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What would you think of a father in this situation? Is it the system or does it reflect more on the man?

132 replies

moralduty · 27/04/2021 14:03

Man pays over £1000 per month for the lease hire of a luxury brand new car and pays a quarter of this for his two children with his ex. This is calculated by the CMS. He doesn't pay towards school uniform or any extras, just the calculated amount. How does this system work? Do they really think that teenagers cost less than £10 a day? Is it fair that a father can spend four times as much a month on his car than his children? I know that some don't give anything at all and that's worse but the system stinks.

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TheLastLotus · 27/04/2021 14:12

Both.
CMS figures are way out of date.
And a decent father would prioritise his kids (many men pay more than CMS).

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Rainbowqueeen · 27/04/2021 14:13

Agreed

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moirarosebabay · 27/04/2021 14:14

I would have a low opinion of the man. I've got an ex like this and he's not a nice person in my opinion.

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DelilahDingleberry · 27/04/2021 14:16

How much does he earn? £250 a month for two children seems pretty low for someone who can afford to pay £1000 a month for a car. Is there a shared care arrangement?

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arethereanyleftatall · 27/04/2021 14:16

I would think the father was shit. Yes, the system is crap.
There was a thread a while ago where a man in America wasn't allowed to go on holiday as he had unpaid child maintenance. We need that system!

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GreyhoundG1rl · 27/04/2021 14:18

The system appears to be vastly off, but the man opting to hide behind it is an arsehole.

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kalikkma · 27/04/2021 14:19

I'd judge the man. CMS is the minimum he should pay. It's clear his priority lies with driving an impressive car rather than supporting his children.

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SarahAndQuack · 27/04/2021 14:20

@GreyhoundG1rl

The system appears to be vastly off, but the man opting to hide behind it is an arsehole.

This.
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moralduty · 27/04/2021 14:22

The cost of the car is something to do with a pension reduction scheme so he hardly pays anything towards his pension. He might regret that in later years.

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JustLyra · 27/04/2021 14:22

It's impossible to say 1--% without more detail, but it's likely he's a dick.

I do know someone who pays an obscene amount for a hobby compared to his child maintenance because CMS doesn't take into account the fact that he has practically zero normal adult living costs because his parents fund him (lives with them rent free, no bills, they buy the food) like he's 8.

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HorridHamble · 27/04/2021 14:27

As a parent in a similar position due to DC’s dad paying himself in dividends instead of salary, I agree that it’s extremely frustrating. There is nothing I can do. We have an informal agreement because he would pay even less via CMS. The system is flawed. I count my lucky stars I didn’t sacrifice my career as he suggested, and I am able to provide for the children myself, but it’s not the point.

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HorridHamble · 27/04/2021 14:33

I should add that it speaks volumes about his priorities and parental responsibility.

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Whatisthisfuckery · 27/04/2021 14:34

I’d think the man is a total twat. Just because the CM system is shit and the calculations way out, doesn’t mean he is unable to pay more. Still, knowing exactly who somebody is so you can believe them is always useful.

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Waxonwaxoff0 · 27/04/2021 14:34

I judge both but mostly the man. Myself and my ex husband do not go through CMS, he pays me straight to my bank account a higher amount than the CMS calculations. Any decent NRP would do the same.

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GilbertsLuckySocks · 27/04/2021 14:45

What does a teenager spend £10 a day on?

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moralduty · 27/04/2021 14:47

Well, maintenance covers a share of rent, utilities, clothing, footwear, food...

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GilbertsLuckySocks · 27/04/2021 14:49

@moralduty do you receive child benefit and child tax credit for your teenager too? (Approx £300 a month)

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FetchezLaVache · 27/04/2021 14:52

@GilbertsLuckySocks

What does a teenager spend £10 a day on?

Child maintenance isn't spending money for the children, it's the NRP's contribution towards the costs incurred by the RP for feeding, clothing and housing them. And in this case, the RP is getting less than a tenner a day for two teenagers. HTH.
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CarrieBlue · 27/04/2021 15:01

@GilbertsLuckySocks

What does a teenager spend £10 a day on?

Breakfast - £1
School dinner - £2.50
Tea - £1.50

So for two kids, there’s your £10.

Everything else - clothes, transport, utilities, roof, hobbies etc will be far more expensive and down to the rp. HTH
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FoxyTheFox · 27/04/2021 15:28

Both are at fault, the CMS isn't fit for purpose and the man is a dick for not providing proper support to his children.

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YoniAndGuy · 27/04/2021 15:29

Utter bellend and a shit dad, but take heart from the fact that most people seeing him drive around in his twatmobile will think exactly that!

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SmokedDuck · 27/04/2021 15:32

With no information I'd suspect he was an ass, but I would not really speculate too much.

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TheLastLotus · 27/04/2021 15:32

@YoniAndGuy twatmobile 😂

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swimlittlefishy · 27/04/2021 15:34

@GilbertsLuckySocks

What does a teenager spend £10 a day on?

The stupid question of the day award goes to.....
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AerisAsh · 27/04/2021 15:35

@GilbertsLuckySocks

Are you suggesting that a NRP should not have to pay if the RP gets these benefits

I don't think it should matter how much money the RP earns or has, the NRP should still be paying.

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