AIBU to be mega pissed off with DS nursery???

[user1468829213]

Opinions please...my 13 month old has been absolutely fine this week apart from teething so a bit more clingy than usual. No raised temperature or illness. He went to nursery as usual Wednesday & was absolutely fine when I dropped him off, nursery updated the app to say he’s fine eating normally etc. Then at about 2 they call to say he woke up from his nap hot so they did his temp & 39.5 so we need to collect him as so high but till we get there they gave him some calpol. DH went to collect him 30 mins later & he said he seemed fine, got him home did temp & 36, put him down for a nap & temp still 36 when he wakes up & happily eating Easter egg on sofa!
Nursery told my DH because of his temp he needs a negative covid test before coming back...bit extreme I think with his temp rise seemingly lasting less than an hour but fair enough rules are rules. Do him a lateral flow test as we have these in the house & negative...send this off to nursery to which I get a message saying it needs to be a PCR test.
At this I ring the nursery to tell them DS is absolutely fine & I’m not putting him through another PCR test unnecessarily. Their response was if he doesn’t have a test he will need to isolate for 10 day’s as he has ‘covid symptoms’. I tell her surely a fluke temp rise of less than an hour isn’t covid & definitely teething especially as it went down straight after having calpol. She sees my point so rings the director but she again won’t back down & says it’s ‘government guidelines’ & he can’t come back without having a negative PCR test.
Since I was backed into a corner we took him for the test yesterday morning even though yet again he has been ABSOLUTELY FINE & I have myself seen no evidence of a high temperature or illness & are taking their word for it he had a temp of 39.5.
The thing that really makes me angry is their ‘Covid terms & conditions’ means we still have to pay them for his sessions thurs & today un till we get the negative result back...husband works in professional cricket & has had to miss the first game of the season too so not good.
AIBU to be mega pissed at nursery, It all seems so unfair for such a sudden rise & fall in temperature that I never saw evidence of myself??

@Rukaya

The nursery is following Government rules that we have all been told must apply to children displaying Covid-19 symptoms

The child is NOT displaying any Covid symptoms though. No idea why so many people think this is ok.

The child did display covid symptoms which is exactly why a test is necessary. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a 13 month old having a simple swab test carried out on them, it is quick and painless. It will be just as much fuss to do the swab than keep them still enough to give them medicine for a temperature anyway. No need for your dramatics over what a broken world it is for a simple swab test which will keep everyone else in the nursery and their families safer.

No need for your dramatics over what a broken world it is for a simple swab test which will keep everyone else in the nursery and their families safer

That wasn't me. Check out who you are replying to before you post

That is so so annoying! My daughter had a raised temp every time she cut a tooth, it’s a thing.

I don’t think you can blame the nursery though, what else can they do? They can’t make a judgement between what’s a covid temp and what’s a teething temp, no one can, all they can do is follow the guidelines, which they did.

The issue is, who pays for this annoying problem? You, or the nursery? If they rent the building and pay staff etc they’d quickly go bankrupt if they give discounts to parents every time a child has a temp/cough.

So it falls on you to pay, which isn’t fair either, except in the sense that you chose to send him to nursery knowing that there’s a pandemic on and that he would sometimes be sent home with temperatures, and you should have known the nursery policy on fees / lateral flow vs pcr test already. (I wouldn’t give a pcr test to a toddler who’s asymptomatic either).

So yabu to be annoyed with the nursery but yanbu to be pissed off that covid is costing you money, it’s cost us all a lot of £. The pandemic sucks.

That said if they never told you that they’d insist ona pcr test then yanbu - but I think they’re just following the guidelines I’ve heard this is a problem in schools too.

If you had done the correct test you would have had the results back quicker and he wouldn't have been subjected to having the swabs done twice. It is very clear that LFTs are not to be used with symptoms and as nursery said he had symptoms they obviously weren't going to accept an LFT result.

@Viviennemary

I'd be annoyed too. Look for another nursery. The more nurseries and childminders get away with unreasonable behaviour the more they will exploit people with their unfair terms.

Fucking hell!! Seriously?? Do you really think nurseries and childminders are just following the gov guidelines just to piss off parents. Imagine if they just allowed people to carry on sending their kids with symptoms and one in 100 were positive. How many more cases would that create and disruption with all having to isolate or would that also be unfair?

A temp is a temp. They don't know if was a spike - how do they know you didn't give him calpol before he was sent it and it was raised because it had worn off?

You're right to be annoyed and inconvienced, but these are the risks we take when we send our children into childcare. My son's had to isolate for 10 days 3 times since nurseries went back (only 1 occasion he had symptoms, the rest it was someone in his bubble) but we've just had to roll with it.

No its the charging fees I'd object to. Not to mention the inconvenience.,

Our paediatrician said teething won't cause a temperature, contrary to popular belief. More likely a virus lingering, even if you LO has bounced back quickly

Thanks for the replies…I didn’t expect such a backlash to be honest! My son only started nursery a few weeks ago so I am still building my trust with them and them asking on more than one occasion if I can keep my son off to as they are understaffed hasn’t helped…

Please do not judge my naivety for me having a ‘sense of entitlement’…The main reason for the post was to see if other nurseries have the same policy - I honestly do not feel entitled to be treated ANY differently to other parents. I also did not think calpol worked on covid temp, and also had no idea a short spike in temp could be a symptom or that a lateral flow test isn’t suitable once symptoms are showing so thanks for those rational posters that have explained that and now I understand they were completely reasonable to keep him off. You live and you learn I suppose.

We have had a negative covid result now so life can resume…sorry if I have offended anyone.

“ Just for those who work in nurseries or have children in one is it also normal practice that a parent should still have to pay for the sessions he/she misses whilst waiting for the negative result? I was hoping it would come this morning so he could go in but nothing yet so looks like he’s missing 2 x days which stings the bank balance a lot!”

I don’t charge while a child is isolating because I see it as the Government not allowing the child to attend rather than the parent keeping the child off. We’re trying to keep infections to a minimum.
I am a childminder, though. I would charge, as normal, if the child tested positive. I will also need to review my policy if the Government support changes.
I think most settlings do charge: some in full, some half fee. Yours should have told you their policy.
It does sound to me as though you don’t trust your nursery.

Ah - cross post!

That explains the reason for your mistrust. Actually, it would reassure me that they are not inventing a temperature: it sounds as though they are telling you the true reason when they ask you to keep your child off for staffing reasons.

@Viviennemary

No its the charging fees I'd object to. Not to mention the inconvenience.,

Why wouldn't they charge fees tho? It's perfectly standard to charge a fee if a child is poorly. The nursery is still open and child's space is still there. They would struggle to operate if parents didn't pay their monthly fees. It's a hard enough industry to stay afloat in anyway without refunding families every day (there will be children absent for differing reasons each day so that's a massive dent in the already short running costs)

YABU I'm afraid. No-one's temp reaches 39.5 because of teething! Something caused that.

I get that it's frustrating - I was in the same situation a few months ago but this is completely reasonable.

When DD has had a temp and we've had to isolate pending results we've paid as normal, it wasn't there fault she wasn't in. When someone in her bubble was positive and they were closed to her group for 10 days we paid half. As others have said the cost of staff etc is the same regardless of whether or not your child is physically there, they still have a space for them. You have my sympathy swabbing a toddler though DD has had 4 tests since last summer, not a fun process!

YANBU to be pissed off about the faff of it all but unreasonable to be pissed off at the nursery.

Imagine the alternative post, that you all had to isolate because they let a child back despite them having had a temperature and there is now an outbreak at the nursery.

I do sympathise as I totally understand how hard and stressful it can be as a working parent especially if you don't have any other child care support. In the early weeks/months of starting nursery, it's quite common for children to be off sick pretty regularly as their immune systems get used to all the different germs/bugs/viruses.

I work in the baby in it of a nursery and if a child has a temperature they are sent home and not allowed back in for 48hrs as well as parents being required to email in a negative covid test for the child. Once we have phoned the parents to collect, we temperature check every 10 minutes and document it and that record is then given to the parent along with the details of any Calpol given. My children got temperatures every time they got a tooth through so they would have been off a lot.

However if we did have a positive covid test at the nursery then that "bubble" would shut and parents would be required to keep their children home and the staff would get SSP so sending children home for 48hrs is definitely better!

Whilst I don't think the nursery are being unreasonable, it's worth noting that some childminders/nurseries will record or take a picture of the thermometer when they take your child's temperature. I think this is probably a good idea. You could suggest that your nursery do this also in future (I would probably do this through anonymous feedback if I were you though because they will obviously find the lack of trust insulting).

I do agree that it wasn't very sensible of them to take the temp right after a nap - especially if your child was wrapped up in blankets. It would have been more sensible, if they had concerns, to isolate the child for 10 minutes, then take the temperature.

Sorry, but I don't think you're gonna get many people in your side here. It is what it is - they're following the guidelines which are in the best interests of everyone. Blame Covid, not the nursery! Incidentally, most of the nursery workers will probably still be unvaccinated at the moment & have families of their own that they obviously need to protect.

The staffing issues may well be down to staff needing to test for covid or being identified as a close contact. Understaffing is an issue for lots of workplaces at the moment.

Understand your frustration but best to be over cautious and they need one rule for all.

My son had a cough. Then a negative PCR. Went to nursery and because they had a positive test they asked me to do another PCR. I did. I knew he was negative but I understood. Drive me mad that the results never came through and we had to isolate and do another PCR which was hell.

YABU, our nursery does the same. Annoying but necessary; if another child at the nursery had a temp wouldn't you went to know they had been tested and your child wasn't being exposed to unnecessary risk?

Did you ever think that maybe they’ve not been able to staff rooms properly because their staff members are having to isolate whilst waiting for test results? Maybe they live with NHS workers or retail workers and that’s why it’s so last minute. I highly doubt they run a successful nursery by asking parents to keep kids at home all the time.

“it's worth noting that some childminders/nurseries will record or take a picture of the thermometer when they take your child's temperature. I think this is probably a good idea.“

I once had a parent who refused to believe that his child had diarrhoea. For the future, he insisted, I had to provide evidence for him.
He soon changed his mind!

@hamblebamble picture of a thermometer? why would a nursery single out a child and lie to the parents that they have a temp, good grief.

I feel like Covid has really bought out the worst in some very petty people.

Covid just seems to be an excuse to make people's already difficult lives more complicated at the moment.