Friends Kids Ruined couch and cushions

[CatherineJHealy]

My friend came over the other day with their child (as they wanted to leave their place for a while due to estate agents coming over). It was all fine, but the child dropped food all over my white rug. (I said we should eat in the kitchen/dining area - but the child shouted at his father that he wanted to eat on the couch in my living room!) Dropping the food over the white rug wasn’t really a problem as it wasn’t ‘wet’ food. The parents then gave him an Easter egg that they pulled out from their bag. The child had it in his hands and was almost sucking on it etc… basically the chocolate had melted down/all over his hands. He then wiped his hands over my couch and on my suede cushions. I’ve not been able to remove the stains. At the time I used tissues - handed them to the parents and child - and in fairness; they told their child to use the tissues whilst he was eating food - but obviously it didn’t work. Am I being precious?! The suede cushion is ruined and the chocolate is now ‘embedded’ into the couch. I’ve tried to clean twice now and the fibres of the couch are coming loose. I don’t want to keep hacking away at it. Do I say anything to the parents or just leave it? Please don’t be cruel - just genuinely annoyed - but know it’s not the end of the world. Thing is; they are good friends so I don’t want to fall out with them.

Try the spray elbow grease it's a £1 from most shops that got biro and orange based stains out from mine when the kids went a bit wild drawing one day on it.

I don't think the OP actually said that her sofa is white.

[quote Cogfarm]@BrumBoo - yes I have said several times how jealous I am of a pristine, virginal, pure white sofa enshrined in a halo of light. And that I’d keep my children at the furthest point away possible.[/quote]
No, you're bemoaning feeling like you have to keep an extra eye on your children when in a living arrangement like the op has, and wishing such places were more child-friendly/asking who 'needs' a white sofa. There are many places children visit where they have to be taught to be mindful and respectful of their environment, this is no different.

Or the pink stuff but use it in an area that's out of sight just incase it makes it worse or suede cleaner they use for ugg boots ?

@BrumBoo

What do you expect the parents to do? It's your home, you should have been firm - either eat at the table or wait until you leave. Too late now and sadly nothing to be done about it.

I would expect the parents to offer to have the suite professionally cleaned

I'd tell them what the result is, but don't expect anything in return.
In future in your home people do as you say. Don't want to eat in the correct place then do without.

"Dear Friend, as you know out sofa was quite badly marked when you brought little Johnny around last week. Ive tried in vain to get the marks out but it need to be professionally cleaned. That isnt going to be cheap. The estimate is £££. So we need to have a talk about that, and how its going to be paid for."

I would expect the parents to offer to have the suite professionally cleaned

@HalzTangz, again of course the parents should have offered. No one is denying that. The issue is they didn't offer and the op doesn't want to fall out with them. That leaves very few options in terms of where to go next. Asking them to pay is more likely to end in an argument or awkward friendship than not. Again, it's not about what is obvious when the op doesn't want to muddy waters.

I know! What if they did it ON PURPOSE. They saw that white sofa, were so jealous - and thought ‘DESTROY’!!!!

The parents sound very weak, most of us would be on best behaviour ourselves in someone else’s home.

I’d be pissed off too. Try and get it cleaned, nice friends would pay for this but I suspect they are not nice people.

@Cogfarm,
Or at least - I’d put children as a priority above white sofas.

So OP should make her home completely child friendly just in case friends with children come round?

@BrumBoo what’s more important - to be mindful and respectful to a child’s environment - or to be mindful and respectful to an adult’s environment?

“I’ve tried to clean up the chocolate and mess your child made, but it’s not coming out. I’ll be getting it professionally cleaned and I’ll let you know how much it is”

Fuckers.

@Cogfarm

So to me - a white sofa v’s a play tunnel with ball pit set up in the lounge with climbing and a chocolate treat - I’d go for the latter every time...

That would be a bit odd if you didnt have children. Or had grown up children.

Stranger and stranger...

A family member brought their kids round - one almost secondary age and other a couple of years younger

They decided to have a fucking pillow fight with my brand new sofa cushions

Luckily my oh spotted it and stopped it, I’d have gone ballistic

They’re not coming back any time soon.

Oh @MzHz - this might need to be where I bow out. I LOVE a pillow fight - and would have joined in. In fact - I would select cushions on the propensity of their pillow fight status, rather than cream and fashionable.

This would really piss me off, it’s common curtesy not to let your child eat chocolate in someone else’s living room. I would be sending them the cleaning bill and wouldn’t care if it ends the friendship, a real friend wouldn’t let their child do this.

That’s what comes of trying to be a tactful nice host. Op I’d be just as upset and annoyed . They sound ghastly. They cannot possibly have failed to notice what was going on. I’d not be inviting such inconsiderate ‘friends’ back any time soon and tough luck if they’re offended. Don’t ever be worried about saying no to someone else’s child in your own home. Let the parents deal with the tantrum.

The children are currently chucking cushions around in the lounge and screaming with laughter. To me - this is FAR more important than exquisite cushions?? You only get to be a child once - the opportunity to become civilised and adultish comes later.

Can't believe the replies blaming the OP. OK, the parents shouldn't have given in to their child's whim - but once you were in the living room they should have been controlling their child ffs - and they should never have given the child the Easter egg in the living room.

OP, didn't the parents even apologise? They should have done so at the very least, and imo should have offered to pay for cleaning too.

A cushion fight in your own home, fine. Tunnels, dens with your own furniture fine.
In someone elses house - nope. Not unless its their idea/totally ok with it.

Haven't read everything but is there something you can do by putting a damp cloth over the stain and ironing it..presuming it's not leather. Then as chocolate melts it's easier to remove

@CatherineJHealy, have you tried baby wipes? Have you tried micellar water?
Another thing you can try is white vinegar.

My best friend visited with her baby and gave him a big breastfeed which the baby proceeded to throw up all over my settee. Children and mess are interchangeable.

@SchrodingersImmigrant

I can totally see the thread if op did try to "parent the child" by being firm about no food on a sofa?😂

^AIBU to bu fumming with friend?
Visited friend. She has white sofa. We were all having a chat etc and our child was about to eat some chocolate and friend said she cannot eat it there, but must go to the dining room. We said it's fine, but friend kept saying no and diverting DC to the dining room. Aibu to think it's fucking rude she is firm with my kid? Because of her precious sofa, we had to stop having fun and move to the dining room! Won't be visiting any time soon since she obviously cannot trust us around her posh furniture.^

Op yanbu and honestly, they should pay for cleaning

The depressing thing is that I can totally picture that thread.