Perimenopause: why did I not know I’d feel this shit?

[CaptainAwkward]

Christ I’m tired. It feels exactly like the bone deep aching fatigue of my early pregnancies (definitely not up the duff before anyone asks!)

Why isn’t common knowledge how rubbish it can be? Well, it’s obviously the patriarchal medical/social model that dismisses ‘women’s problems’.
I’ve got the GP in a couple of weeks who has my blood results and will hopefully prescribe HRT.

Any tips?

So glad everyone is learning all about this! I just want to add - hrt is not just about ‘getting through hot flushes, symptoms etc’ it protects your bones and heart for later years. So even those who feel they are ‘sailing through it’ need to be aware of what falls oestrogen will be doing to their bodies.

Falling (not falls)

@SpanishGoatFlower

And I’ll add in Frozen Shoulder 😭

Get a steroid injection for that . I persevered for 4 months with physio and did nothing . An injection will free it up and allow you to exercise it .

Instantly!

Thinning eyebrows is definitely a thing.

HRT put a stop to it! I was lucky. My friend (who is 8 years older and also had an early menopause, like me, at 43 ish) has no eyebrows left. She didn't and won't take HRT.

She also has VA and is getting a stooped back. She has consultation after consultation about her gynae problems and will not listen when I suggest she just needs to investigate at least topical HRT. Nobody has suggested it to her.

I started peri at f43/44 ish - I was shocked when my GP suggested that was what was going on!

I was knackered, PMT ish all the time, raging, anxiety through the roof, I ached, bleeding all the time - just a bit but enough to be annoying. Headaches, migraines. No hot flushes but the night sweats were just ridiculous - I was having to change the sheets every night, sometimes twice.

I didn't really go to the doctors till I flooded, on holiday. DH thought I was dying it was that bad. Blood everywhere. It looked like we had slaughtered something in the room. Luckily my sister had had the same thing a few years before and told me about it - I'd never heard of flooding before.

the pill first sorted out stuff for a bit and then I went on HRT which made a huge difference.

But I'd never heard of perimenopause till all this happened....

I saw my OBGYN yesterday and she said that I should stay on progyluton for five years. She said that studies on cancer are skewed because of the old tendency to wait until women are already well into the menopause before treatment but new studies show that very early treatment offers protection. I am so glad it's this simple. That little pill has changed my life completely. My boss complimented me on my recent work today, I fear I am just functioning normally after wading through treacle for a year and he is just seeing me as normal. I am eternally grateful to the pharmaceuticals who apparently are trying to microchip and poison us, they are welcome to my data

This is a really helpful thread.

Re the thinning eyebrows, I have eyebrows like Madonna in her earliest carnation so I would welcome this 🤣

@CaptainAwkward

I’m so happy this thread (which started off as a self-pitying moan) has been so helpful. I’ve learned so much about the peri menopause.

I’m counting down until my GP appointment (6 days!). I’m going to print out the NICE guidelines for prescribing HRT.

Does anyone have a link to the best document?

www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ng23/chapter/Recommendations#diagnosis-of-perimenopause-and-menopause

This is the NICE page, not necessarily the best but at least what GPs should be working to

Meant to add that this can be downloaded, printed and taken to GPs with appropriate parts highlighted. All 31 pages if needed

I have to draw my eyebrows in every morning! I started peri in my 30s and it took ages to get treatment because I was so young that it wasn’t considered at first. So sadly my HRT hasn’t caused my eyebrows to bush up again! Probably doesn’t help that I overplucked in my youth.

Yes, I also need to draw my eyebrows on in the morning. I am not sure if they have become thinner or just gone white

So, either peri menopause makes your eyebrows thin or there are just lots of us with random thinning eyebrows

I do find myself wondering what the provision would look like if it was men who went through the menopause. I very much suspect there would have been significant research leading to clear treatment and support pathways that would be accessible to all. Plus it would actually get talked about.

Don’t know where to start, but what a helpful thread! Peri menopause sucks – there is nothing good about it. Took me ages to realise that all these symptoms – intense itching, bloating, weight gain, worse than ever hay fever and the worse than ever accompanying nose bleeds, not to mention the hot sweats at night, were actually peri menopause.

Reading this thread, I now know that I can add my tiredness and disappearing eyebrows to the list! Been dyeing the eyebrows and read somewhere that Helen Mirren had hers tattooed on when they disappeared so that is also an option. Always had mild psoriasis but the itching is now on a different level along with outbreaks of rashes and raw skin. Lately these have been on my face and scalp which are really annoying. I just manage it as best as I can with lots of moisturiser and unperfumed skin products. Avon have just produced some face creams for peri menopause. For the night sweats, I found switching to 100% cotton clothing and bedding (including mattress and pillow protectors) made a huge difference.
Luckily I don’t have periods though. This is due to me being one of the lucky few who get along well with the mini-pill. I haven’t had HRT, but do use the herbal remedies. I found that Promensil double strength is good but pricey. Sometimes my gums get sore and I use the over-the-counter Corsodyl dental gel which heals it nicely. Can’t drink red wine and fortified wine much now as these seem to trigger the hot flushes along with alcohol in general. I carry a basic folding hand fan in my bag and pre-Covid, found others in the office were using them too. Andrea McLean said she put sanitary towels on the insides of her clothing under her armpits as the studio lights would trigger hot flushes – good idea this. Also agree it should be talked about more whereas our mothers’ generation thought it shouldn’t be mentioned at all. Meg Matthews has done some good work highlighting the need for it to be talked about.

Am I the only one who is actually genuinely upset that no one talks about this and tells us about all this shit that happens? We got to 40 and then bam!! Blindsided with peri symptoms we're left to figure out and learn about on our own?

I'm really quite pissed off about this.

[quote CantGetDecentNickname]Don’t know where to start, but what a helpful thread! Peri menopause sucks – there is nothing good about it. Took me ages to realise that all these symptoms – intense itching, bloating, weight gain, worse than ever hay fever and the worse than ever accompanying nose bleeds, not to mention the hot sweats at night, were actually peri menopause.

Reading this thread, I now know that I can add my tiredness and disappearing eyebrows to the list! Been dyeing the eyebrows and read somewhere that Helen Mirren had hers tattooed on when they disappeared so that is also an option. Always had mild psoriasis but the itching is now on a different level along with outbreaks of rashes and raw skin. Lately these have been on my face and scalp which are really annoying. I just manage it as best as I can with lots of moisturiser and unperfumed skin products. Avon have just produced some face creams for peri menopause. For the night sweats, I found switching to 100% cotton clothing and bedding (including mattress and pillow protectors) made a huge difference.
Luckily I don’t have periods though. This is due to me being one of the lucky few who get along well with the mini-pill. I haven’t had HRT, but do use the herbal remedies. I found that Promensil double strength is good but pricey. Sometimes my gums get sore and I use the over-the-counter Corsodyl dental gel which heals it nicely. Can’t drink red wine and fortified wine much now as these seem to trigger the hot flushes along with alcohol in general. I carry a basic folding hand fan in my bag and pre-Covid, found others in the office were using them too. Andrea McLean said she put sanitary towels on the insides of her clothing under her armpits as the studio lights would trigger hot flushes – good idea this. Also agree it should be talked about more whereas our mothers’ generation thought it shouldn’t be mentioned at all. Meg Matthews has done some good work highlighting the need for it to be talked about.

[/quote] Some women can’t take hrt although there are so many products and variations that even those who are managing cancer can get guidance.

I do worry when women are wearing sanitary pads under their arms to work rather than try hrt though. It’s worth reading books like peri meno power by Maisie hill that goes into a lot of depth about the research around hrt. I hope people read up on it and don’t suffer unnecessarily.

@Toomuchsauce and any others in the evorel sequi - how much are you paying in prescription charges? My pharmacy is charging a double NHS fee because there are two medications within the patches - yet the printed sticker says one medicine. Are they taking me for a ride?

(Also - I have to say I haven’t found it to be the magic bullet that so many people do; a slight easing of hotness at night and a few more nights slept through. Still got the migraines and monthly murderous feelings!)

@SpanishGoatFlower the frozen shoulder sucks and I didn’t realise that it was a peri thing. I had the steroid shot (ye gods it hurt, but sadistic nurse was not exactly gentle with his needlework) and had steroid flare which hurts more than the thing itself but when that wore off it was quite magical.

[quote EuroTrashed]@Toomuchsauce and any others in the evorel sequi - how much are you paying in prescription charges? My pharmacy is charging a double NHS fee because there are two medications within the patches - yet the printed sticker says one medicine. Are they taking me for a ride?

(Also - I have to say I haven’t found it to be the magic bullet that so many people do; a slight easing of hotness at night and a few more nights slept through. Still got the migraines and monthly murderous feelings!)

@SpanishGoatFlower the frozen shoulder sucks and I didn’t realise that it was a peri thing. I had the steroid shot (ye gods it hurt, but sadistic nurse was not exactly gentle with his needlework) and had steroid flare which hurts more than the thing itself but when that wore off it was quite magical.[/quote]
My chemist seems to vary the price too. I pay same for 2 boxes as 3. I was only getting 2 when there were shortages.

No idea what it should cost sorry.

I still feel murderous too but brain fog and sleep dramatic improvements.

@Eurotrashed
@MrsMaizel

My shoulder gave up last June and I had an injection in August which helped tremendously with the pain but I still have very limited movement, although I am lucky that it is my left shoulder and I am right handed. I just hope that unlike my neighbour, I don’t get it later in my other shoulder.

My GP denied this was due to the menopause but if you google you will see that in Japan this condition is known as Fifties Shoulder which says it all.

I used to suffer menstrual migraines before I switched to cerazette and my periods stopped. I'm nearly 47 and my periods are being erratic, I'be been getting more and more headaches and I'm scared my menstrual migraines are returning, is this likely ??

Headaches and migraines can be symptoms of iron deficiency too so get this tested.

Very informative thread - thank you everyone. Just putting all this together...

My worst symptom is rage which is awful then a bit of forgetfulness, erratic periods and flooding, itching, occasional headaches, dry eyes.

Actually the itching is quite bad! Anyone know what hormone changes might cause the itching??!

No joint pain - I take Omega 3 for a joint condition - if I remember!! ...

Thank you all. Been feeling I've gone a bit bonkers recently. I put it down to being cooped up under COVID restrictions, but now I think I'm peri.
I'm annoyed, irritable, trying really hard to keep a lid on my temper, not sleeping well and generally down. It's not nice
I'm 50