To ask is there a better version of Brighton

[Wondergirl100]

Sorry a bit cheeky to put on AIBU - but - it's an important question!!

Brighton - great vibes, creativity, open mindedness good schools - but overpriced and the countryside isn't amazing and there are no gardens.

So what is the alternative! Where else is open minded and fun and has sea air and countryside but is not ruined by hen dos and property prices. And needs to have good schools.

Sadly, I have to write off the whole of Kent as I don't approve of grammar system. Unless there is somewhere in Kent with good secondary moderns.

OP what do you think of the replies?

You seem to have lit the blue touch paper and run!

I love Brighton but it does have a grimey side - much like any city.

Similar vibes maybe St Leonard's, Deal, Whitstable? But I guess not if you've ruled out Kent because of the grammar system.

I'm assuming you're talking about south east England if moving from London, and hoping for similarly good weather. So Essex, Kent or Sussex presumably. Not morecambe 😆 or Birmingham (sea air??).

Why include Tunbridge Wells though? Which is nothing like Brighton and far more conservative, though extremely pretty? And in the heart of Kent?!

Another fan of the South Downs here, I truly think it's some of the most beautiful countryside in the uk. But I'm not a fan of dramatic landscapes or mountains. The seven sisters walk is just breathtaking.

Also Lewes is not remotely suburban at all. Have you ever been to some of these places?

No need for the anti-London hate on this thread surely? So tedious.

House prices in Hebden have gone nuts in recent years, but still cheaper than Brighton. And you can get loads for your money in Mytholmroyd (next village down the valley; only a mile or two from the centre of Hebden)

@Erkrie

Are you really saying you think it's ok to be nasty to someone so long as they belong to a different community to you, just because you don't feel you'd be welcomed somewhere and they might?

No I'm not saying that at all. Read what's on the page, rather than what you think is on the page. I'm simply pointing out that Brighton isn't as open minded as one may first believe. Thus it's worth considering this.

Gosh you sound a delight. Maybe people aren't 'welcoming' to you because of the way you treat others.

You don't sound very open-minded and welcoming yourself. In fact you just sound rude. Do you happen to live in Brighton by any chance?

I did read, thanks. I said I thought it wasn't ok to pick on someone for worrying about people's attitudes; you disagreed. If you meant to say 'Brighton isn't as open minded as one might first believe,' then perhaps you should have just said it? Because it sounded very much as if you and others on the thread were trying to make a covert point about hierarchies of people who're entitled to feel concerned about discrimination.

And no, I don't live anywhere near Brighton. Sorry.

The surrounding countryside is beautiful, IMO, and I like the arty vibe in Brighton: always love a good shop in North Laine. But I also agree with the numerous comments made that this area isn't necessarily as 'open minded' as it might appear on the surface. Plus homelessness is a huge problem and property prices are exorbitant.

Bournemouth has a better beach: all sand and no shingle. If you're willing to go further west Torquay and especially Newquay have a not dissimilar vibe.

I’ve never understood the hype about Brighton and have always thought it was rather skanky and druggie. If I could I’d go west as like the relaxed pace of life there Bristol is a lovely city but that’s not an option for us.

🤣 oh my god, Bristol is no better than Brighton. I’ve never seen so many homeless people/ beggars outside London! Some bits are really grotty and intimidating and I had the misfortune of turning a corner and seeing someone injecting themselves right in the street (and he wasn’t a diabetic!) I’m not saying Brighton doesn’t have its issues but to fuss Brighton in favour of Bristol is just lol!

Diss*

Well, I guess we read it differently, and I'm sure she's capable of replying all by herself if I've misunderstood

Did you just misgender me? ☹️

Oooh I quite fancy Belfast.

@lidoshuffle and those others saying the South Downs is amazing; when you’re from Scotland and Northern Ireland where my husband and I, respectively, are from, it’s average countryside really. Pretty enough - not spectacular by any stretch.

A few years in Lincolnshire would soon put you straight!

I did read, thanks. I said I thought it wasn't ok to pick on someone for worrying about people's attitudes; you disagreed

I wasn't picking on them. But you are still rude. Hope this helps.

OP - does it need to have the size of Brighton or just the type of people/artsy-ness?

@Erkrie

Well, I guess we read it differently, and I'm sure she's capable of replying all by herself if I've misunderstood

Did you just misgender me? ☹️

I apologise; there are lots of women on this site, and frankly I can't see it does anyone any harm to challenge the he-as-default you get everywhere else.

Eastbourne? Beautiful countryside surrounding it too at Beachy Head/Burling Gap . . .

OMG Torquay is NOTHING like Brighton!
Have people actually ever been to these places? I was in Devon on holiday last year in Torquay and I really didn't think 'yup, this is just like being in Brighton' just because its by the sea! Totnes has a similar vibe but Torquay really doesn't, nor Bournemouth for that matter!

"But there's a bloke that dresses like a big furry dog every day"

Yeah, I'll stick with Morecambe I think.

@SarahAndQuack
I've read Erkrie's posts and I think you have completely misinterpreted their posts. Erkrie was just making the point I made previously. I didn't read Erkrie in any way being nasty about OP for wanting to live somewhere 'open-minded' . They were just making the point that I made; that many self-styled 'open-minded' limit their tolerance to people they already agree with/ feel well-disposed towards.

Totnes suggested by pp really is very small and very white and very quiet. Surrounded by great countryside but not much going on. Heck if I was moving from eg Canterbury I’d find it v small and quiet.

Ithinkyoucan absolutely this.

[quote Ithinkyoucan]@SarahAndQuack
I've read Erkrie's posts and I think you have completely misinterpreted their posts. Erkrie was just making the point I made previously. I didn't read Erkrie in any way being nasty about OP for wanting to live somewhere 'open-minded' . They were just making the point that I made; that many self-styled 'open-minded' limit their tolerance to people they already agree with/ feel well-disposed towards.[/quote]
I think you've missed my first post, though.

It was me who said it was nasty to have a go at the OP for having concerns about discrimination. I didn't refer to Erkrie or anyone else by name, I just said that. Erkrie then responded to that saying no, it depended on what community the OP identified with.

IMO it doesn't depend. It's not ok to mock someone for having worries about discrimination. Even if you personally don't share their concerns, or have concerns of your own. It's such a dickish thing to do.

I get that it's absolutely the case some people think they're open minded and are actually quite intolerant; sure.

[quote Ithinkyoucan]@SarahAndQuack
I've read Erkrie's posts and I think you have completely misinterpreted their posts. Erkrie was just making the point I made previously. I didn't read Erkrie in any way being nasty about OP for wanting to live somewhere 'open-minded' . They were just making the point that I made; that many self-styled 'open-minded' limit their tolerance to people they already agree with/ feel well-disposed towards.[/quote]
It isn't the first time, actually. There's some serious form there...

Yes, I fancy Belfast too! Have never visited but it is very high on my list of places to go for a long weekend. The posts on this thread about Belfast have really strengthened that desire!

I live near Brighton and very rarely visit. Mainly because I don’t like crowds and Brighton is almost always busy, even in the winter, even midweek. I like a bit more peace and quiet and being able to find space at a table outside a cafe or pub when the sun is out.

The South Downs are gorgeous! I am a fan of mountains and dramatic landscapes so I love the Scottish Highlands and the French/Swiss Alps for that reason. The South Downs don’t have that breathtaking drama, but I love them nonetheless. There are some great views of the sea and the wind farm up there. Sometimes I can see all the way along from the Seven Sisters over to the Isle of Wight. I’ve been in this area most of my life so this landscape definitely feels like home and I couldn’t imagine living inland.

.

What does "artsy" actually mean, anyway??
Art galleries everywhere?
Montmartre-esque?
People in those tie-dye trousers?
Theatres? Comedy shows? Live music?
I've never really got it...

Totnes suggested by pp really is very small and very white and very quiet

Most of the UK is "very white" though, apart from a small number of areas which aren't.