To think nothing terrible will happen if fat me wears swimming attire on holiday?

[BlowDryRat]

Assuming we're ever allowed on holiday...

I used to be a size 10 but this has crept up to a size 14-16. I do a lot of exercise but eat too much. None of my clothes fit and I feel quite self conscious.

We're off to the beach over the half term and summer holidays and I've been stressing over what sort of cover-up to wear. It then occurred to me to wonder what would actually be so terrible if I just wore a normal swimming costume or tankini (I've never been a bikini person). Will the fish jump out of the sea in fright? Will ladies faint? Will small children run away in terror? Will everyone turn and laugh at my wobbly bits? Probably not.

AIBU in thinking it will be fine, or is there some terrible consequence I haven't thought of yet?

I use a swim dress like this one

www.jdwilliams.co.uk/shop/magisculpt-flatter-me-shaping-swimdress-longer-length/HN202/product/details/show.action?pdBoUid=4010&optionColour=Black&optionSize=10&promo=6202&cm_mmc=GOOGLE--JDWilliams--na-_-PRODUCT_GROUP&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&gclid=CjwKCAjwm7mEBhBsEiwA_of-TD7n5IpOwGy1pGKIWanQ7ZuRdk4hf7EvXr31ndykRo9v2QfS_b0-IBoCykcQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

I feel much more comfortable and less self conscious.

You miss one key point. I since there's a reasonable chance your beach is in the UK, therefore surely you need to be more worried about your long johns, jumpers, blankets, woolly hats. You might be quite glad of a little extra padding in your swimsuit!

@Roominmyhouse

Oh my goodness OP you are massive, you should probably lock yourself away and never be seen in public again.

Or alternatively have a word with yourself and realise many women are a size 14-16 and wear swimwear at that size and no one even gives them a second look. Let’s not pretend someone at that size is huge and would have people staring at them for daring to wear a swimsuit.

I’m a size 14-16, I wear a bikini if I’m on holiday and I look fine.

But it's not just about how you look is it. It's about how you feel. I feel vulnerable in a bikini at a size 14/16. I'm not body confident, I feel like everyone is staring at me (despite the fact I don't notice others the same size or bigger than me). However, I do still wear one abroad as I want to sunbathe in a bikini rather than a one piece. The second I want to stand up to walk anywhere I cover up

Excellent. I'm glad no one else thinks anyone will care either. I think it's because nothing fits well ATM it's making me worry.

No one will notice or care. How to get a bikini body. Buy a bikini and put it on your body.

@stodgystollen

You miss one key point. I since there's a reasonable chance your beach is in the UK, therefore surely you need to be more worried about your long johns, jumpers, blankets, woolly hats. You might be quite glad of a little extra padding in your swimsuit!

I was gonna say, a swimming costume to a beach in the UK? More like thick coats and layers are needed against the cold.

But seriously no one will notice. The ones who do notice are pretty shallow and stupid. Their opinions or thoughts hardly matter.

@ Wearywithteens - the responses so far don’t bear out your dim view of ‘healthy’ types.
It’s fine. Everyone thinks it’s perfectly normal.

@Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies

I’m fat, and swim at the local beach. I have frequently seen children I teach, and their parents, as I wallow in the sea. They may be traumatised by the experience, but I’m absolutely fine.

My DM was a teacher and used to drive to the next town to go swimming rather than risk bumping into children or parents at our local pool.

@stodgystollen

You miss one key point. I since there's a reasonable chance your beach is in the UK, therefore surely you need to be more worried about your long johns, jumpers, blankets, woolly hats. You might be quite glad of a little extra padding in your swimsuit!

Good point that! We're hoping to go abroad, where I'm worried the beaches will be full of bronzed teenagers.

The only side effect will be swimming and enjoying your holiday.

@ThePlantsitter

You're not fat. People won't even look at you anyway. I wear a swimming cozzy to the beach and no-one looks at me and I am fat.

Besides, going to the beach isn't a long bathing beauty contest you're only allowed to show up at if you're thin. It's about swimming and diving sandcastles and doing things, not looking like something in particular.

The OP has said she is fat. How could you possibly know better unless you know here personally?

Honestly OP, go and have a good time. You'll find there'll be people there of all shapes, sizes, ages, ethnicity etc and the one thing they'll all have in common, is that they're having a fantastic time

You're not fat. @ThePlantsitter it’s not supportive though. People will die because of other falling over themselves not to “fat shame”.
Knowing you are fat/obese and need to urgently loose weight for health reasons is a separate issue to being able to wear beachwear.

No. Nothing will happen.
Smile, enjoy yourself. That's what people will see. Treat yourself to something lovely to wear.
Have a super holiday

In a size 20 & wear very high bikini bottoms & bikini top on the beach 🤷🏻‍♀️ My children will remember mum in the sea not her wobbly bits!

I felt the same the last time I was on a beach (ex small 10 now 14) but please rest assured, however fat you feel, there will be other people a lot fatter who evidently don’t give a monkey’s what anyone thinks.

Some of them will very likely even be in bikinis stretched to bursting, so not even a nod to concealing the stomach blubber, and obviously giving zero fucks.

@BlowDryRat - strangely I won’t swim at the local pool precisely for this reason. But when I’m at the beach I just don’t care

I'm the same height and weight as you Op and whilst I need to lose weight (& I'm actively trying to do so), I'm certainly not obese and would happily go to the beach on holiday. I don't judge anyone and don't expect anyone to judge me - if they do, that's on them.

I would say that you should buy clothes that fit properly and you feel good in - if you're trying to squeeze into old clothes that are too small then you will feel self-conscious and fat as you're not dressing to the size you actually are.

I only notice people who are wearing a swim dress and nervously fiddling with it trying to cover themselves up - I want to yell at them "You look fine!"
The last time I went to the pool the best looking woman there was probably a size 20 but she was wearing a gorgeous burgundy and cream 50s style swimming costume and she looked super confident and was having a great time playing with her laughing kids.

I agree @ViolaValentina - confidence is the best thing to wear.

Definitely obese.

I feel the same way @ViolaValentina. I was looking at all sorts of swim dresses, skirts, floaty tops but just thought I'd be drawing more attention to myself.

I’m bigger than you and I have been in my swimming costume plenty of times and seen others a similar size and thought nothing of it.

I did recently purchase swim leggings which are like cycling shorts for swimming which I adore but that’s mostly so I don’t have to maintain hairs on my bikini like and upper thighs!

However they do make me feel more confident in public and I don’t have to worry how I’m sitting etc. I wear them over my swimming costume but could be paired with a tankini or bikini top.

If you have a body and you are at the beach or swimming pool, it's the law that you should wear a swimming costume. If you are a size 14-16 you will be the envy of half the women there, who though fat, or extremely thin, should also be wearing swimming costumes.

I think we all should have had a nanny like the Mitford sisters had: ‘Always remember you are the least important person in the room’ and to Diana before her first wedding: ‘Nobody’s going to be looking at you’

I love swimming and have swum in lots of pools and outdoor places - I have never swum anywhere where I've seen only thin/non-overweight people. There are always people of all shapes, sizes and ages which is how it should be.

Once I was on a beautiful pristine remote scottish beach on a hot sunny day with some other families - I was the only woman who would swim, the others declined and said they wouldn't get their bodies out. Obviously that's totally their own decision and I didn't put pressure on them, but how sad. (The men all jumped in including the overweight ones.)

If you like swimming in the sea/being on the beach in your cossie, do it. Don't miss out!

Nobody will care OP. They'll be thinking something about themselves. People are self absorbed like that when it comes to swimming costumes. Just try and get your bloke to wear a Speedo and you'll see those thoughts in action.

It's been a wanky year, just do what you want.