’t HAVE to add ‘because he’s adorable’ she wasn’t bothered. Sometimes things are just what they seem. Agree with first poster - context is everything.
Thing is, it doesn't matter because ONE person "not being bothered" by what is very clearly inappropriate behaviour means that the offender thinks it's ok and then everybody else who IS bothered then has to put up with it. Creating a culture problem within that workplace. I'm pretty thick skinned and if someone in the staff room was being a twat I'd highly likely not give a fuck what they think of me. I still have a duty to call it out though and let them know it's not acceptable even though I'm personally not bothered by why they say.
Pintosmash · 09/05/2021 17:33

The context is, you are at work, keep your dick away? It's not just her that he's done it to, he's done it for years.

lifeissweet · 09/05/2021 17:33

[quote SunsetBeetch]Oh and Jarvis didn't expose his arse. He lifts his jacket up at one point, but is wearing something underneath anyway.

(Timestamp is 4.45).

[/quote] Thanks for that. Made me laugh again.

My DB calls that song 'what about elephants'. It is pompous and ridiculous.

CandyLeBonBon · 09/05/2021 17:34

@Toomuchtrouble4me

I don’t agree that social pressure made her say she wasn’t bothered - she wasn’t bothered! She didn’t HAVE to add ‘because he’s adorable’ she wasn’t bothered. Sometimes things are just what they seem. Agree with first poster - context is everything.
What context would suggest is correct for a man to get his dick out and flop it over your shoulder? I'm intrigued to know what social etiquette that can be applied to make this acceptable?
FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 09/05/2021 17:34

@DeeleysMum I'm basing this solely on my one encounter with JB and his DH but his DH seems to be his glorified assistant. I wondered at the time what the power dynamic in that couple is like.

OwlBeThere · 09/05/2021 17:37

@FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop I don’t disagree with anything you say there. People seem to have read my post as saying I think it’s fine, that’s not what I said, I said IF the other people were ok then it’s ok. But everyone would have to be ok. If they aren’t or even one isn’t then it’s not.
The context matters.

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 09/05/2021 17:37

@lifeissweet god I hate that bloody song. Jackson didn't care much for the children he raped but yeah what about elephants Hmm

Also very ignorant line of 'what about the Africans'...which ones, you deformed nonce.

Cammielou76 · 09/05/2021 17:37

I never have liked John Barrowman, just so full of himself and big-headed. He is so egotistical, I can quite imagine how he invades other people's personal space and thinks it is ok to do so.

It is double-standards as if he were a heterosexual male he would be up in court but because he camps it up and is gay he knows he will get away with it.

guinnessguzzler · 09/05/2021 17:39

Jarvis cocker should BE Doctor Who!

I'm pretty sure he actually is.

anwensmummy · 09/05/2021 17:44

I haven't read the reports but as soon as I saw your post I had to reply - Yep, he is WELL known in the business for this. Knocking on dressing room doors before the show but using his penis to knock, streaking in the corridors backstage, flashing in the wings etc. - all done to both women and men. All stories I have heard over the years from fellow performers (I am a singer and have performed in the West End, not with John Barrowman but friends of mine have) and always it was discussed as though it's the world's most hilarious joke. In the same way that Michael Ball's legendary farting is laughed about and stories passed on.

  • Not wanting to dis Michael Ball, he is wonderful, but there are many stories about him doing really stinky farts onstage during tender love duets etc -

John Barrowman's behaviour should have been called out a long time ago. In this business it's very rare that people do report this kind of thing, there's an unspoken "rule" that it's just part of it. And also people are scared of losing work in a highly competitive and over-crowded field. When I was an inexperienced 22 year old singer just starting out I was appearing in a show opposite a total lech (not JB!) who I couldn't stand, I remember he put his hand into my cleavage backstage, we were in the wings about to come onstage for a love duet and it was horrible, he knew there was nothing I could do as we had to walk onto the stage two seconds later, and it was too dark backstage for anyone to see. I'll never forget having to stand there onstage singing to him, in his embracing arms, as if I was madly in love with him. All I wanted to do was push him off me and run off the stage. But I didn't do anything about it afterwards either as I was worried it would affect my career in the future - he was older, more experienced and had influence. It's a really bad situation. If it happened to me now I would complain, but I am much more confident these days.

FredtheCatsMum · 09/05/2021 17:49

Its a bit odd to suggest it was accepted because he's gay.

Perhaps its worth waiting to hear what, if anything, his co workers have to say about it rather than projecting your own onto them.

flashylamp · 09/05/2021 17:51

@FredtheCatsMum

Its a bit odd to suggest it was accepted because he's gay.

Perhaps its worth waiting to hear what, if anything, his co workers have to say about it rather than projecting your own onto them.

Why on earth does the opinions of his co workers have any relevance here?

Exposing oneself is against the law, no matter what your co workers think.

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 09/05/2021 17:53

@FredtheCatsMum

Its a bit odd to suggest it was accepted because he's gay.

Perhaps its worth waiting to hear what, if anything, his co workers have to say about it rather than projecting your own onto them.

Do we have to have people confirm that it's not OK to get your genitals out and rub them on people in the workplace.

It's relevant that he's gay because he's protected in his abuse of women because people won't think it's sexually motivated

lifeissweet · 09/05/2021 17:54

I have a very silly sense of humour generally, but nothing about indecent exposure is funny.

I can't even work out why it's supposed to be. Is it like 'I am so outrageous?' Or is it more like 'making women uncomfortable and watching their shocked faces is hilarious?'

It's so... weird.

LillianGish · 09/05/2021 17:58

How did he get away with it? For the same reasons that Jimmy Savile and Harvey Weinstein got away with it - because he's a big enough star that people were too scared to rock the boat and call him on it. For fear of being thought a bad sport, for fear of not being hired again - watch the Jonathan Ross interview, it looks like Andrew Lloyd-Webber did try to take a stand against it - but even he and Jonathan Ross and the entire audience are all laughing along about it.

HepzibahGreen · 09/05/2021 18:07

Unfortunately, putting dick on someone's shoulder is a common prank in the entertainment industry.
Confused
Not in my experience..unless by "entertainment industry" you mean male strippers?
I am another veteran of theatre and film industry (although very off and on, over about 20 years) and I agree that the forced intimacy and relaxed attitude to nudity can lead to inappropriate behaviour, but it most certainly never been common for men to put their penises on people for a laugh! At any rate, its never happened to me. My God, the first man to do that to me would be singing falsetto for ever after.
It is just revolting, as well as an aggressive act and should not be tolerated in any industry.

MarshaBradyo · 09/05/2021 18:09

@HepzibahGreen

Unfortunately, putting dick on someone's shoulder is a common prank in the entertainment industry. Confused Not in my experience..unless by "entertainment industry" you mean male strippers? I am another veteran of theatre and film industry (although very off and on, over about 20 years) and I agree that the forced intimacy and relaxed attitude to nudity can lead to inappropriate behaviour, but it most certainly never been common for men to put their penises on people for a laugh! At any rate, its never happened to me. My God, the first man to do that to me would be singing falsetto for ever after. It is just revolting, as well as an aggressive act and should not be tolerated in any industry.
If it is it’s gross and he’s an idiot for doing it on TV and deserves similar to others who have done gross sexually aggressive things.
LovelyIssues · 09/05/2021 18:09

@Pemba "It's obviously not as bad as Noel Clarke" really??!! I think it's much worse and actual sexual misconduct surely?! Noel Clarke is mainly a bit suggestive and a flirt. Completely different.