Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To only serve vegan food at my wedding.

999 replies

inthewest · 23/04/2021 21:44

My partner and myself are both vegan. We want to serve an only vegan menu from an excellent vegan caterer. I know people aren't a fan of "fake meat" and we've deliberately chosen to not have anything of that sort. Our menu will include many options and will cater to allergies and dietary needs such as celiac. The food is delicious, is very "us" and reflects us as couple.

We have had pushback from my partners family. Adult family. I'm fully prepared to cater for children but not adults. Our thinking is that it's one meal.

OP posts:
PumpingPamela · 23/04/2021 21:51

Oh god I have no idea what happened there - sorry!

titchy · 23/04/2021 21:51

@littlepattilou

As long as you are OK with going to someone's wedding, or party, or 'evening meal' and only being offered dairy and meat products, then yeah, go ahead and only offer vegan food at your wedding.

If you would not accept dairy or meat products in the food you were offered, then of COURSE you are being unreasonable to only offer vegan food to the guests at your wedding.

I can't believe you even have to ask! Confused

Eh? Given that there are other food groups other than meat and dairy that doesn't even make sense. I'm sure op wouldn't insist someone didn't have a meat course at their wedding - presumable they'd just eat the pasta/spuds/veg on offer.
PuppyMonkey · 23/04/2021 21:51

What do you mean about fully prepared to cater for children but not adults? Grin

Well anyway the parents can eat the kids chicken nuggets.Grin

I say do what you want, OP, it’s your wedding and it’s all a load of silly bollocks anyway at the end of the day.

Solasum · 23/04/2021 21:51

As an committed carnivore, I would have no problem with a special wedding meal being vegetarian, but if I knew it was vegan I wouldn’t be looking forward to it at all. I have tried various vegan recipes, but I just can’t find the same enjoyment in vegan food. Pulses especially.

cardibach · 23/04/2021 21:52

@littlepattilou

As long as you are OK with going to someone's wedding, or party, or 'evening meal' and only being offered dairy and meat products, then yeah, go ahead and only offer vegan food at your wedding.

If you would not accept dairy or meat products in the food you were offered, then of COURSE you are being unreasonable to only offer vegan food to the guests at your wedding.

I can't believe you even have to ask! Confused

This is nonsense. A meat eater can quite easily eat one vegan meal. A vegan/vegetarian can’t eat one meat meal in the same way.

I can’t believe you even think it’s the same.

Livpool · 23/04/2021 21:52

I eat meat and this wouldn't bother me at all. It's your wedding so do what suits you. Unless you feed me mushrooms
🤢

KihoBebiluPute · 23/04/2021 21:52

Of course yanbu. No one reasonable would expect vegans to arrange for meat to be supplied for others to eat. Veganism isn't a matter of tastes or preferences but an ethical position. Anyone who isn't prepared to eat a vegan meal really doesn't need to come. Those who love and respect you will be fine to go along with ensuring that you get a wedding day that fits with your deeply held beliefs.

Peasbewithyou · 23/04/2021 21:52

Definitely just go for it. I can’t understand why people are making such a fuss about it. It’s not “weird” food, it’s just normal food that happens not to contain animal products! It’s slightly concerning that people can’t imagine going for one day without meat or dairy!

Hope you have a lovely wedding OP!

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 23/04/2021 21:53

Yes agree re no mushrooms.

Also no one likes stuffed peppers. Other than that you're good to go Grin

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 23/04/2021 21:53

littlepattilou Don’t be so hysterical. It’s bloody vegetables.

WhatWouldPhyllisCraneDo · 23/04/2021 21:54

@littlepattilou

As long as you are OK with going to someone's wedding, or party, or 'evening meal' and only being offered dairy and meat products, then yeah, go ahead and only offer vegan food at your wedding.

If you would not accept dairy or meat products in the food you were offered, then of COURSE you are being unreasonable to only offer vegan food to the guests at your wedding.

I can't believe you even have to ask! Confused

It's not the same thing. Only idiots like my ex make this comparison.
mummysharkk · 23/04/2021 21:54

I went to a big party and the hosts were vegan. They put on vegan and non vegan food and the vegan food was amazing and most people preferred it!

I'd go for it.

PuppyMonkey · 23/04/2021 21:54

Intrigued about Pumping Pamela’s post now. Confused

littlepattilou · 23/04/2021 21:54

In typical mumsnet fashion, meat eaters have to bend over backwards to accommodate vegans, but vegans NEVER have to do ANYTHING to accommodate meat eaters.

This never happens in real life. NEVER.

Felty · 23/04/2021 21:54

Ooh I’d love this. I’ve had enough dry chicken breasts at weddings to last me a lifetime.

TokenGinger · 23/04/2021 21:54

@littlepattilou

As long as you are OK with going to someone's wedding, or party, or 'evening meal' and only being offered dairy and meat products, then yeah, go ahead and only offer vegan food at your wedding.

If you would not accept dairy or meat products in the food you were offered, then of COURSE you are being unreasonable to only offer vegan food to the guests at your wedding.

I can't believe you even have to ask! Confused

It's not really the same though, is it? I eat meat, but it causes me no harm and doesn't go against my ethics to eat a vegan meal. The opposite way around does cause emotional harm and forces somebody to go without a meal or to go against their ethics and life choices. What a bizarre response 🥴
mummabubs · 23/04/2021 21:55

My cousin's wedding was vegan food, I found it really interesting to try some new food combos and also I liked that the day reflected them. I say go for it!

PurpleDaisies · 23/04/2021 21:55

@littlepattilou

In typical mumsnet fashion, meat eaters have to bend over backwards to accommodate vegans, but vegans NEVER have to do ANYTHING to accommodate meat eaters.

This never happens in real life. NEVER.

Meat eaters don’t exclusively eat meat.
Hiphopopotamus · 23/04/2021 21:55

@littlepattilou

As long as you are OK with going to someone's wedding, or party, or 'evening meal' and only being offered dairy and meat products, then yeah, go ahead and only offer vegan food at your wedding.

If you would not accept dairy or meat products in the food you were offered, then of COURSE you are being unreasonable to only offer vegan food to the guests at your wedding.

I can't believe you even have to ask! Confused

GrinGrin so have you never eaten a bag of chips on their own? Or an apple as a snack? Or a breakfast of toast and peanut butter?

Idiot

WhatWouldPhyllisCraneDo · 23/04/2021 21:55

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows

Yes agree re no mushrooms.

Also no one likes stuffed peppers. Other than that you're good to go Grin

I love stuffed peppers Shock

OP univite the family and I'll come. Especially if there are mushrooms Grin

lljkk · 23/04/2021 21:55

MN has had this thread before

I don't recall knowing anything about the wedding menu in advance for any wedding I attended. Except my own when we chose the food. Is that common - that people know what the wedding buffet food theme/type will be in advance?

Cannotgarden · 23/04/2021 21:56

As long as the food isn't soya based

Kerberos · 23/04/2021 21:56

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all. It's one meal and it's your wedding.

Just don't make it all about the food. Make it about the wedding. It's not a vegan wedding, just a wedding with food afterwards.

Crankley · 23/04/2021 21:58

I don't eat most of what makes food vegan so would probably suggest to you I would be happy to attend the evening part of your wedding as I wouldn't want you to waste money on food that won't be eaten by me..

Foolintherain · 23/04/2021 21:58

I'd be straight to McDonalds on the way home. But you do what suits you.