@LavenderLollies I don’t think I put it as succinctly as @OolieMacdoolie put it, my apologies. The thread was started because OP and many others since have expressed that they found pressure to FF when they explicitly said they wanted to or were BFing.
I’ve done both BF and FF, I don’t have strong views on it, but you saying that I do because I’m pointing out biology* is, again, a highlight of the times. I switched when I wanted to and didn’t feel bad. I feel awful for women who do regardless of which way they choose to feed their children.
A woman who is breastfeeding and then subsequently asking for support if required and being insistent on continuing breastfeeding isn’t some hippy/selfish/goal orientated thing to do(that’s not what I’ve interpreted from your posts I mean from others I’ve read/heard).. it’s just how we have even able to develop as a species in various location across the globe.
IMO it doesn’t matter why a woman will choose to FF at the beginning middle or end, if that choice has been made then cool, none of mine or anybody else business AT ALL. But what I do care about is the fierce denial of biology and science. Formula isn’t the only tool I use as an adult, I could get my own calcium from leafy greens but I don’t I use milk products (damn cheese is just godly). I could have got lung/mouth cancer from when I smoked, I still did it for a few years. I have my DC a chicken nugget the other day, whaaaat, USA FDA says that’s a class 1 carcinogen.. I still gave it knowing that and will again too.
Im not comparing formula to those activities I’m just highlighting that as humans we do lots of things we know isn’t optimum for us** but the convenience/pleasure/medicine wins. I can’t fathom a reason why these threads and the topic in general creates such an enormous fierce divide like the alternative is the enemy, I’m the same mother now I FF that I was when I BF’d and when I pumped and when I gave a dummy and when I gave solids. At every single turn I was told to switch to formula when it wasn’t necessary, my child wasn’t starving. It’s as if you choose to BF you’re some kind of martyr that looks down your nose at everyone, I’m sure some do, like all walks of life but none I’ve met.
The poster earlier on lots of pages back who said ‘one bottle of formula milk changes the gut flora’ which isn’t a positive or negative statement, that didn’t stop cries of ‘you’re making me feel guilty’ ‘that makes me feel shit’ ‘where’s the science to back up damage of one bottle of formula’ which are not only not what the poster said or inferred they’re totally personal feelings that have come from somewhere other than that poster sharing a neutral piece of information.
A thread a while back from a new mum with a baby in nicu asking for help increasing supply whilst she awaited the infant feeding specialist at the hospital explained the hospital had offered donor breast milk, cue comments saying it was ‘disgusting they’re offering you that because it’s just putting extra pressure on you’. Why do these people perceive donor breast milk as more triggering than donor cow milk? How have we got there? A healthy baby is at the absolute top of every new parents wants (I hope).
My own fathers face when I mentioned I would be trying to supply some milk for the donor bank when I’ve established BF with DC2 was nothing short of a picture, literally turned his nose up in front of my face. What message does all this give to mothers who want to use human milk to feed their babies?
I totally agree with pretty much everything you’ve said, when I’ve spent time on Facebook groups for BF some of the information can be questionable, I don’t think some of their responses are great. I asked for advice once because I’d stopped pumping as much, DC hadn’t gained barely any weight in a fortnight, he seemed ‘dry’ for want of a better word but nappy output was fine. Do you know what the peer supported said(?): ‘pumping has no reflection on your supply’. I knew that, but that’s why I’d included the lack of weight gain and other things in my post. Nevertheless they trotted out a useless piece of information that if I’d have just blindly listened to it we may have been in the situation lots of women find themselves in.
Breast is best message is ok as a general campaign but certainly not as part of individual antenatal care, that simply has to be based on each woman’s circumstances.
Anyway I’m getting too invested, I’ve just seen a lot of comments about how I choose to use my tits for their actual purpose on MN and it grinds my gears but I’ll probably stay off them moving forward.
*I’m aware that some women’s breasts can’t make enough/any, however those numbers are minuscule in comparison. Or so I’m led to believe by the relevant departments.
**again, I’m aware that FF is in fact optimum if there is a medical reason mum is unable to BF whether that be physically or mentally.