Most Couples Are Doomed

[SmidgenofaPigeon]

I mean in film and TV and literature .

Often at the end of a film depicting a great love story I just think...nah....two years max.

Examples:
Rose and Jack if he hadn’t frozen to death. Would she REALLY have been content with a future cut off from society and spitting and ice-fishing her way round America? No.

Satine and Christian from Moulin Rouge. I know she’s dead (and died very beautifully and romantically from TB too) but if they’d had to leave Paris, rattling through Europe dragging a bird cage, it would be no time at all before she realised there’s no freedom in being dirt poor while Christian writes his book, she’d go back to her tried and tested ways in no time to make a few bob, he’d get jealous and she’d piss off to join a chorus line in London, not as the sparking diamond but a cubic zirconia near the back.

Film Harry and Ginny- he’d realise all those years of playing the field as the chosen one was a missed chance, and he’d move out to his own flat where he’d show off his new Nike AirMax to his bewildered children and boast about crazy nights out in the local bar. Ginny would sniff stoically in a beige trench coat and hold it together for the kids.

I’m sure there are loads more.

[SmidgenofaPigeon]

Ross was a rubbish father wasn’t he? He’d have been fine with a part time long distance dad role if they’d have gone to Paris.

Did Miranda and Steve divorce in SATC or have I made that up? I feel like they definitely would have done. Steve was only happy when Miranda pissed on her career and turned up to Brady Brady’s school shit.

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe]

@apalledandshocked

re Alan Rickman... He never actually left Emma Thompson did he? She dumped him (justificably) after finding out about the necklace and the shag. There is no way he would have left her to be with office woman on his own accord if he hadnt been discovered. So I think he would have been full of regret fairly quickly, the relationship with office woman would have limped on a while but he would be sad-eyeing Emma Thompson every time he picked up the kids and asking if they couldnt give it another chance meanwhile.

I think that's the trope of the embittered, cheated on wife. Sadly, some men leave their families because that's what they want to do. Flinging about facilitates that.

AR had no reason to have a fling in the office with a subordinate colleague, there was every reason not to. AR/ET's homelife was portrayed as boring/samey. Hugely poignant because many can relate to it. AR never shown as having a relationship with his children at all.

Getting back to light and fluffy, AR/ET not suited, AR/office lady run off into the sunset and never look back.

[Mittens030869]

But in the film, AR shows no signs of wanting to leave ET. He’s devastated at being caught and calls himself a ‘fool’. He doesn’t declare himself to be in love with the OW, far from it.

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe]

Yes Mittens, because he was caught. If he hadn't been then goodness knows how long it would have gone on for?

Anyway, in fantasy land, ET wouldn't have been in the picture at all so no cheating - AR would have met office woman and they would have been a couple.

[ScarfaceCwaw]

I wasn't under the impression that AR and ET had split at the end, but that they were together but barely. I kind of liked the realism of that, we neither have an instant split or a reconciliation, it's messy and ambiguous and it's unclear if they'll ever get through it.

[apalledandshocked]

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

Yes Mittens, because he was caught. If he hadn't been then goodness knows how long it would have gone on for?

Anyway, in fantasy land, ET wouldn't have been in the picture at all so no cheating - AR would have met office woman and they would have been a couple.

Exactly, he would have continued with office lady while still enjoying being married to ET. His ideal would be not to choose, but he didnt want to "leave" ET (he just wanted exciting sex with office lady)

[Mittens030869]

Scarface Cwaw

I agree, their marriage was left up in the air, which was a realistic ending. There was also no actual indication that the OW even wanted AR to leave ET for her.

[Honeyroar]

I think book Harry and Ginny were really well matched, and their love was a slow burning, gradually building thing. Ron and Hermione never worked for me. If he’d have loved, she’d have fitted with Cedric Diggory. Good looking, kind and intelligent. I always wanted Neville to end up with Luna, but actually she could’ve fitted with Harry. She had been through a lot herself, had a very open mind and was pretty supportive to him on many occasions.

Carrie in 4 Weddings was vile. She just played with Charles, didn’t care a bit about him. He would have been perfect with Fiona.

Ross and Rachel wouldn’t have lasted. He would drive anyone crazy. I think Chandler and Monica would last personally. Chandler was settling into the relationship and had always looked after Joey well...

There is a french pop song by a group called Telephone about Cinderella’s afterlife- how she’s stuck at home bringing up the kids while he’s out galavanting about on his white horse. I’ve always thought it amusing.

Rose and Jack. Not a chance. They were just another Baby and Johnny. I’d always wondered how she’d funded her exciting new life without flogging the diamond, but of course, the murdering husbands career is a perfect solution. And yes Titanic is a silly film full of flaws (it’s always driven me crazy that they ran around waist deep in icy water on the ship without a murmur, but immediately shivered, went blue and died when it sank. And why was there only one wardrobe floating about? That thing had hundreds of rooms, there would be stuff everywhere!) but I still love watching it.

Carrie and Big were both horrible selfish creatures who deserved each other. I reckon he blew all his money and life wasn’t such fun when the posh flat and the chauffeur went!

[Andante57]

Nancy Mitford had a good, if cynical view of relationships in the Pursuit of Love:

“But I think she would have been happy with Fabrice,”
I said. “He was the great love of her life, you know.”

“Oh, dulling,” said my mother, sadly. “One always
thinks that. Every, every time.”

[TatianaBis]

She may have had a less cynical view if she hadn't accepted the role of long term mistress...

[Peanutbutterandbananatoastie]

@SmidgenofaPigeon

Ross was a rubbish father wasn’t he? He’d have been fine with a part time long distance dad role if they’d have gone to Paris.

Did Miranda and Steve divorce in SATC or have I made that up? I feel like they definitely would have done. Steve was only happy when Miranda pissed on her career and turned up to Brady Brady’s school shit.

It always pissed me off how all of Miranda’s friends were on at her to forgive Steve. I don’t really believe that he would’ve cheated on her in the 1st place, because he knew she was far too good for him. But no one would’ve ever suggested that Carrie or Charlotte forgive a cheat. Such a crappy storyline.

[SchadenfreudePersonified]

@ScarfaceCwaw

I wasn't under the impression that AR and ET had split at the end, but that they were together but barely. I kind of liked the realism of that, we neither have an instant split or a reconciliation, it's messy and ambiguous and it's unclear if they'll ever get through it.

That was the impression that I got too.

It was a shite film. I only watched it once, and wasn't going to sit through it again. When I was reading the posts on here I thought I'd misremembered it. Glad I may not have.

[SchadenfreudePersonified]

I’d always wondered how she’d funded her exciting new life without flogging the diamond, but of course, the murdering husbands career is a perfect solution

In retrospect I wish I'd chosen this as a career path instead of Speech and Language Therapy, but it's always easy to be wise after the event.

[ScarfaceCwaw]

It is a shite film. One I've seen way too many times.

That said, ET and AR's storyline is the only one I felt had any emotional realism or value. ET's humiliation and pain, the fragility of her position as a SAHM who's lost much of her confidence and independence... That said, I do notice that as I approach middle age myself I increasingly find middle-aged women's stories to appeal much more to me than the kind of juvenile romantic wank that the rest of the film is. I rewatched Crazy Ex-Girlfriend this year and I responded much more to Paula Proctor's story (mid-40s mother wanting and needing to become more than that) and less to the twentysomething romantic angst of the protagonist. Which I guess goes to show I'm a self-absorbed dickhead.

That said, Paula Proctor and Scott are totally in the "real deal" bucket. And I have to put in a word for Miranda and Steve - I think they evolved together into something that really worked.

[JaninaDuszejko]

@Andante57

Nancy Mitford had a good, if cynical view of relationships in the Pursuit of Love:

“But I think she would have been happy with Fabrice,”
I said. “He was the great love of her life, you know.”

“Oh, dulling,” said my mother, sadly. “One always
thinks that. Every, every time.”

I love that quote from The Pursuit of Love. So much wisdom and sadness from the Bolter. I always read it as regret that she had kept running after her latest love only to discover they all become as irritating as each other once you have to actually live with them.

[SchadenfreudePersonified]

@ScarfaceCwaw

It is a shite film. One I've seen way too many times.

That said, ET and AR's storyline is the only one I felt had any emotional realism or value. ET's humiliation and pain, the fragility of her position as a SAHM who's lost much of her confidence and independence... That said, I do notice that as I approach middle age myself I increasingly find middle-aged women's stories to appeal much more to me than the kind of juvenile romantic wank that the rest of the film is. I rewatched Crazy Ex-Girlfriend this year and I responded much more to Paula Proctor's story (mid-40s mother wanting and needing to become more than that) and less to the twentysomething romantic angst of the protagonist. Which I guess goes to show I'm a self-absorbed dickhead.

That said, Paula Proctor and Scott are totally in the "real deal" bucket. And I have to put in a word for Miranda and Steve - I think they evolved together into something that really worked.

I agree with all of this.

[ChristmasFluff]

@Wizzbangfizz, I came on this thread to say Pacey and Joey - I shipped them from the start, and in the last episode I was soo glad they were together. I still love Pacey and Joey!

You mention Buffy - I think Spike was the real deal and loved her like Angel really didn't. I'd have loved for her and Spike to have made it - Spike loved her in her darkest places.

On a totally different theme, although people remember Heathcliff and Cathy (that patently would never have worked, and even Cathy knew it), the true love story of Wuthering Heights was Hareton and Young Cathy (Cathy II?). They were the real deal, their love grew as they got to know eachother, and they would have lasted.

[ChristmasFluff]

Dracula and Mina in Bram Stoker's Dracula would have made an excellent eternal couple too, without all the damn vampire hunters butting in.

[Andante57]

Janina yes, or that they let her down somehow.
I think it’s one of the best closing paragraphs.

[Andante57]

Any fans of The Real Charlotte?

I know fate decided otherwise for Francie, but I don’t think she would’ve been happy with Gerard Hawkins had she opted to go to New Zealand with him as he was a thorough bounder and cad.
On the other hand poor Francie being married to the ghastly Roddy Lambert who finally showed his true colours to her and anyway she was only with him out of desperation.
I suppose at least she might have had a year or two of fun in bed with Lt. Hawkins.

[apalledandshocked]

[quote ChristmasFluff]@Wizzbangfizz, I came on this thread to say Pacey and Joey - I shipped them from the start, and in the last episode I was soo glad they were together. I still love Pacey and Joey!

You mention Buffy - I think Spike was the real deal and loved her like Angel really didn't. I'd have loved for her and Spike to have made it - Spike loved her in her darkest places.

On a totally different theme, although people remember Heathcliff and Cathy (that patently would never have worked, and even Cathy knew it), the true love story of Wuthering Heights was Hareton and Young Cathy (Cathy II?). They were the real deal, their love grew as they got to know eachother, and they would have lasted.[/quote]
Yes. As far as the Heathcliff and Cathy go... - I think by the time you are up to your neck in your long dead girlfriends grave, as you exhume her body in order to retrieve her wedding ring in order to force her child and yours to marry as part of a complicated campaign of revenge against an entire family.... is sort of the point at which you should really realise you are in an unhealthy relationship. (If not before)

[FlorenceinSummer]

nar Buffy and Spike after he rapes her? WTF! Nope nope nope. I like to think that she stopped having to rely on a moody bloke to complete her and gone into therapy to address her daddy issues and her constant attraction to damaged/ unavailable men.

FireFly - Kaylee and Simon I rooted for them until the movie then I was more meh.

Darcy and Lizzie Yep agree they're still together, and Rapunzel and Flynn

I have issues with Anna and Kristoff, especially after the second movie, but like to think they worked things through.

[likeamillpond]

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

Yes Mittens, because he was caught. If he hadn't been then goodness knows how long it would have gone on for?

Anyway, in fantasy land, ET wouldn't have been in the picture at all so no cheating - AR would have met office woman and they would have been a couple.

It wouldn't have lasted between AR and Office Woman.
For a start he was a lot older than her.
Just as she's reaching her prime he would be slowly be entering old man, saggy assed, old dad bod, Viagra territory.
Couple that with loss of status through retirement.
You wouldn't see her for dust.

[bunglebee]

It's not like me to be a soppy romantic, but I like to think Simon and Kaylee worked it out.

Buffy and Spike, HARD NOPE. The scene where he attempts to rape her is incredibly hard to watch. I don't care what soul redemption whatever shenanigans went on afterwards. HE ASSAULTED HER AND ALMOST RAPED HER.

[42andcounting]

There's a song by a guy called Gecko, called Rapunzel about how she might have really reacted to being rescued from the tower and being expected to live happily ever after. I think it's brilliant 😁 It's on YouTube here